Behavior/discipline advice?

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I know an autistic boy down the street that needs a T.V. to fall asleep. I think the mom actually does not allow sound, or it has to be really quiet, but without it, he would not sleep. This boy is very low functioning however. I think you will find that if you are very consistant about the routine, they will get better, it should improve from here on in. One thing you may want to do is sit in the room in the dark, and if they start talking, remind them to close their eyes and it is sleep time. Alternatively, it may be best to put them down one and then the other, although this can be a problem with some siblings. In my house, we worked on getting the 4 year old in bed at a decent hour first, the two year old stayed up. Then the two year old started being tucked in everynight with his sister (they also share a room) but he could get up right after. Finally, on his own free will, he started going down on his own with his sister! It all happened over a few months, after years of bedtime chaos!




Aspies seem to have a typical reactions to sleeping meds...

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Good luck! If they don't say that you are AS, don't take it too hard, you still could be and they are wrong, try a different team in a year or so...

lol, oddly, there was just a thread about that in general-seems a lot of people have the same problem with sleeping meds o.O

http://www.wrongplanet.net/modules.php? ... ic&t=33534

it was kind of interesting how many others had this problem as well. The vicodin helps (yes, I really am in pain though, lol), but after a few days of it, I'll start to get wired instead of tired.

My therapist hasn't voiced anything against me taking the test as he's very interested in the results as well If he says I'm not, lol, I'll just be... extremely confused, because I am an odd textbook example of the criteria. My boyfriend has even pointed this out, and my mother agrees as well.

I don't know if it means anything at all, as I'm really not sure what the actual test is going to be like, but I score about a 43/50 on the AQ and 172/200 on the "Aspie-quiz". Sadly, much of my excitement to take the test (besides getting it out of the way so I'll shut up about it, lol-been talking about it for 3 weeks now), is to see how closely it resembles either of those. I get really happy over stupid things like that, lol. Not because I scored so high on the others, because I know on-line tests usually don't compare well at all, but just to see exactly what the difference between the on-line and the real one is like I mean.

Basically it's just a sigh of relief to be finally taking it and getting it overwith-3 weeks of nothing but talking about how badly I feel I need to take it (I'm one of those that needs specific direction to do ANYTHING-so if I'm diagnosed it serves more as a "roadmap" to me than anything, otherwise I just feel I'm stuck at a stop sign not knowing which way to turn) and thinking about all of this as well, and about 4 months of just straight non-stop thought trying to figure out/analyze myself to see what is going on, lol-it's all I've been able to talk about, lol, my bf will be thrilled to not have to listen about it anymore. It will be a really nice break for my brain to shift focus finally

...and I do realize there is always the chance he might say I'm not. I haven't blocked that out-but I do find it highly unlikely that that will be the case It's kind of sad that I need the big yes/no so badly that I'm actually like, happy about this... it's nothing to be happy about in any way, shape, or form, lol.

Well, I turned off the movie, they are laying down now-5 year old is already out like a light, lol... he went down in about 45 minutes of reading his story book I now have an alarm clock with some nature sounds going in their room-2 year old throwing a fit 'cuz she doesn't want to sleep, lol. She's looking at a book right now, but is overly excited about stuff I'm just kind of letting her roam as long as she isn't waking him up, she will lay down when she's tired I'm sure.

Zack seemed to like this better-while he really really really wanted to watch his fav. movie (Dora the Explorer), I think he liked winding down this way as he does enjoy reading a lot.

I think all your feelings about the tests and such are very normal, especially for someone who is feeling like an overwhelmed parent out of control with their life and not understanding "why". The scores you have seem very high, that is not a bad thing, but I think it is definately a strong indication that you have AS traits. (I think I scored 36/50 and 140 something out of 200 on the other.)

I had to answer a bunch of questions for my son over the phone because I am trying to get him into a clinic. They where not the same questions, but the format was the same. Probably a good thing that you got some practice!

I am glad bed time went a little better! I would not focus on the two year old too much right now, get one kid really good with the routine, include the two year old in the routine, but if you don't think she is overly tired, then it may be wise to let her get up again for a bit. Maybe try to cut back the naps or go to the park as much as you can in the evening to tire them out! (Sometimes hard if you are alone I know).

yeah, I just want him to lay down-I make her lay down too as she is extremely stubborn and I know if I let her go and just stay up, she will be HORRIBLE in a few years if I let her just do whatever now, lol. She's a little drama queen majorly XD

She wandered around for about 10 minutes after I posted, got mad at me because I wouldn't let her... ugh, I don't even remember what it was now, lol, but she threw a fit and went to be dramatic on her bed, then fell asleep during it, lol. She had the whole "oh god the world is going to end" thing going on, lol. Also took the holding advice today as well.

My son arrived home from school-he preplans his entire evening on the bus ride home I swear, every day. Poor thing gets home and tells me he wants to play with the little girl next door, so he knocks on her door and she wasn't home. He cried for an hour over it then the kid down the street came over and came inside the house-I know his mom has a rule about that and he kept telling me it was okay. So finally, I just had an odd feeling about it, as I know kids will bend rules at times. I just decided to mozy over there and at least let his mom know he was inside playing video games in case she needed him for anything, so she would know where to look or where he was. Bingo! He was lying, so the mom comes over and makes him go home altogether I was hoping she'd just make him play outside or something, it seemed a bit extreme to me, lol.

Zack was really upset and angry over that too, he blamed me for his friend having to go home, and was just upset altogether because 2 of his plans just completely fell through. I felt HORRIBLE. He was pretty angry at first (he was throwing things and hitting things when i went to him), and pulled away, but I got ahold of him, and his pushing and being very angry quickly went to tears and hugs

It's not a bad thing I don't think-I held him on my lap for half an hour while he just cried, and afterwards he said "thank you" and "I love you". I don't know if it will work in other situations obviously as he was just very distraught because of his plans falling through, but I might try it and see how it goes if he gets out of hand over something different. I actually felt very connected to him this afternoon during that-so much better than normal. Thanks a million

I know it seems like such an obvious thing to do, but for me it's really hard to just react that way naturally to anything. So it really really helped a LOT.

About the park, I'm really hoping for something to happen, something to get me out and doing things. I have been in my house for the most part for 2 YEARS now, lol-not because of kids or anything, but because of me. It's nice to get out once in a while, of course, but it still feels very chaotic for me for some reason, even if no one else is there. Just too much to look at maybe, I'm not sure. This summer I'm going to try to force myself to take them out more-last summer they were in daycare during the day just for more interaction and such, so they got to do a lot. I tried to make several attempts to take them out last summer and didn't wind up doing most of them the times I did take them out didn't last long at all before I was ready to leave >.<

I was a very young mom, 17 when I had my first. I was living with my mother at the time, and she used to get really mad at me, because I seemed to be in another world much of the time when my son was crying, or I did not "talk to him" enough during feedings or diaper changes. I was home with him 24/7, I spend all my money on him, I got nothing really for myself, I loved that kid more then life itself if that is possible. But I just had no parenting instincts. It was the source of more then one screaming match initiated by my mother (now that is beyond me, how is subjecting a child to watching his mother being verbally abused because she failed to "talk to him" during a diaper change acceptable? ) Anyway, I improved in time, I was not perfect with my next two children, but definately a little better being aware of what I could do differently. What seemed to come automatically to many I needed to be programed with. Even still though, when one of my children is upset, I often feel repelled from them, not like getting down and hugging them! I will force myself if I know they need me, but even the two year old seeks out Dad first if he is home for a "hug" or to kiss a boo boo better! It is kind of sad and funny and pathetic on my part at the same time... Don't get me wrong, I have a very close relationship with all my kids, love them to pieces, and they do "demand" hugs from me, but the instinctual parenting? Just not me unfortunately! So you are not alone.

Have a good night!

lol, yeah, I'm gonna be keeping an eye on that kiddo from now on I don't know if he *knew* he wasn't supposed to come in, or if it was a recurring problem, because he kept saying "It should be okay if I'm in the living room-the front door is open so I can hear her yell if she needs me". Regardless, from now on, it's strictly outside play unless priorly arranged between she and I because I don't know what happens to that kid when he goes home. I hear a lot of yelling from their house and I don't think it's good from any angle in the house-they seem pretty... angry, and he gets that way as well.

I also feel bad because I don't know if he will come back over for a while or not-I was always one of those kids who liked to follow the rules, and I was known as "the tattletale"... sadly, I guess since I'm still a bit immature in a lot of ways, I feel like the tattletale and actually wonder if this 8 year old kid things badly of me for it, lol. I have to remind myself I'm the mom, but it sure as heck doesn't feel that way sometimes I just can't let them see that.

I felt really bad-my emotional maturity is quite sad, lol and socially I relate to children a LOT better than I can people my own age in RL, so I was kind of sad about it too, lol-it was like she made my friend go home as well XD

You did the right thing, and he should forgive you even if he is upset very quickly! 8 year olds don't hold a grudge for long when a playdate is at stake, besides they are used to having their life completely run by adults, your telling him should not seem at all odd.

If he does not come over in a few days, see if your son wants to call on him, that may draw him back out!