Not sure how to handle “immature?” son?

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I LOVE Mario myself. Always have. That is why I was confused as to why they were picking on him for it. If you saw the school he was in, you would understand more though. These kids are all done up. Their parents are so worried about making them all look "cool" and the kids are all snobby because of it. I will tell you what all the kids his age are playing now; games like Call of Duty Black OP's, not Mario. What is this world coming to??

I don't know but it's scary. My partner and I were both the shortest kids in our classes too. I stopped growing when I was about 12, but he kept growing past high school and got to be 5'11''.

This thread brings up an important life skill to teach to a child: knowing how to fly under the radar. This is similar to, but not the same as, fitting in. First of all, let's face it: for a lot of aspie children, being popular in school past fourth grade is a largely a pipe dream. (In lower grades of elementary school, kids are less judgmental, so an aspie child can "fly under the radar" easily enough to attain some popularity.) Flying under the radar means passing for an all-around average kid who's got nothing to be made fun of, but not necessarily popular enough to be a class leader.

In your case, your son made get made fun of for wearing a Mario shirt, but probably not for wearing a basic gray shirt with a small Addidas logo (as an example). It won't be seen as cool as Hollister, Pac Sun, or whatever else kids wear nowadays (I have no idea, and I'm 27), but it's not "bad" enough to be made of, and kids are aware of that. (In the late 1990's, it was Reebok in middle school, and Abercrombie in high school.) Military camouflage shirts are good for flying under the radar too. With the Iraqi war going on and army-related stuff being seen as masculine, a camouflage shirt is a safe bet.

Retro stuff like Mario, not so much, and here's why. It's tolerated in high schools and older, but that's mainly because high schoolers are old enough to remember the classic Mario from the first Super Mario Brothers game. It has a nostalgic value. The closest thing to the original Mario kids know nowadays is the Wii version. And it's probably the only one they know, as opposed to seeing many different versions of the character since the late 1980's. For kids born in 2000's, there is no nostalgia associated with Mario, and therefore, no coolness factor.

If your son likes clothes with video game themes, perhaps you can encourage him to wear shirts showing more modern video games, like Call of Duty. In that case, a basic camouflage shirt will be fine; your son can easily respond "whatever, this is close enough" if someone says something.

Now, I'm not saying that your son needs to deny himself who he is. But the truth is, he also needs to understand that one's public self and private self do not have to be one and the same. There is nothing wrong with wearing a sporty-looking shirt in school, and a Mario shirt at home and in public (where people are too busy with their own problems to care). If he, for some reason, isn't bothered by being laughed at, then more power to him, but I'd still encourage him to wear clothes that are more tolerated by his classmates.

I don't think 10 is too old to wear Mario shirts and I'm betting his clothing isn't really the problem. He probably just comes across as one of those kids who's easy to bully. He probably tries to defend himself against these bullies by engaging with them and trying to reason with them, or at least at first, and they probably discovered they can get a rise out of him because of this.

Your son is getting bullied because other kids want him to feel bad. Whether or not he wears a Mario t-shirt isn't really the issue. If you take it away, then they'll make fun of him for something else.

In middle school, I got picked on for wearing shirts with cartoon characters. However, this was the early 90s when it was "cool" to wear shirts with cartoons on them. The kids who made fun of me were typically also wearing shirts featuring cartoons characters, but they were wearing them at exactly the same time as when they were making fun of me.

Conclusion: bullies aren't rational. I remember one incident where a girl who was wearing a t-shirt and sweatpants was harassing me for wearing a t-shirt and sweatpants. Their goal is to hurt your son's feelings, not to get him to change wardrobe. This is how I finally decided that I was going to wear things that made ME happy since I was never going to make anyone else happy. My hearts bleeds for your son.

Good luck.

Thanks everyone. I was blaming myself for not explicitly teaching him how he “should” be acting for his age and all, but it seems that most of you feel that kids will be cruel regardless. I suppose he does have a different outlook on life than “normal” kids his age, and that is probably the main cause of any bullying he gets. He is just wise, and logical, yet naïve for his age. It is such a strange combination. Still, he doesn’t hold a candle to his 5 year old brother. He is so difficult and no matter where he goes, daycare or school, parents tell their children not to be friends with him. It breaks my heart Somehow though, the other kids are drawn to him. For now....

My 10 year old son has a red Super Mario Bros shirt he likes to wear at least once a week to school but he is never bullied. I don't think it's the shirt, maybe the other kids see a weakness they can pick on...I mean maybe he's shy and you know how bullies look for people to pick on. Maybe try working with building up his confidence with things like Boy Scouts or something. Also, talk to the teacher - bullying is just unacceptable and I think it should be addressed asap.

I was teased also for having 'eccentric' interests. Personally, I feel that the current generation are growing up way too fast, compared to my generation. I got teased for loving Peter Gabriel and Genesis at that age...that to me seems a lot more "normal" than what other people were listening to, like Marilyn Manson (not that there's anything wrong with his music, it's just not age appropriate for kids.)

I'd say that your son has a healthier outlook on life in general than his peers. At 10 years old, he should be focusing on being a child. He shouldn't be worrying about dating and being an adult, because he isn't an adult. He is a kid. Let him be a kid.

Oh, and anybody who would tease someone for wearing a Super Mario t shirt, especially a little kid, is not worth bothering with. Those kids need better role models, and you don't have to change what you're doing, because you're being a very good role model for your son.

I have an almost 15 year old with AS. He's very successful, has always been mainstreamed since kindergarten, and is an honor student. I attribute him doing well in school in part to the fact that he's never been bullied or had problems in school. My son is not into the same things other kids are into. He's let go of the Pokemon and Digimon stuff that he was once so into, but he still likes some things that are not age appropriate. He actually still looks at the Digimon site and he loves Bionicles and now Hero Factory. He also reads Goosebumps books which are for like 5th graders. But it's something he's always enjoyed so I let him have it. The difference is, that I DO tell him that it's really for younger kids. I've NEVER told him that he'll be made fun of if other kids knew he was into this stuff. But by my telling him that it's really not age appropriate but it's ok for him to like it, he understands that other kids might poke fun at him. So he doesn't discuss these topics with his high school classmates. He's never been advised not to, he just knows it's best. Because we've told him what's age appropriate and what isn't, it makes him aware that kids his age won't think it's age appropriate either. I don't want my son to be embarrassed about his hobbies or interests, but I also don't want him picked on. He is who he is and I would never take that from him...but it's good for kids to know what is appropriate or not so they save themselves the heartache of being picked on at school. It's our job to protect our kids and if informing him is how I can protect him, then that's exactly what I'll do. Gently and in a kind, non judgmental way, but inform him nonetheless.