Made the mistake of reading the parent's forum

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ASDMommyASDKid
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15 Feb 2015, 4:38 pm

ominous wrote:

mistersprinkles - I appreciated your support. I'm trying to figure out how to delete my op if that's possible because I should have gone with my gut and not posted in a parent's forum at all. Olive's very harsh and over the top reaction to me was extremely upsetting, and it has resulted in this thread being all about Olive (which I think she might enjoy). She has been very rude to a number of people directly from what I can see when looking through her posts from the last four days or so; whereas apparently I have been rude to everyone equally. Supposedly. Just by saying what I feel and not personally attacking anybody. These posts are are exactly what I meant by labourious. I guess asking for no labourious comments was a bit idiotic of me to do.

Everybody enjoy picking me apart and talking about how great it is that Olive put me in my place in a thread that I started to meet some like-minded parents where I didn't personally attack anybody.

Jesus crisps.

The conversation has moved to being about OOM because a potential ban was mentioned. Typically this part of the board (I don't really know about the rest of the board) is not moderated with a heavy hand and we manage OK that way, IMO.

In that context, I don't think it is out of place to mention valuing her overall input. It is not meant to be interpreted as an insult to the OP.

ominous
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15 Feb 2015, 4:40 pm

ASDMommyASDKid wrote:

I think the presentation issue is that it is not necessary to share everything you think in an introductory post designed to connect positively with people. All that was needed was to say something like, "Hi, I would like to introduce myself. I am a parent and I have a very positive attitude about ASD and am looking to meet like-minded people. Feel free to post on this thread if you feel that same way."

It is not that it is wrong to say you don't agree with certain things, or that they make you feel bad; It just is not an effective way to communicate if the goal is to focus on positivity and meeting positive people when you strew your own post with negativity.

(Just the opinion of someone whose own communication skills are quite lacking a good deal of the time)

That make sense thank you for a positive and helpful post. The first one that's actually critiqued what I said without making me feel like I'm useless here. I appreciate that. I didn't intend to 'strew my own post with negativity' but was having a bad reaction to the threads I read. I have since, in the thread here, talked about that in response to kraftie, somewhere back on page two of 'let's pick this new one apart'. I am definitely done posting in the parent forums for now, but didn't want to leave it without actually reading and responding to the nicer folks here.

Waterfalls
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15 Feb 2015, 4:40 pm

It seems to me while the OP didn't come off that well, people took her as saying we don't accept our children and that's what's sad here. I didn't read it that way, to me she likes her way, it works better for her, I didn't read judgment of others, more judgment of the world's effect on kids.

It IS sad to read "should I medicate my 7 year old" or about a teen or younger child who is suicidal. We don't make our children miserable, at least I hope not, but many times, the world reaches into their minds and messes up their beautiful perfect minds, assaults their precious bodies, and a lot of misery ensues.

ominous
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15 Feb 2015, 4:41 pm

ASDMommyASDKid wrote:

Well good for you determining it's a great place to discuss how awesome the person is who attacked me personally here, violating the rules and alienating me from my own thread. Y'all enjoy that.

ominous
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15 Feb 2015, 4:42 pm

Waterfalls wrote:

It IS sad to read "should I medicate my 7 year old" or about a teen or younger child who is suicidal. We don't make our children miserable, at least I hope not, but many times, the world reaches into their minds and messes up their beautiful perfect minds, assaults their precious bodies, and a lot of misery ensues.

THANK YOU FOR GETTING IT.

InThisTogether
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15 Feb 2015, 4:49 pm

mistersprinkles wrote:

OliveOilMom wrote:

Booyakasha wrote:

OliveOilMum, you've been reported quite a few times today. Please, tone it down a bit and/or better not post if under a stress or having some issues.

Considering I didn't know I had been reported, I had just continued to post.

Don't worry, I'll stop posting because I've noticed that lately the forum has just become a whinefest. I'm sure I'm "triggering" someone, or doing something "discriminatory" or some other such BS.

I'd rather find a forum where I can post with other adults, not grammar school playground monitors.

You all really just deserve each other here.

I feel SO sorry for your ASD kids. Seriously. What a terrible way to grow up. You literally have no empathy or understanding of ASD people whatsoever do you?

OMG. Let the assumptions fly!

Although OliveOilMom is a mom, she has no ASD kids. She is on the spectrum herself.

Seriously, you owe an apology. I realize you didn't know the background of the person you were addressing, but that was inappropriate and hurtful, to say the very least.

Perhaps this has already been addressed, in which case, I apologize, but if not, really, that was not fair at all.

Mistersprinkles, in the future, you may find it helpful to look at how long someone has been around and how many posts they have logged. It might prevent you from making the mistake you just made. Perhaps not, but it might make you slow down a bit before you post. I am not saying that people who have been here longer are somehow better, but if someone has been around for years and has made thousands of posts, it might be reason to pause and realize they may have some degree of experience, knowledge or input. Plus, they have stuck it out for a long time, which is something on most of these forums.

_________________
Mom to 2 exceptional atypical kids
Long BAP lineage

YippySkippy
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15 Feb 2015, 4:58 pm

This whole thread is a train to Crazytown. :lol:

Fitzi
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15 Feb 2015, 5:00 pm

YippySkippy wrote:

This whole thread is a train to Crazytown. :lol:

Yep.

Waterfalls
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15 Feb 2015, 5:00 pm

ominous wrote:

Waterfalls wrote:

THANK YOU FOR GETTING IT.

I just feel like your point is getting lost in arguments about how you said it.....and you're still right. It shouldn't matter who is offended by how you communicated your point, it's still a valid one. Some of the stuff our kids, and we, go through, it's just really very sad and disheartening. And we all want so much for our children to be ok. To be happy, and healthy, and find acceptance.....and maybe even friendship and maybe even love beyond our own that we give them. That stuff is really hard to create, for me anyway.

I'm interested in what you were looking for others to talk about? Or if you don't want to go there, I think you can ask in the moderator help thread for them to lock this. Or set it so you are no longer notified of responses.

androbot01
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