Wonder if my decision is right or wrong?
My son is 6,5 years n just recently diagnose with AS. During his school days in his private school, he got a lot of bullies from the other kids in his class. It happen almost every day. He hate his school n his classmate n always said that all of his friend hate him or didn't like him. He also complain that the school is boring. So, we decide to withdraw him from his school n doing online school at home now. He enjoy it very much but what concern me is the social development with his peers. He doesn't have any friend. He love to have friend but doesn't know how to make one. I just wonder if our decision is right or wrong to withdraw him from his current school. Cause with he doing online school the opportunity to meet other kids his age is limited.
By withdrawing him, you are doing wonders for his mind early in life.
Perhaps ask around for other autistic people, sons of other parents? That way your sons introduction into a social medium is gentler and not as abrasive.
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Do. I stayed in the same school where I wasn't liked and most people didn't speak to me, and I didn't change their mindsets. Those who spoke to me after I changed were those who were nice and didn't go out all the way to ignore me in the first place. If it hadn't been for them I would have been better off in another school, less materialistic, less showy-off, and funnier and simpler. In the meantime you can help him to overcome part of his issues. But it must come from within too.
oh, I forgot to tell u guys that my son is in 6 grade now n hopefully by this Sept he will be enroll in Junior High. That's one of the reason we enroll him to the online school. Because in where we are living now, there is none school for the gifted child. My son have a superior high IQ n got bored with his current class. He start to make trouble in his class when he get bored n it happen all the time. That cause him to get detention all the time. He start to make excuses when we woke him up in the morning. Every morning is like a war game for us to get him to go to his class. And whenever I pick him up from his class I saw him crying alone on his chair. When I asked the teacher they all just say its nothing special, its usually happen to the kids. He keep asking me when he can stop going to his school. I wonder if I take him to the karate lesson, will it help him to socialize with his peers? I mean to compensate the lack of school socialize.
motherofson
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Homeschool him to challenge him and then find something he is interested in that may have a club, or has you said, maybe even the karate class, to sign him up for. If he can do something he is interested in, he will find others there interested in the same thing and socializing happens!
Just be very thankful you can homeschool him, I've talked to many that have two income homes and no parent home to homeschool them.
Keep him in the decision making, that seems to help.
DenvrDave
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If you find a good karate school, it can be an excellent socialization experience. Not all karate schools are the same, so look around. Also, there must be other ways for your son to socialize. Perhaps volunteering at a charitable organization? Boy scouts? Recreation centers?
leejosepho
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You certainly do not want to isolate him, but do not be deceived by people who say home-schooled children never learn socialization. In fact, they often do far better than children raised in government (aka "public") schools. My daughters are in touch with other home-schoolers, and my grandchildren get plenty of socialization.
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If you find a good karate school, it can be an excellent socialization experience. Not all karate schools are the same, so look around. Also, there must be other ways for your son to socialize. Perhaps volunteering at a charitable organization? Boy scouts? Recreation centers?
agreed. I'd find groups he'd be interested in. What are his favorite subjects?
CockneyRebel
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Thank u all for ur supporting word, it make my day brighten now
I will start searching the karate school n hopefully my son will enjoy it n have a lot of fun. Actually karate is not my son interest. I just want to equip him with the martial art for self defend purpose so he can defend himself when someone bully him.
His interest is science n astronomy. He can talk about outer space for hours and hours nonstop until somebody stop him
But unfortunately where I live now there is nothing like science club or astronomy club that my son can join. Currently we are living in Middle East where the facilities is so minim.
@motherofson, Yes, I know that I'm so bless that I can home school my son. I give thanks everyday for that blessing.
LadyMacbeth
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It's also an easier form of socialising than just hanging around in a playground at lunchtime. I know I didn't know what to say to people to start being friends with them. I managed to chat away with children in swimming club though. It gives you a reason to be there, and a shared topic to talk about without having to find out first.
I did judo for a while, but quit due to physical reasons rather than anything else - I was tall, but light, so I would either have to fight with 7 year olds (I was 11 at the time) who were a lot shorter, or kids my own age who were a fair chunk heavier. Just didn't work out. Had a lot of fun though.
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When I was younger, I hated my school. And now that I am an adult, I still believe forcing me to interact with all those horrible little sadists was the worse thing my parents and teachers could have done.
However, I was not nearly that young when the problems really started, and at his age, that was the best time of my life. If he is seriously that miserable, you should definitely listen, but also ask him what he means when he says no one likes him-- remember, he does not see social situations like you might, and so he will describe them in ways that might not be how they first sound.
It's still important that young children learn to interact with other children. They need to learn coping skills that parents just wont be able to instill. If the school actually is a problem, try arranging play dates, and trips to a playground or some fun center, so that he can interact with other kids. Let him meet other children in a way that does not conflict with his education, so he can learn social skills at his own pace.
I really dont know that much about how a home-school environment will affect kids in the long run. If you decide to put him back into a regular school, he will definitely need a smaller class, at least in respect to his learning needs. A smaller environment is also less hostile, socially.
[Edit]
I just read that he's in 6th grade? I thought you said he was 6 years old at first lol. That's a bit different.
As I said, arrange social situations where he can do that on his terms. Libraries, book and hobby stores, different fun centers; etc. At that age, I got along with adults better than children; if he does, go ahead and encourage it. Find him some mentors, or teenagers that might relate to him in some way.
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