competitiveness/sore loser

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Well, Alien Papa, I'm glad to hear someone tried to lose every time and it didn't work, either. We never went that route and I always wondered - but I'm guessing DS would react the same way.

Most people with AS I have encountered are not competitive and would rather not be in the position of having to compete with anyone with perhaps the exception of the occasional board game.

I think kids with ADHD are possibly more likely than usual to be sore losers. Children who are perfectionists or pessimists also seem more likely to be sore losers. I don't think it's a trait of AS though.

I disagree: what you describe as "rather not be in the position of having to compete" is, in a way, a sign of excessive competitiveness; giving up is another way to control the outcome of a competition. I think many kids with rigidity issues (a trait of AS) have this as a symptom.

If you want to interpret it that way but then I would have to say I think that interpretation is generally incorrect and most people with AS are not going to see it the way you do.

I am not athletic, but am very competitive in games like euchre, and when I was in college, with academics. if I lose or fail, look out. I tend to breakdown and cry. gladly, with the exception of euchre, I tend to win or succeed at many things.

I am not/was never "competitive," however, I am/was a perfectionist. I have a hard time forgiving myself for my flaws.

I had the "sore loser" issue and it was triggered by the following:

1. Control issues. I lost a game, my "control" was lost. Not cool. Games, much like social interactions with other people, are random, unpredictable, and aggravating.

2. Poor motor skills, especially in front of others. It's extremely frustrating when your body won't do what you want it to, especially when you're being yelled at or made fun of. Ditto that for any other skills such as following directions, keeping track of score, ect. that your particular Aspie may struggle with.

3. Sensory overload. Self-explanatory.

4. See above. Perfectionism.

5. Winning feels good. Normal kids got to win at stuff. Unfortunately, most of my interests didn't lend themselves to "competition," at least not in the dramatic sense where you "win" to the sound of applause and peer acceptance.

6. Extreme/rigid thinking. "I suck at this. I suck at EVERYTHING!! !" *Initiate shutdown/meltdown*

That's about it in a nutshell.