Parents who have had/have a 2yr. old.

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This isn't really related to ASD's but I thought I'd post the question here since this is the parents board and perhaps you have or have had an NT or AS child who's now 2 or was 2 before (and can remember that age well). I was chatting with my cousin and she talked about her daughter who's turning 2 today. Since they had just had another baby a month ago the cousin didn't want to push toilet training on her so she didn't and the 2 yr. old has just moved into her own room. Also she says Mom/Mommy but calls Daddy by his name Joe! Also she loves music and sings but you can't understand what she's saying (or so her mom says). Now compare this to my nephew GOING ON 3! Talk clear Aunt Brandy etc. Knows and jokingly uses his mom/dads real names has names for every one Grandpa,Grandma etc. potty trained (loves his Disney/Spider-man underwear is very verbal and talkative and doesn't seem behind in any way shape or form. Obviously most kids develop differently but to see my nephew then hear of my cousins 2 yr. old just WOW! So how is/was your 2yr. old development wise (NT and AS both are fine obviously AS is going to be totally different so both perspectives seem fine but as I said I guess some kids develop differently.)

None of my kids are NT but they don't all have ASDs.

Each one was very different. My first son was constantly overstimulated. His language development was a bit sluggish but he wasn't really delayed. He started to potty train when he was two but after his brother was born didn't want anything to do with it. At 3.5 he decided he was done with diapers, day and night, and never had an accident. Middle son seemed really easy, and was very socially connected (his Asperger's symptoms didn't start until later). He potty trained at about 2.5 but it was a slow process with lots of accidents. When my third was born he regressed a little, but not that much. My littlest didn't speak until he was 5 but potty trained around the age of three. He had accidents, but not tons of them.

I don't think it's unusual for kids to go through a phase where they call adults by their first name. That's what they hear so it makes sense. I think my second did that for a while.

None of that sounds particularly unusual to me, although they might want to keep an eye on the talking issue.

Nothing sounds out of the ordinary to me, and I have three kids age 19 months to 5, so I don't have to remember very far back! The experts don't recommend STARTING potty training until 18 months anyway, so the fact that 6 months later, she's not potty trained is not a concern at all. Lots of kids aren't fully trained even at 3. My NT daughter potty trained around 2 and a half, if I recall, although she used the potty here and there from 16 months onward. But she didn't choose to use the potty consistently until quite a lot later -- it was more of a fun thing to do occasionally when she was smaller. My son (PDD-NOS) is 3.5 and is just now in the process of potty training (mostly pee trained, not so lucky with poop!). I don't expect my youngest son (NT) to be potty trained at 2, either, although obviously boys are generally slow to potty train. He enjoys sitting on the potty in his diaper, but that's about it.

Also, kids develop A LOT between 2 and 3. Your niece may very well be as grown-up as your nephew by the time she is 3. They really do develop a lot both verbally and socially that year. With both my NT daughter and my ASD son, the strides they made that year were HUGE. DD went from speaking in 3- to 5-word sentences to being able to tell you at length how the various systems of the body work, or accurately synopsize a movie for you. DS went from using one word to speaking in 5-word sentences (although I still can't understand a lot of what he says, and he's been referred to a speech therapist) and being able to be reasoned with (sometimes, LOL!). My littlest guy, who's going on 2, has only put two words together once and really doesn't have a LOT of words, but falls within the normal range and is a very gregarious child (big-time high-five slapper and hugger) with no signs of ASD other than his lack of loquacity.

As for calling parents by first names, both of my older kids have gone through this phase. I think they think our first names are our secret identities and they get some sort of delight out of knowing the names and using them. My son has never called me by my first name but he uses his dad's quite often (probably because he hears it used more often, whereas everyone calls me Mommy). My daughter will use our names when she wants to get our attention. I think this is pretty normal and a lot of kids go through that phase. HTH!

My son who is almost 5 (ASD) did not get potty trained until he was 4. Two of my best friends who have kids exactly one year younger than my son (one a boy, and one has a girl) They both got potty trained right at 3 yrs old. I think they are more emotionally ready at 3, although it doesn't hurt to start trying at 2.5.

My ASD son's language development was so different, it is hard to to tell. He was pronouncing 4 and 5 syllable words at 18 months and labeling everything in the house. However, the only language he used appropriately was to say that he wanted more food or drink! His language improved a lot between 2 and 3.

One of my friends has a little girl that just turned 2 on April 30th. She has not even begun to potty train. She still drinks from a bottle. My friend did start taking her to a speech therapist because she was not eating solid foods at 16 mos. old. They found that her tongue was not moving around in her mouth the way it should. She did not have near as many words as my son had at that age, and from what I can see she seems NT. Anyway, once they started working with her eating issues, she started saying more words. She is saying a lot of words now, but if she says more than 3 words, it is hard to understand her. I have been keeping my eye on her, but she seems to be sharing interests and joining in with the other kids, so I am not that worried. She just seems a little behind where her sister was at that age.

I think as long as a child is trying to talk, that is what is important. I would keep my eye on it though and see if she is actually trying to communicate purposefully or if she is just repeating words that she hears. I wouldn't worry about the potty training just yet.

Good luck!