How can I deter my son from hands in pants?

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MandySue
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16 Apr 2010, 7:26 pm

My 9 year old is.... putting his hands in his pants alot lately. He has autism, but is verbal and on the mild to moderate end of the spectrum. I know that this is normal to some extent, but lately it's becoming a problem. He isn't doing it in a sexual manner, it just feels good. How can I deter this behaviour? I usually say "hands out of pants" and he removes his hand, but will quickly go back to his pants again... almost like a stim.

any ideas on how to deter this? Discussing WHY isn't working....



CockneyRebel
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16 Apr 2010, 7:38 pm

How about a reward system. If he keeps his hands out of his pants, you can reward him with supper at McDonald's, or Burger King. :idea:


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jc6chan
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16 Apr 2010, 7:38 pm

I used to put my hands in my pants too. I think I stopped in grade 6 after some classmate caught me doing it and started telling everyone. So maybe you can tell your son that his classmates would see it. Or maybe he doesn't understand the concept of acting weird in public? If thats the case, then I can't think of anything else at the moment.



Willard
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16 Apr 2010, 8:59 pm

Get him some false hands to which you can attach clips and hang them on the edges of his pants pockets, so it looks as though his hands are resting calmly at his sides all the time. Then he can be himself and do whatever he likes. :P



AspieCat
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16 Apr 2010, 9:45 pm

Quote:
My 9 year old is.... putting his hands in his pants alot lately. He has autism, but is verbal and on the mild to moderate end of the spectrum. I know that this is normal to some extent, but lately it's becoming a problem. He isn't doing it in a sexual manner, it just feels good. How can I deter this behaviour? I usually say "hands out of pants" and he removes his hand, but will quickly go back to his pants again... almost like a stim.

any ideas on how to deter this? Discussing WHY isn't working....


Not long ago, we had a different problem...but I believe the solution my help if applied. My son pulled some hair out, due to a major stressful situation. He is fine now. But at the time - yeesh. Anyways, what I tried to do, was NOT to mention it. Because, if anyone over hears, it could be embarrassing, fears...or whatever. What I did do was to gently take his hand and put it down from his head. (the first time I did this I said no, quietly then said nothing) I also spoke with his doctor and the school, since Trichotillomania (hair-pulling disorder) is something which should not be left alone.

It took about a month or a bit more, being consistant, but it did work. I also tried to have something around like silly putty, or a stress ball for his hands. Putting something into the hands keeps his hands busy and he is distracted.

I know it is not the exact same as yours, but the solution might be. Good luck! I hope it works.



Tracker
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16 Apr 2010, 9:56 pm

Do his pants have pockets? If he simply likes the feeling of having his hand tucked into his pants then pockets serve that function just fine. You might want to get him pants with pockets, and then tell him to use the pockets instead.



DW_a_mom
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16 Apr 2010, 9:58 pm

When my son was in preschool all the moms had little games that required hands to be kept out of pants. We rarely said, "hands out of pants," just played the games, "hey, honey, lets see how long we can keep our arms straight up!" "Sweetie, can you carry this for me? Two hands, please!"

The preschool teacher had a rule that a boy had to go wash his hands every time they had been in their pants.

Yeah, this issue is quite common for 2 - 4 year old boys; less so at your son's age, but AS kids do everything on their own unique time schedule. I think similar approaches updated for his age would be the way to go.


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psychohist
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17 Apr 2010, 12:30 am

I used to put my fingers in my pants. It was somewhere to put them, and it kept them warm.

Tracker wrote:
Do his pants have pockets? If he simply likes the feeling of having his hand tucked into his pants then pockets serve that function just fine. You might want to get him pants with pockets, and then tell him to use the pockets instead.

Agreed. And we're talking comfy pockets as are found in traditional trousers, preferably with comfy spacious pleats; the "pockets" in jeans do not count. Also, have the waist bands taken in so the waist fits snugly.

If he's going to be a Marine, you can give him gloves instead, as Marines don't approve of "Army gloves" (pockets).



Caitlin
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18 Apr 2010, 11:31 pm

Just a possibility - could your son be experiencing sensory issues with his underwear? It may be just that his hands feel good in his pants, but you might want to ask if his underwear is bugging him in any way. My son (6) went through a major hands in pants phase - which his teacher humiliated him for - and which I figured out was because his underwear was rubbing on his penis. That made it erect, which of couse made it rub even more and be even more uncomfortable, to the point where he became anxious that it was going to pop right out of that ridiculous little hole they insist on putting into boys underwear. He kept putting his hands down there to push his penis down - which made it even worse. We switched underwear (took us a few tries with different brands and styles) and once we found the right type/size, he completely stopped.

Just something to consider :)


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