New here one aspie son and another possible

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He's only in 5th grade! He has so much homework.

I may call the school and question that. 1 hour per night would be no big deal.

They're doing something wrong then. A child in 5th grade shouldn't even have an hour homework per night. I wonder if you could develop selective hearing when the teachers have a whinge about the homework.

I could but it wouldn't help his grades. His grades are dropping drastically. He can get all A's and B's but he's getting D's because of the homework. I think I am gonna contact the school and let them know how much homework he has been getting.

They're acting like idiots and trying to bluff you out of asking the hard questions about how they are supposed to help your son cope better with school. Is he officially diagnosed? I have heard about IEPs but don't know much about them and if they would apply in your situation but it's a possible avenue to consider. If you know any other parents with children in the same class or at least the same year as your son you could ask them how much homework their kids are doing.

If they also express concerns about excessive homework, a deputation of several people could approach the head teacher and it would be more likely that several people would be listened to.

Is it possible to get your son into another school where they will be more reasonable? I know there has been a trend towards fewer exams and more continuous assessment and that could be why they are stressing homework so much but 3 hours a night is too much by far.

There is one other possibility though. Your son might be struggling with the homework itself and not understanding how to do it. So what might be meant to take an hour could be taking much longer, especially if he is struggling.

I was usually good with homework but when I didn't understand a couple of units I didn't do homework in that subject and told the teacher I lost my book. I was too embarrassed to tell my parents I didn't understand as I was usually very good academically.

Your son might also simply be tired. We have to work so much harder than most to process all the incoming stimuli from the outside world so tiredness is frequently an issue.

Jake is not officially diagnosed. We are trying to diagnose him now.

My older son Tristan IS diagnosed and he does go to a different school. His school does so well at working with him. He gets an IEP every year and they really do work to let the teachers know the childs limits. He cannot read at all so the school gives him a scribe. When he first started going to his school he was so far behind and it was all because of his reading. Once he was diagnosed they were able to help him better and he went from being well below grade level to exceeding grage level.

Jake don't get an IEP. He has always had trouble getting homework done. He has NEVER had as much as he has this year. Some days he will bring home 6-7 pages of work and he will have to read a chapter out of a book and do an essay on that. When I asked about an IEP earlier in the year they told me that he was tested and he doesn't qualify for special services. The funny thing is, it was the school who wanted him to see a neurologist.

It has been suggested that I homeschool him but with the homework struggles we have I honestly don't think I could do it. I get so easily frustrated with him and quite often have to leave the room so I don't snap at him. At the same time I think it would be really good if I could homeschool because of his bathroom issues. He gets picked on about that and he hates it. We try so hard not to get upset about that because it may be a medical problem but it is extremely frustrating.

is there a school social worker that you could talk to about how much distress your son is in ?