Is it possible for an aspie to show empathy?

Post Reply New Topic

My son used to get upset when other kids were crying. At first I thought it was because he didn't like the sound of crying. But now, as he is getting more verbal, if a kid is crying, he will say to me "Is someone upset?" Then he will run over to them even if he doesn't know them to see what is going on. I am not sure if it is empathy or if he is just curious about how others are expressing emotions. Sometimes when other kids are getting in trouble, he starts hitting on me, and I am not sure what that is about either. So, I don't know if my son has empathy or not. I do know if I ever cry about something at home, he doesn't even seem to notice that I am upset. Of course I am not crying really loud like a toddler or anything, so I don't think he sees the emotions on my face.

My 11 year old son will give comfort to those who look upset but his real empathy comes only if he has experienced what that person has experienced.

Your son's psych is a quack.

I do think it's odd to want to change someone's dx based on one trait.

My 6yo aspie likes to be useful, likes to see a need and fill a need. On one hand I wouldn't call her empathetic in the way my older son is empathetic, where she would just sit and feel bad for someone, and yes, she misses a lot of social cues; but on the other hand, she often surprises me with seeing that I or her brother need something, and she will just go do it or get it or whatever the situation calls for. It makes her very happy to be able to do for people. So I suppose what she has is a sort of active sympathy. It reminds me of that very tender heart beneath her stubbornness.

This is what the DSM IV says:

(I) Qualitative impairment in social interaction, as manifested by at least two of the following:
(A) Marked impairments in the use of multiple nonverbal behaviors such as eye-to-eye gaze, facial expression, body posture, and gestures to regulate social interaction
(B) Failure to develop peer relationships appropriate to developmental level
(C) A lack of spontaneous seeking to share enjoyment, interest or achievements with other people, (e.g.. by a lack of showing, bringing, or pointing out objects of interest to other people)
(D) Lack of social or emotional reciprocity.

By no means does this mean there is no ability to empathize; it means there may be a lack of it in some cases.
Empathy is organic, and one of the things that makes social animals successful. Some people have an impaired sense of empathy, and it's development can be systematically altered by the environment, such as the case with sociopaths. "Social reciprocity" would seem to suggest something more incidental, such as manners and being curtious; I cant say if this is meant to be interchangeable with empathy in this context, but the two are not mutually inclusive.
In my case, I do not always experience it at appropriate times. So, yes there is a definite lack of it, but it's not absent from a human perspective.

I suppose so. When people think I am being empathatic, it is usualy fake. I pretend to care but in reality I do not give s**t. If it's someone I do not know I don't even pretend to care such as when Anna Nicole (I had no idea who she was anyway) and Micheal Jackson died or on September 11th.