Thermonuclear Meltdown at Work

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I think I can put a fork in this job. Today started out OK, helped a few customers. Got an angry e-mail from a customer for something that is outside of the scope of what we're supposed to support. Doing OK so far. Fielded another angry customer, Lied like a thief to get this assclown of the phone. Then an account manager from a major account starting reaming me a new one about not being responsive enough to his customer. Told me how much our team sucks. Then I lost it. I told him "I AM DOING THE BEST I CAN DO!! ! I WORK 12 HOURS A DAY. I CAN ACCOMMODATE YOUR REQUEST TO ANALYZE THE CUSTOMER"S DATA RIGHT NOW BUT I'M GOING TO HAVE TO BLOW OFF THE REST OF MY CUSTOMERS!! !! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME!! !" I hung up on him, slammed the phone down on the receiver three times, got up and threw a chair across the room, and stormed off. I broke the chair.

I'm going to be fired for this. Which is best because I am very burnt-out and today I snapped. It's in HR's hands at this point and I don't expect to get off with a slap on the hand. If HR doesn't fire me, I will be looking for a new job or consulting work because I don't want do any more work as a phone monkey.

Sorry this happened..both the abuse from the customers and melting down<---which is no fun either. I hope it works out for the best and you find something more appropriate. I could never handle abuse and don't think anyone should have to. Are we really the "dysfunctional" ones that we find being abused unexceptable

I also work as a phone monkey and the same thing happened to me three times, as I recall, since I started in last december. Except it wasn't a chair but a water cooler and the other time the phone and my desk collided. The phone came out better, much to my surprise.
Anway, they didn't fire me (yet), and I don't really understand why. But almost every day I think I just can't go on anymore. But on the other hand, I don't have much opportunities to find another job, so I guess I got to stay.
But if you can find something else, go for it, I think almost everything is better for people like us than being a phone monkey.

sorry to hear about that

are your employers aware of your diagnosis?
maybe you could transfer to another department and do a different job which doesn't involve dealing with customers?

You must have scared your co-workers. Yes, I would say that job and you are misfits. I wish you well in finding a job that fits your skills and temperament in such a way that going to work is a joy.

Maybe you were a bit overworked, when I am tired I am more 'susceptible' to meltdowns or a bad atmosphere.
For me the best thing to do is sleep early and try to take some rest.

In March I was too late too realize and was really nasty to some colleagues. Luckily I work hard and was forgiven, but it is not a thing I should do too often.

Maybe a few days off would be a good thing.

Calling in a sickday would not be advisable, because of the situation at your work. Next time however, it could be a last effort. When you feel you are on the edge, just go home and mumble something about terrible head aches.

(I hope I take my own advice next time)

I never disclosed to my boss my AS out of fear that he would use it against me. I've been given the choice of resigning or waiting on what HR's decision is (termination or final warning). The only upside of leaving on my own is that I can still use my employer as a reference. Resigning or being fired, I can't collect unemployment so I'm really screwed. I'm too frazzled to make a decision.

Are you sure you can't get unemployment if you are fired....I thought you could and that is why companies don't want to fire people but either push them to quit or change their schedules around and do other things to make their lives miserable until they quit out of frustration.

I would not quit. You should consider going to human resources and telling them about your AS DX<----if you have one. You can explain that you did not disclose it,(I don't think you have to unless you require accomidations), because you did not think it would effect your ability to do the job.

I also believe their are some diability lawyers that work for free, if you can find them through your local AS chapter...if you have one.

The problem is that if I'm fired, I can't list my employer on my resume (or can I?). I wouldn't care so much if this was some small piss ant company but this is a rather well-recognized player in IT.

You can list them on your resume, the point is if you want to use them as a reference...which you sometimes have the choice not to do. It sort of depends on how long you worked there and if you feel the skills you learned there were worht listing on a resume...like if you planned on getting ajob where those skills were useful.

If you haven't worked ther for long then the gap in work history coud be covered by saying that you were on a personal course of stdy(it isn't lying in one way...you certainly did learn something there...that you hate being a phone monkey and being insulted stresses you out<---valuable learning experience ...If you didn't have the job long I wouldn't list it. If it is your only job experience....you may need to list it but say that your manager is no loner there for a reference and if they call the company I believe they are limited in the information they are allowed to give a future employee....Here is an interesting thing to do...Have a family memeber call and say they are "so ana so from such a such a company who is interested in hiring you and want some info about you"...see what they tell them. I think they can only give...wage you were making, job title, time periods you were working there and MAYBE if you left by choice or were fired<---I'm just not sure on that one. They are not supposed to go into details of the incident...that should be protected information but sometimes people Do tell. It's nice to find that out before you use them as a reference. Usually, in a larger company...the human resources person doesn't even know the past employee...they just read the legal information off of a sheet.


Anyway...one thing I would do is get your hiney down to sign up for unemployment. You may think you can't get it but let them decide that....You were fred for something related to your disability. They also have job finding resources there that will be free for you to use and you can ask them if they have any special accomidations for someone who has a disability? It would be nice if you could talk to an expert about what you can do in the future to prevent meltdowns and offer you some legal protections and help find a job that is more "aspie friendly"...Doesn't hurt to ask. I'm not sure of your age but if you can bring a parent along to help communicate for you if strangers get you flustered)I have a lot of social aniety and I am 44<---bring my BF to most my appointments and it really helps because I get so nervious I forget what questions I wnated to ask or what they said.

Don't assume that it isn't worht the hassle to apply. Get your name in the system and if you find another job before you need their services, you can always cancel. Wishing you luck and I ally hope you can get something that is a better fit for you in the near future.

The good thing is the boss I used to work with at the same company where I had the meltdown is working somewhere else (he got sick of the politics). He's much more easy-going and laid-back manager. He knows how to work with my issues and my AS. I've sent my resume to a mutual friend who works for Mr. Laid-back Boss and will get it in his hands.

Still having UI payments would be a contingency plan in case I'm not hired where Mr. Laid-back Manager works.

Anybody know where in the Boston-area where I can find a Linux sysadmin job?

Well, of possible see if MR laid back boss would be willing to right you a letter of recommindation that you can copy and add to your resume. I still would not wait to long for the UI? application because it can take a long time to process. I do think there is a week to 10 day wait before you are eligable but getting your name in the system is better sooner then later. Jut mentioning this because the last time I quit a job I really thought I would be able to find something in a few weeks and it ended up taking me two months. The economy is not very good in this country right now...maybe better in some areas. Still, don't wait to long.

Wow...

You can possibly save your job if you apologize and cite some sort of pressure in your life at the moment.

If you still want the job that is...

I too have had meltdowns at work, and have suffered as a result. After one meltdown, I walked out and never went back, went to the psychiatrist instead and got put on stress disability leave. Got more info, found out that I was a victim of a hostile work environment which is illegal in the US, so got a settlement for the amount of time I couldn't work from the stress.

It turned out okay in the end but it was a miserable job.

Maybe you can turn this into a positive thing - see a psychiatrist and talk about how the job made you miserable and exacerbated your AS. And definitely figure out a job that's less stressful.

If I was offered a job at Mr. Laid-back Boss' department, I would take it but as a stepping stone towards the next stage in my career. Going forward, I will put a honest day's work in and maintain my work/life balance.

Regardless of where you work, you owe it to your employer to use every resource at your disposal to mitigate problems at work caused by your Aspergers. They should know you are doing so after you complete your "probationary period". Showing that you leave no stone unturned to meet them halfway would be a bigger asset than the Aspergers would be a liability.