Kids say the darndest things

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My boy, who just turned 5 last week, made up a poem for the spiders on the ceiling of the shower:

Two creepy spiders sitting in a web.
One fell out and now he's dead!

When I was about 3 or so I told my mom I was going to mutiny against her. My dad was a Marine so I suppose I picked up the word from him.

This week my son's quote was:

"I just want to be social hermit"

Makes me so sad for him.

Don't be too sad. Some of us end up enjoying being semi-hermits (or just plain hermits, for that matter).

Mister Edison: "MommyIwannadotheCubScouts sotheycanteachmetoshootabow sothenIcanthenIcanthenIcan go hunting for youandwecanmove backUpriver (the Monongahela flows north, so we call where the family's at in West Virginia "Upriver") andwecanjustseemycousins..."

And he runs off, very earnestly, to his bedroom to practice target shooting with the toy bow-and-arrow set (the kind with suction cups).

I swear, I'm not TRYING to turn him into a survival farmer. It just runs in the family...

I gotta grow a set of balls and call the local Cub Scout pack.

I don't think it's related to his condition, more to his age, but my son calls knitting "niddling".

I was walking to the supermarket with my 3 yr old son the other day and a teenage boy was riding past doing wheelie on his bike as the boys around here tend to do to show off a bit. My son pointed at him and loudly shouted 'look mummy that boy is silly - he thinks he's riding a unicycle!'
He also frequently asks me why women with short hair (or 'men' as he calls them) are in the ladies toilet!

Last night in the car my son said, "Mommy, you ran a red light. I have to call the police." Then he shouted, "POLICE! COME GET MY MOMMY!"

^ this reminds me of my daughter when she was young. Wish you could post a sound recording of your son's voice saying that.

I'm just curious how many of you have kids who repeat the financial messages at the end of PBS shows. "Sesame street was brought to you by the coorporation for public broadcasting, and viewers like you!" not sure what the latest one is, but I've heard variations on that from several kids.

My 7 yr old daughter has Aspergers and of calls myself, the teachers or well anyone that makes her mad, "big stupid meanines". She's always been quite verbal even though her verbal skills were a bit delayed (I have 3 girls and no boys but, my other two girls both were speaking quite well by 3 years old where as Miranda (my 7 yr old) didn't really start speaking more than one or two word phrases until she was almost 4)

But, now at 7 years old, she of course gets in trouble for this especially at school. So, while I'm sure your very grateful to hear him speak, saying thinks like "jerk" may well get him into trouble later. I use social stories and a lot of re-enactment to help Miranda understand that calling ppl names isn't nice. I also read somewhere that a lot of autistic verbal kids will curse horribly and a really good way to deal with that is to teach them alternate words to use in leu of the curse word. For example, instead of saying, "what the hell?!" In front of my kids, I now say, "what the Hello Kitty!" Kinda like the commercial for orbit gum where they saying, " shut the front door, French toast" and various others instead of some quite nasty curse words.

My kids have actually really started to like those funny words instead of enjoying ruffling my feathers with the ugly ones (which I've found all kids autistic or not enjoy doing lol). But, I can totally get how even hearing the word "jerk" from your 3 yr old would be quite exciting. It shows he's listening and just the verbalizing in and if itself is probably quite amazing.

So before my now 7 yr old was dx'd we had moved to a new town to be closer to my husband's family. We moved to far south Texas very close to the Texas/Mexico border in 2010. So, as you can imagine, my sisters in law had to point out the safe and non safe places to ensure I didn't get my big mouth into big trouble here. Well apparently, one of my sis in laws had mentioned (I front of my then 4 yr old Aspie daughter) that a man was seen getting the "hell" beat out of him "there" as we passed by a park closer to downtown Harlingen. So me and my nieces and my lil Aspie girl were in the car and drove by this same park a few days later when out of no where I hear in the back seat, " isn't that were that guy got the "hell" beat out of him momma?" My two young nieces just about peed on themselves laughing and I of course, while it was very difficult and I felt like someone trying to do a very funny scene in a movie without causing a retake from my laughing hysterically, told them it wasn't funny (yeah right it was SO flipping funny) and I told Miranda that wasn't a nice word where did she hear that (not remembering the previous convo with my sis in law) and she of course replies, "from you and Tia (Spanish for aunt) don't you remember?! She showed you the bad park where they beat the hell out of guys and no one stops them!"

I like to have died right then and there as my two nieces turned to look at me with tears welling up and my cheeks turning red from trying so hard not to laugh and they started laughing even harder. Needless to say, after that anytime someone would say any curse words at all, I was quick to say, "you mean they beat the Hello Kitty out of that guy?!" Or similar lol. My kids now repeatedly say, "what the Hello Kitty" but, I guess it's better than the alternative.

I'm told that at the delightful age of 3 I flipped off and cussed out a driver who was weaving in and out of traffic.

I'm also told that the dear man had his window rolled down and heard me loud and clear!

I love this thread - did all the kids stop saying cute things?

Yeah...we gotta revive this thread!! !! !!

Okay. My son, who's 5, was sitting in the car with me waiting on someone. It was dark and late at night. He got bored and took off his shoes and said, "Mommy, can I throw my shoes out of the window?" I said, "No." He asked why not, and I was too sleepy to bother with it, so I said, "Because the windows are rolled up." So a couple of minutes pass in silence, then, "Mommy, can you roll down the windows?"

He's cute!