Autism Hygiene Tips and Tricks for Parents?

Post Reply New Topic

The answer for us was a combo of all described already. First of all, my daughter hates water. Even from a very small infant, she never had the reflex to hold her breath so she will aspirate any water poured onto her head into her lungs. We had an OT work with her on toothbrushing and hair washing and hair brushing. It seems everything on her head is extra sensitive. Just softly brushing her hair makes her scream like she is in horrible pain.

She brushes her teeth 2x a day. I have never let her not do it, so she knows it is REQURED. Yes, there's complaining but it gets done.

She washes her hair 2x per week. This is usually an ordeal-with crying, yelling, splashing, and sometimes self abuse. But she always does it the same nights every week so it is REQUIRED.

She brushes her hair every morning. I am not such a stickler on this but she must make the effort-it is required.

While we are still dealing with the emotional and physical turmoil these activities bring, we get it done. Right now we are working on getting her to have her hair cut. I am the only one who has cut it and I haven't in a vry long time. So I want to work on finding someone she will let touch her hair.

As far as seeing a dentist-we have horror stories about this. She has been papoosed twice at a dental office for going into a meltdown and them fearing for her safety. We found a pediatric anesthesiologist and they put her under General Sedation and capped her rear teeth that will fall out around 12 years old and sealed all her other teeth with multiple surfaces. Now, she doesn't need invasive dentisty (because her teeth are all protected). We visit a dentist 2 x per year and he has a daughter with ASD so he takes a lot of time, gets her used to everything before he goes near her, and sometimes he doesn't even touch her if she is not receptive. We are working on getting her able to have a cleaning.

Coming at this from the non-parent perspective :

I think for me what helped best was to make hygiene convenient, routine and comfortable. Also to let me work out my own routine rather than have to do things in the order someone else imposed on me.

Tuttle mentioned separating hair washing. That was something I liked when I was young, to wash my hair separately, in a sink. From the time I was small, getting water in my eyes, or combing out wet hair was difficult. A good slick conditioner and comb, keeping it trimmed, and giving hair a separate space and span of time can make an amazing difference. A deep sink and high faucet. I wash my hair in the shower now, I'm not sure why a separation for this was so important when I was young, but it was, well into my 20s.

If you have trouble getting a child to want their hair trimmed, remind them it will be easier to comb out.

When I neglected to be hygienic, it was usually a matter of comfort, time or convenience. I'm absent-minded - and cranky - when rushed!

Fluffy or really comfy towels make a difference to me. Others might not like them too fluffy. Liking the feel of the bathmat under my feet is important. I've thrown out a bathmat just because I hated how rough it felt. A shower spray that feels good on my skin. (This is more difficult a problem than it should be.)

A warm bathroom (in winter - warm already before I need it) helps. The bathroom being convenient to my room - privacy. A comfortable bath robe for the season (warm for winter, light for summer). All those things still induce me to pay more attention to cleanliness.

NOT BEING RUSHED.

Learning to lay out clothing the night before helps a LOT. This speeds me through the process of morning grooming, and again if I'm on time and don't feel rushed, I'm less likely to forget something important. I used to sometimes spend a half hour trying to decide what to wear.

An alarm clock that I like. I remember how much I loved the radio alarm I got as a teen, and kept turned to my favorite station. But I had to also be careful the radio didn't distract me from dressing.

Taking time the night before to think ahead, consider what clothing will work best for tomorrow's activities and weather, whether it's already clean, ironed, whether it needs mending or there's something that I've forgotten I didn't like about it the last time I wore it. And a backup plan, in case that outfit doesn't work out. As a child I became obsessed with weather forecasts, and that was part of the reason, to help me decide what to wear. I also had trouble remembering school assignments that I needed to take care of in the morning. I'd remember right before school and that would fracture the routine. My mom learned to ask me about things like that the night before.

Clothing that works and fits was important. As a girl I wanted to be somewhat in fashion but I also needed clothes that were comfortable - didn't ride up, tug or irritate, or crease or wrinkle too easily or cause accidental immodesty (horizontal buttonholes don't come undone as easily) - and that I didn't have to fuss with too much every time I used the bathroom. If a button or zipper didn't quite work right, it could literally throw off my morning routine and make me miserable all day.

What I figured out early, mainly because my mom taught me to sew, and I liked to make my own clothes, was that what really mattered to me when I chose clothing was color, pattern and texture. But while wearing it, fit and comfort became the focus. If I could have simple styles, that were comfortable, close to the current styles other kids wore, and were made with the colors and fabrics I loved, I was happy. The simpler the better. It was more problematic if the color of blouse I loved in the store came with a fastener that didn't work for me, or a seam that irritated me, or buttons that stuck out funny, etc.

I know it seems strange to focus on clothing as an aid to hygiene, but these are all part of the process, and it's amazing how the smallest problem with an item of clothing, or not having everything out where I'd see it, can throw me off in my morning routine.

Again, I can be really absent-minded when I feel rushed. If anything threw me off in the morning, it could make me forget to brush my teeth or put on deodorant. I even remember one morning in second grade when I got halfway to school and then ran home to get underpants! I can laugh about it now. Back then it ruined my whole day.

I never thought of this back then, but today if I had a kid with Aspergers, I'd work with them to come up with a morning checklist. Let them decide the order, and tweak it for a while until it fits the routine they choose. Just a thought.

I'm 48 and I still hate to shower or take a bath. However, I do it almost every day because it makes me feel better, and I'm "supposed to". (I have AS, married to an NT - who doesn't bathe as often as I do - and have 4 NT kids). What works for me is knowing that I need to do it so that I don"t look nasty or smell bad and I try and do it as quickly as I can. I take the quickest shower you could imagine, but I get clean. Maybe if you explain a quick way to do it and set a timer for the bathroom, that would help. For older kids, put a radio in there and see if they can finish in one song.

My kids take horribly long showers and when they all shower right after each other, the hot water is gone. I can't imagine being in there that long.

For those who don't know how to take quick showers (my kids didn't and I had to explain the steps to them) this is what I do.

Turn the water on to get to the right temp. Meanwhile, brush teeth in the sink, and then wash face and neck with a wash cloth and rinse off. Take the same washcloth into the shower, rub lots of soap on it and put it somewhere the water wont hit. Wet hair and rub in shampoo. Scrub all over the scalp and then step back under the water and rinse out. Always keep your back to the water. Put in conditioner, put hair on top of head and grab the wash cloth. Wash entire body (chest, back, each arm, underarms, feet, legs, crotch, behind) with it using fast motions, getting the soap all over and using enough pressure to lightly scrub. Put wash cloth down, step back under shower, rinse conditioner out, move around under shower letting the water hit all over and rubbing your hands all over to wash off soap. Turn off water, wrap a towel around your hair, dry off, put on deoderant and lotion, dress. You're done now except for the hair drying and makeup for girls.

Knowing I can do it in a hurry is the only saving grace. I don't have sensory issues with it, I just don't like having to do it. I don't know why, I just don't. Someone suggested unscented things, but I'm the opposite. I love certain scents. I can use anything, in a pinch, but there are things I really like. I've never liked soaking in a bubble bath for example, but I will take one if I have rose scented bubble bath. Unless the kid has really bad smell issues and they don't like any smells, take them somewhere to pick out their own soap, deoderant, etc. Bed, Bath, and Beyond or somewhere like that has lots of nice smelling stuff. When I was a kid, we didn't have a shower but I enjoyed taking a bath if I had rose bubble bath, soap, lotion and powder. I also used to like using Jean Nate. I still have certain soaps and powders that I like. To this day, I prefer taking a shower with Safeguard, and a bath with Ivory. I like using original scent Shower to Shower as well when I use powder.

If the child says that other kids are making fun of them, I'd think it's kinder of the parent to point out that it could be hygeine that's causing it. I was made fun of for years because of that and my mother just ignored it and said that the other kids were wrong for making fun of me. I would much rather she had said "It's because you don't wash, go take a bath". However, she wasn't very clean herself (different issues, she's NT but she's borderline personality) so she didn't really notice other people's nastiness. I remember when she got me a job where she worked when I was 15, I overheard other people talking about how she was dirty, and when I told her she got mad at me like it was my fault. I think the worst thing you can do is to let it slide or to only address the bullying, and not the thing that the kid could be bullied over.

Also, all kids go through phases where they don't want to wash. My NT kids did that. Between about 8 and 11 it's like pulling teeth to get them to wash. Depending on which kid it was, I'd either tell them they couldn't do anything until they took a shower, or I'd give them a reward system. Different tactics work on different kids. Boys are worse than girls about that, in my experience. Sometimes, with boys, it's easier to just let them go a day or two without a shower, but you have to make them brush their teeth at least once a day. When it got difficult to get them to do that, sometimes I'd let the night brushing slide, but I'd stand over them in the mornings before school and make them brush. I'd rather them go to sleep with food on their teeth than go around with horrible breath all day.

No matter whether your kid is NT or AS/ASD, you are going to have some kind of trouble getting them to wash, at some point. When mine were very young, I'd buy them special bath stuff like toys and soaps, etc. Sometimes, up until about age 6, I'd actually get in there and wash them myself and then let them play. I would do a quick wash with them.

One thing that worked was to run a tub of water and put a few squirts of baby shampoo in it. It would bubble up like a bubble bath and I would just wet the cloth in the water and wash them all over with it, then pour it over their heads and scrub a little, and pour more over, then let them play. I could wash an entire child, hair and all, in under a minute that way. No, you don't get the soap off that way, but its' baby shampoo and so it's not that bad. It's better than the alternative.

_________________
I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA.

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com

When I was younger for me it was a matter of not really caring how I looked as well as poor fine motor skills. I mean, I wasn't a dirty child, I had a bath or shower every morning and I washed my hair everyday. For me it was more like, I didn't care how my hair looked, I didn't really know how to do hairstyles...even basic ponytails, I had trouble brushing my teeth properly and in different directions because of my fine motor challenges, I didn't scrub hard enough when I was washing my body or I just wouldn't care about certain things.

I can help you out with some fun sayings or songs you can sing with your child to make certain routines more fun based on from when I was a child and with my child care experience.

One thing my parents taught me about brushing my teeth to make it more fun and understandable on how to brush your teeth:
Up like a rocket
Down like the rain
Back and forth like a choo choo train

When washing hands, you can make up a song:
Wash, wash, wash your hands
Wash them front and back
Use some soap, scrub and run
Germs go down the drain

Remember, one thing that you can use for children of all ages is positive reinforcement. Make sure when they actually take the initiative to do something properly with their personal hygiene, give them lots of positive reinforcement. ex- "I love how you brushed your hair today! You did a great job!

Also, remember to always model proper personal hygiene when the time comes for you to do it. Say it out loud. ex- After coming in from walking the dogs at the park. "I'm going to wash my hands now after playing and getting dirty at the park so we don't spread germs.", "It's time to wash our hands before dinner." "I'm going to have a shower now." Also, when it's time for the child to do something personal hygiene related, if you see them doing something wrong just redirect them and show them the right way and give them reason why it has to be done that way.

I just noticed that someone had mentioned dry shampoos. I've only had experience with one of them, so my experience is limited. It was a "shampoo cap" that came home ffrom the hospital with my mother this past time. My mother has never been a very clean person, and hygeine is way down on her list of priorities anyway, but being sick and recovering from surgery, it's even lower, which is natural for anyone. I stayed with her for a while, and I would give her a sponge bath almost every day and had her at least wash her face and clean her dentures once a day (which was honestly more often than she's done in years). She hadn't washed her hair in a couple of months before she got sick anyway (she keeps it up in a small bun, so you really don't notice that it looks dirty, it just smells) and I had requested that they give her a shampoo in the hospital before she came home, because they have equipment to do it in the bed there, but she declined. I talked her into letting me use the shampoo cap one day. I used it, and her hair seemed marginally cleaner, but the smell was sickening from it. I don't know if it was a combination of her own hair oils etc and the chemicals, or just the chemicals. Either way, the smell just turned my stomach. I could smell it across the room. Her sense of smell is almost gone, so it didn't bother her. I ended up putting it up in a bun when it was dry and just coating it with hairspray to cover the smell.

So, if you want to use a dry shampoo, use it on yourself first, or someone who has no objections to washing their hair. That way if it's a bad smell, it can be washed out right away. Don't ever try anything like that first on somebody who wont let you wash it out, or is unable to get to a sink or tub.

_________________
I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA.

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com