Parents with more than one ASD child....where are you?

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We found out last December that our now 5 year old is ASD and now today we found out that our almost 4 year old is as well. I'm so overwhelmed with this information. I know it doesn't change the kids that they are. I guess it's the idea that I now know that I have not one, but two little ones that are special needs.

It does run in families. We have several members with more than one child on the spectrum. I can understand that it must be a bit overwhelming.

PS - I recommend being more obtuse in your signature ... this is a very public forum, and your family can be easily indentified by the information there. Its just a safety issue.

My two step-sons are on the spectrum. Their half-brother is currently going through assessments. Their mother has AS, my partner has AS, and I have AS. It's a wacky house when we're all together!

Another here!

Don't know yet, but I have a 6 year old daughter with AS and am expecting a son next month. And yes, I did get pregnant on purpose after my daughter's diagnosis. Since I got pregnant, I've had a lot of people ask me "what if the new baby has the same types of issues?". My response has been "Well that would sure make things a lot easier!". I know this may sound odd...but when I really think about it...we have a well established daily schedule, things in our house are modified to reduce sensory input problems, we are used to explaining reasons for everything, all objects "places" are labeled, an hour or more is planned for every meal so food can be organized before eating...ie our whole household is run to be Aspie friendly. I honestly think it may be easier to have another Aspie than to try modify everything so that the house is equally Aspie/NT friendly:)

I guess I also look at it from the standpoint that EVERY child, ASD or NT, is going to have their own personality and their own challenges. I have an NT stepdaughter, and honestly she is a lot harder to deal with than my little Aspie...she knows how to lie and manipulate (something my Aspie is not capable of), as a teenager, her whole life can be turned upside down because a "friend" is having a problem (I imagine my Aspie would just avoid such emotionally charged encounters at that age), the NT has emotional collapses for no apparent reason (Aspie just needs less noise, or had an unscheduled change)...

Plus we have WAY more leverage with the schools to make adjustments for my Aspie's learning style and for accomodations around sensory things, etc. When my NT stepdaughter is having issues, the answer is "she's going to have to deal with it" and that's the end of the discussion. While an IEP is not a fun process, we do get a lot more legal leverage and support from the community and school to adjust the environment to fit our children's needs.

So I guess what I'm saying is...it's all a matter of perspective. Sure you could look at having multiple special needs kids as a burden, but you can also look at it as a blessing:)

Both of my twin sons are dxed ASD. At times it is very challenging, especially when both of them have different needs and they conflict with each other, or when I have just helped one of them through a meltdown and the other starts to go, and I am at the school quite a bit between the two of them. It does take a lot of extra patience and energy sometimes.

But there are times when it actually seems easier this way. They share many similar interests (this afternoon they had a holiday from school and played together quietly for most of the day!), and it is as easy to tailor our home environment, outings etc. to two Aspie kids as it would be to one. The experience we gain and the reading we do helps with both our kids. I often think it most be challenging to have to switch back and forth between NT mode and AS mode when parenting very different kids, or to compromise when dividing time between kids with radically different needs and interests. In our house we all need it quiet, we all need plenty of downtime, and we all really enjoy our solitary pursuits, so it is pretty easy for us all to thrive in the same environment. There are definitely positives as well as the additional challenges.

I have three boys ages 14, 11 and 9 with AS.

I am, my wife is and my daughter is on the spectrum. I'm pretty sure that my mother, my grandpa, my wife father are on the spectrum and both my father and my wife mother have aspie-trait. I have an aspie uncle and 2 aspie cousins.

We are waiting for the second child. I hope he will be on the spectrum (not severly-just Aspie) because being us 3 on the spectrum will be easier for us and for him.

I am diagnosed on the spectrum as are my 5 children....genetics are a wonderful thing!

I havent been here in ages but I am a DXed Aspie as is my 17 year old daughter and 7 year old son. I also have a 4 1/2 year old Autistic Daughter. My Psychiatrist just told me the other day that they are doing away with the Asperger's diagnosis and we will soon all just be Autistic. The only main difference between my kids is that my younger Daughter had serious speech delays but she is now speaking well, Id say at about a 1 1/2 to 2 year old level. We have found that there are many family member who have many Autistic traits and some that we would consider Aspie. I feel that it is very genetic and that it just manifests itself in different ways. Some of us are obviously (to the outside world) Autistic and some only to those who know us well. We call my husband the Halfspie because he has so many traits of Autism but none of the social problems associated with it.
The best advice I would give is read all of Temple Grandin's books, or look her up on youtube for understanding and love your kids for who they are.

My oldest child makes straight A's and has been student body president in a small Christian school. She passes for normal but I'd say she is on the spectrum but very high functioning like me.
My two boys are dx as aspies.
My youngest daughter is extremely developmentally delayed but shows STRONG signs of being an aspie.
Her dx is Educably mentally disabled but she has fabric preferences, obsessions, and other similar tendencies.
Life is definitely an adventure for us.

Mmm looks as though genetics is featuring very strongly in this thread!!

I would like to add that although my mum, dad and grandmother have never been diagnosed, there is NO doubt in my mind whatsoever of where I inherit autism and ADHD from!!....all THREE!! But will they ever be diagnosed? No .....but when Alzheimers comes knocking at their doors it won't be TRUE Alzheimers....it will just be geriatric autistics with burnt out hippocampus!! Have you ever known anyone suffering with Alzheimers survive 18yrs?? My granny did and died eventually of renal failure!! Caused by DIABETES!

Genetics, genetics genetics.......I am proud to be on the spectrum and to share the experience with ALL my kids!! It's great when you know you are on the spectrum, we are very very special individuals. Embrace it, learn about it and ENJOY IT! It's a buzz when you know what it's all about!.....AND I learnt the hard way!