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jdcaldwell
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24 May 2010, 5:34 pm

Okay, so as if the end of the school year isn't enough for a 6 year old with AS (which believe me, it is enough) We are going to be moving in a few weeks, not only to another house, but also to another town, which means next year he will be in a new school, with new kids, but I'm getting a little ahead of myself.

Is there anyone out there who has any tips on preparing/handling this situation to make it as untraumatic as possible?

I know it's going to be hard on him, but anything I can do to make it easier would help.

Oh! Also, any tips for summer break you want to throw in would be super awesome as well!

Thanks for your time!!



willaful
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24 May 2010, 6:02 pm

I think anything you could do help him get familiar with the change before the move would help. I'd suggest taking him to visit the new neighborhood and school beforehand, but I guess if it's in another town it's not that practical. Maybe you can show it to him with google maps? Take pictures and make them into a little book, maybe with a social story?


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angelbear
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24 May 2010, 6:08 pm

Good ideas from Willaful. All I can say is that talking about things before hand does seem to help my son.



liloleme
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24 May 2010, 8:16 pm

We are also moving in August with our Autie and Aspie....to a complete other country. My husband is French and he got a Professors position. I have been reading a lot about moving your autistic child and one of the things that we are going to attempt is to have things in the new house already there before bringing them, that are familiar to them. Like we got a swing that is just like their swing from IKEA and my husband took it to give to his parents the last time he went. We are shipping their toys and other sensory equipment and bringing our animals. We have also looked into the school and the services for Autism in the area that we will be living. Also I plan to go back to using schedules for awhile until they get regulated....and last but not least, a very involved social story and lots and lots of verbal prep! My kids NEED to know what comes next.



jat
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24 May 2010, 8:53 pm

If the school is at all cooperative, you may be able to visit the school and meet the new teacher(s) before school starts. Even if it's just a couple of days early (during teacher prep days), it can make a world of difference. My grandson has been able to do this not only when he switched schools, but even when he was just going to be in a new classroom with a new teacher. His anxiety about the changes is so high, that he really needs to be able to meet the teacher and see the new space separately from the crush of "first day."

Since it sounds like you're going to be moving at the beginning of the summer, so you'll be in your new town during the summer, you may be able to meet some of the families in your son's new school through some local community events and outings (to parks, libraries, etc). Maybe the school would be willing to give you the names of some of the children who will be in your son's grade and who live near you (with their permission, of course). Some libraries and bookstores have story time, when they read to children; some playgrounds have events for children; if you are religiously inclined, your house of worship may provide you with a point of contact for meeting other families with children close in age to yours.

If you haven't done so yet, you may want to find out if there is an online "community" in your new town, where you could start to find out about resources.



liloleme
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24 May 2010, 9:21 pm

Thats a good idea too Jat. The Autism people in France told us that we dont have to start our kids on the first day and that they can visit first. Also they will have a modified school day as in France they have longer school days than they do here. It always made me feel better to feel things out and meet my teacher before school. When I was in school they had what was called an "open house" before school started.....now "open house" is after school has started, which is very silly!



PenguinMom
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25 May 2010, 5:14 am

I would also be interested in suggestions. We will be moving soon from a very very urban environment to a very very rural one.

I think the move will be good for both my girls, but I am stymied as to how to make the transition smooth.

Best of luck to all of you making these big life changes!



jdcaldwell
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25 May 2010, 2:41 pm

Awesome suggestions everyone!
The town we're moving to is only a half an hour away from where we are, so I've already driven past the house a couple of times with him, and I've talked to the special ed. director here and she's going to see if he can be enrolled in a "summer school" program there for the last couple of weeks of summer. I guess they have a special summer program set up for autistic children.

Thank you lilioleme for your suggestion. I wasn't sure if it would be a good idea to let him see the house empty just to get used to it, but it makes sense to have everything in place beforehand rather than get him used to it one way and then change it again.

here's another question, we're moving from a tiny little house on a big lot (about 1/2 an acre) where the kids have lots of room to run and play, and the neighbors can't hear them scream. To a bigger house on a small lot in a neighborhood. My son is a SCREAMER when he's in meltdown mode. I've never lived in a neighborhood before and I'm worried about police being called or something, because it can get really loud. What do you people with neighbors do? is that something I even need to worry about?



DW_a_mom
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25 May 2010, 6:18 pm

On the first question, I like all the ideas already discussed and definitely spend some time on google maps. There is something about a map that helps an AS child feel he has more control over a situation. Well, that is true with my son, anyway. Everywhere we go that is new to him, he's the map guy.

As for the neighbors ... the police haven't shown up on our doorstep yet (my son is now 13 and much less of a screamer than he used to be). I honestly don't know how much they hear, and I have often worried about it, but ... I think the best defense is getting to know them, and allowing them to see how you interact with your child. Also ... don't scream back ;)


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PenguinMom
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25 May 2010, 6:26 pm

I give my downstairs neighbor and my landlady frequent up dates. Just as part of conversation, let them know if any big changes are in store (maybe to expect screaming) or just to let them know what new techniques we're working on.

For the most part my downstairs neighbor is more annoyed when the girls are happily running in the apt. I think when she is screaming in full meltdown mode he recognizes that this is above and beyond what most parents have to deal with.