won't leave boo-boos alone

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I'm thinking about giving her a time-out whenever we catch her picking at a boo-boo. She's got to learn one way or another. Although, doesn't seem to be working with listening.

I always picked my scabs as a kid. I still do as an adult. If my mom put me in time out for picking them, I would just pick them even more out of boredom and frustration. Most of my scab picking WAS a result of boredom. Distraction is what helped me. I fell off a treadmill because I turned it on fullspeed and tried to jump on it while it was going. I hit the concrete so hard I practicaly broke my knee. I didn't, I just scraped it up really bad. I couldn't resist the urge to pick the HUGE scab. It's a miracle it didn't get infected. My picked scabs rarely got infected and my mom figured it was just better to pick her battles. But what really helped was distracting me.

I can't recall if you've posted about this before. They make band-aids that look like tatoos. Have you tried those? The HotWheels ones are a big hit at our house but perhaps they have Barbie or the Disney Princesses or something she might like. If she likes the picture maybe she won't be so quit to pick it off?

Does it help at all if you give her something else to keep her hands busy? Does she have a fidget or manipulative toy she likes that you could use to redirect?

I had a hard time not picking my scabs. I think it may have been a stim for me or a sensory thing. I just liked how it felt despite the pain of picking it. But then I always hated that it bled. It took me years to get self control to not pick at it. I started out with putting band aids over them so I wouldn't have to see it and it be like a owie I had than a scab which is an owie technically.

let me rephrase this for a moment.

"I'm thinking about giving her a time-out whenever we catch her (flapping her hands). She's got to learn one way or another."
"I'm thinking about giving her a time-out whenever we catch her (avoiding eye contact). She's got to learn one way or another."
"I'm thinking about giving her a time-out whenever we catch her (wanting to be alone). She's got to learn one way or another."

before you punish for what could be a stim or compulsory behavior, you should try to figure out the cause and result. compulsive scab picking is a form of dermatillomania (aka skin picking) . like other stims, skin picking is often compulsory, an unconscious behavior, and anxiety reducing. you should find out what your daughter gets from the picking behavior before you decide to punish her for it. you dont have to be asd or ocd to suffer from dermatillomania, either.

if you decide to try to eliminate the behavior, you can do both redirection and prevention. redirect with fidgets or other things to occupy not just her hands but her mind as well, and you may need to find something that is relaxing or stress reducing at the same time. for prevention, simple things like clipping her nails short, wearing restrictive clothing (covers the scabs, prevents hands from getting under the clothing), and a good bandaid. i always suggest nexcare waterproof bandaids, they stick really well (dont bother with the bandaid brand ones that are similar, they suck) and form a seal around all edges so you cant get a fingertip in the side to pick. these do come in the cool tatoo version that bombaloo wrote about. and dont forget one of the most important forms of prevention, preventing the scabs in the first place. if you spent time outdoors or camping, invest in a good powerful bug spray and some stingeze sticks.

there are a few threads here on the parents forum about skin picking, if you do a quick search you should come up with them and be able to get some more ideas.

i have been a compulsive skin picker my whole life. these days i try to keep it from being in openly visible spots. stress is a huge trigger for me, and my current job has been really stressful, so i have spots that havent healed in 5 years. i remember times as a child that i was covered in scabs head to toe, and the horrible aftermath of a flea infestation one summer when i was in my teens left me scarred for years.

we've employed full-time band-aids and time-outs for whenever she picks at them.

Hopefully it helps.

I would suggest getting the flexible/liquid band aid stuff.

I really don't like the typical band aids, and they hardly stay on me for more than an hour. They just don't stretch like skin does, and inevitably start pulling at my skin which makes it uncomfortable and irritates the scab. And of course when something is irritating you, you scratch at it. The flexible band aids fit a lot better and don't cause as much irritation, which reduces the desire to pick at the irritation.

Also, don't worry too much about it. I have had/still have plenty of scars and scabs (some permanent) and it hasn't ruined my life yet. Don't make this into a big battle when it isn't necessary.

I agree with azurecrayon. I've always picked at scabs too but was never given a hard time about it. If my parents put me in a time out I'm certain I would have picked them more out of stress and spite. Out of sight out of mind and distraction tactics are the only things that could have stopped me.

How old is she?

"Hey... why are you being mean to your immune system (body's fix-it crew, insert-cute-euphemism-here) ?! It's working hard and doing a good job by the look of that scab... and you are just ruining all that hard work it is doing for you... now it's going to have to start all over again. (Insert real life incident here where someone disrupted a project of hers that really set her off as a corralative example)"

If she wants to know more about her immune system wonderful. If it doesn't work... I'll work on plan B.

I know, as a kid, I LIKED the feeling of peeling off scabs - the thicker the better. And I always had plenty. But I have altered pain perceptions so I'm not the best example.

My daughter has also started doing this and we are curbing it with 'the scar talk'. I told her it will leave a scar and showed her some of mine - from picking scabs as a kid no less. Then gave her a little lesson in how picking scabs could lead to scars... it's working so far. She's just starting to have some of that girliness popping through. I'm struggling to learn how to deal with it... and use it... ummmm, I mean engage it to best advantage. She is so much more girly that I ever was or ever will be, not that it takes ALOT of girliness to acheive that...

My Mom used the "scar" tactic when my brother and I had chicken pox. It worked on very well on my brother to the point of paranoia. I didn't buy it though. I had a field day picking the things.

I found out about an interesting way of dealing with scabs: hiring security guards that protect unionized workers (just kidding ). But seriously, you get rid of scabs by steaming them off. Take a good-quality paper towel or a wash cloth, soak it in hot water, as hot as you can tolerate, put it over the scab, and hold it in place. When it starts to lose warmth, wring it out, soak it in hot water again, and put it back in the same spot. The scab will soften and slough off as you repeat the process. At the end, your scab should come off completely, leaving an exposed but non-bleeding wound in its place. Disinfect the wound and cover it with a band-aid. A new scab will grow back in a day or so, but it will be thinner and softer than the one you removed. Do the same procedure with new scabs, until the wound heals.

I STILL like the way it feels.

I picked at scabs and still do as well....I also pick at imperfections in my skin...pimples, ect. My daughter got really bad and had holes and terrible scarring all over her legs and arms. Mine is more of a stim and hers was more anxiety charged. We got her to stop with a low dose of celexa and some therapy but I only recommend that in extreme cases like hers. I have some scars but its nothing major. You can leave a band aid on but you dont want to leave it on after a scab forms because then it gets soft and it does not perform its duty. Its ok to pick a scab, they fall off anyway. The only time its bad is if its a deep wound but I always knew my pain level and would leave some alone until they were ready to come off. If she is causing herself to bleed a lot and digging deeper then I would be concerned otherwise, dont make such a big deal of it or it will only cause her to focus more on doing it.