Probability of having more autistic kids

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Hi Folks,

I am 44 and my wife is 31. We have a 4.5 year old son who has been diagnosed with Autism. We are planing on extending our family. I was wondering if someone can answer some of my questions

Q, Is it true that having one autistic child increases the probability of having a second child with the same affliction? If so, by how much?

Q, Is there a test (DNA etc) me & the wife can take to reveal any pre-disposition to autism?

Q, Are there any forum members with an autistic child but with younger normal siblings?

As you can probably tell, we are scared and confused all at the same time.

Thanks in advance

rogers42

I don't have kids myself, but I know plenty of people do have both NT and autistic kids. I have a close friend who's first child is severely autistic and whose second is developing perfectly normally (now 5 years old).

There was this recent study that I found quite interesting: http://www.iancommunity.org/cs/autism_s ... n_siblings

Many people agree that there is a genetic component to autism, but most also agree that the genetics of autism are so complex that it's difficult to accurately predict what outcome there will be in any given genetic mix. I very strongly agree with Temple Grandin that the world needs all kinds of minds: http://www.ted.com/talks/temple_grandin ... minds.html

Forgive me if this is blunt, but if the subtext of what you are asking is that you're overwhelmed parenting your current child and you want your second to be easier - I'd think very carefully about planning your family. Life doesn't offer guarantees: neurotypical children can be difficult, too, or you could wind up with a child with a completely new and confounding set of challenges. However, there are families out there who have all kinds of collections of different levels of difference, disability, and limitations who lovingly muddle through successfully.

Yes

No

Hopefully someone will chime in.

welcome to wp =)

yes. ive most often seen it quoted as 5% chance the sibling is autistic, depending on the source. there are several parents here that most or all of their children are autistic, however. personally i tend to think that its more likely to be repeated when the child has asperger's or a more typical pattern of development, than in those cases where regression occurs or functioning is severely low. but thats just my own observation from what ive read and families ive read of.



im not sure if there are any available now to look for pre-disposition. there is one that tests your second child if the first has autism, not sure if its even accurate or anything (http://www.arisktest.com).



my SO is autistic, and my two younger sons are biologically his. our 7 yr old is not autistic, and our 4 yr old is, so in this case, the autistic came second. incidentally, my oldest has a lot of autistic traits and gets services through school with an autism eligibility, but i am not autistic nor is his father. i do admit to having a few traits, but my oldest has much more than me, altho more subtle than my youngest son.

one small word of caution, since you are very new to wp and probably havent read much here yet. "affliction" conjures up images of disease and "normal" implies abnormality in our autistic children. thems fighting words around here =) this is an autistic forum after all, even tho many of us here in the parenting section are not.

I don't have the answers to your questions, but I know that there are plenty of members here that have a mix of children. Many of them have multiple children with varying degrees of autism. Some have 3 or 4 children and only one of them is on the spectrum. Some have 3 or 4 children and all of them are on the spectrum to one degree or another. I only have one child, and I had him at 40. He is on the spectrum. I desperately wanted more children, and I tried and tried. Well, I am almost 46 now, so I am afraid the window of opportunity for me has passed. Even with the fear that I may have another autistic child (or a child with other problems at my age) I was still trying up until the age of 44. I think you have to come to terms with whether you are able to take on another child, no matter what the struggles will be. I don't think there is any test at this time to tell you how your child will come out.

Best of luck to you! and Welcome to Wrong Planet!

What affliction? You haven't mentioned an affliction, just autism.

But if you're talking about autism, then, technically, no, but since it seems to run in families, you're more likely to have one. But this kid would be more likely to luck out anyway, regardless of whether or not you already had a kid. So this is an indication that you're more likely to have another, but not the cause thereof. Your age also gives you better odds of having another.



Not yet. Why? Wouldn't you rather be surprised?



Heard of it happening.



Yeah, propaganda will do that to you. But congrats on your first autistic!

Thank you. I stopped myself from saying something similar previously.

Hi Rogers42, I can understand how you and your wife are feeling. I would caution you that you may not find much sympathy here for the kind of language you're using (afflictions, normal, etc) because many of the folks here are autistic, and pretty much done with being made to feel like they are a burden to their families or to society - which I'm sure you didn't mean to imply, but the language you use here can strike those chords in people. Just thought you could use a heads up.

My 7 year old son is autistic - he has Aspergers. His younger brother may or may not end up with a label - at this point I only see some mild sensory issues in him, but you never know.

I would reiterate and reinforce what another poster said - if you are uncertain at this point whether you and your wife can properly provide for your first son's needs, if you bring another child into the family, I would take time and plently of introspection before making this decision. You could have the easiest child in the world, or you could have a child with a far more serious and intensive medical condition the second time around. I am a firm believer that no one (regarless of whether they already have an autistic child) should be having babies unless they are willing to embrace the child they are given, unconditionally.

All that being said... I can tell you this:

First, my older son did not hav a diagnosis when we decided to conceive our second child. Once he did (shortly after my second son's birth) things got chaotic - suddenly we had to immerse ourselves in research, meet with specialists, arrange therapies, etc etc etc. Things calm down after a while, so if your son is recently diagnosed, this may be the wrong time to be making life-altering family decisions. But keep in mind that if we had known about our son's diagnosis earlier, we may not have decided to have our second child. And that would have been regrettable because for us, it has been wonderful having both boys. So give yourselves time to adjust to autism, but don't sell yourselves short on how much you can cope with either. Be realistic in your assessment of your own family's needs and resources.

Second, having a younger brother has been a true blessing for our autistic son (and vice versa). They adore each other, and teach each other profound lessons every day - lessons I am certain they could never learn from me. So, while having a second child will increase the strain on your family and your resources, it also replenishes you in ways that are impossible to measure.

I'm sure I've done nothing but confuse you even more but... such is life

The parents on this show seem to have an almost equal number of NT and autistic children with a total 7 kids in all. This show was about a risk from vaccinations.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YAR1m8G19QM&feature=related[/youtube]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G8qhYdtoeqM&feature=related[/youtube]

It's a tough call and I can understand your concerns. I have 4 children (1 girl & 3 boys in that order), third was dx ADHD at age 3 and is also probable ASD. The three boys all show some traits but only DS2 to a severity that he has a dx and special help.

By the time DS2 was diagnosed DS3 was a few months old but I often think had I known beforehand I might not of had another child (I'm glad that I did of course, he is lovely but I do feel fortunate that he doesn't have the difficulties his brother has).

The choice can only ever be yours and maybe you need to weigh up how much support you have (family, friends, local services) if you were to have another autistic child. Of course you may have a child that is NT or much less affected and in any case children can benefit a lot from having a sibling, autistic or not.

Good luck with your decision.

Before my child was diagnosed, I knew he was "different" and decided not to have another until he was in kindergarten, or possibly never. I got pregnant while on birth control and had the second baby when he was 3. To be honest, it was very difficult for me, maybe mostly because my (now ex) husband didn't help, I was a single married Mom.

Anyway, they're both ASD/ most likely Asperger's.

They are 18 and 21 now. I can't imagine life without Both of them.

I agree, depends on how much financial, social support you have.....

I haven't read the replies, but you will want to go see what is called a Genetic Counselor http://www.genetichealth.com/resources_ ... ling.shtml

We had our first session not long ago, and my family is going in for lab work soon. They also check for FragileX, which shows many characteristics of Autism and most definitely gets passed down.
Good luck to you

I am brand new here. In fact, this is my first post ever. I just wanted to chime in and say that I have 3 children. My oldest daughter (11) is AU - Asperger's. My 9 year old son and 5 year old daughter are both NT.