working on a questionnaire .. would like some input

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I've decided to put together a little 'questionnaire' for my daughter. My girl is very bright and I know I have got to get her on board if I am really going to be able to help her deal with stress and her emotions, etc. I'm trying to come of with a questionnaire that would help me understand where she is coming from better, help her to understand the situation more and where she is struggling so that I can help, and help us to come up with some goals and a starting point.

I see a lot of things for parents to fill out on a childs behavior and development but nothing really for the child to give their input on which of these behaviors are actually a problem to them. I believe that if just pick behaviors and things that are a problem to me she will be less likely to work with me than if we choose to work on things that are actually problems for her. And I believe there is a lot overlap there.

She just doesnt talk about things but is very heaving into written and visual etc so I'm thinking maybe this would be an easy way to find out how she feels about things.

So here are a few 'early' ideas on the questionnaire and if anyone has some questions or ideas to add I will post the final copy here for anyone who would like to adapt it and use it as well.

-- Do you often find you are frustrated because others do not understand how you are feeling? True or False
-- Do you sometimes have feelings that are too overwhelming for you to talk to anyone? True or False
-- If there was a secret code word or hand signal that would tell others close to you that you are feeling too many strong emotions and don’t feel that anyone is hearing you, would you use it? Yes or No
-- Do people seem to be suddenly mad at you without warning? Yes or No
-- Do you feel happy some of the time / most of the time / never / always? Circle one
--
And I was thinking of a section with different emotions, etc where she would be asked to describe how her body feels when she is afraid, frustrated, angry, etc
And some open ended questions about what she would like to change in her life.. what goal she would like to set for herself. If she could change one thing about Mom what would it be..

And of course this is just a very early thought so nothing set ijn stone.. just an idea. Any thoughts??

I'm not a parent, but I think that sounds like a good idea. The questions so far, seem good. It's great that you are asking her if she would use a hand signal or code word. I would have loved it if people asked me that type of question when I was younger.

I do think that sounds like a good idea too. One thing to keep in mind though, is a lot of people on the spectrum have difficulty describing their emotions in words (written or verbal), and some of us even have trouble identifying what emotion it is that we are actually feeling at the time. So, your daughter may (or may not) have trouble with that part too.

Hey Littlelilly! Yes I'm aware they may be hard or impossible for her to answer so I plan to space them out and keep them limited. May 5 or 6 randomly dropped in so it does not become overwhelming. But even if she cannot answer those questions, that fact is also important to know too. Some questions are just trying to find things out that cant really be asked... like people suddenly being mad at her is usually bc she didnt notice how frustrated others were getting along the way. That is different than seeing it and continuing anyway. KWIM.. really just want a way to get more info from her in a non stressful way. talking about these things is not easy.

I like these questions. Some are very similar to the questions that my daughter was asked on one of her evaluation questionnaires for Aspergers.

It is funny though. A couple weeks ago, my 11 year old was not feeling well. She was just "not right." She could not describe to me what exactly was wrong. She didn't know if it was a physical feeling or an emotional feeling. She was having the hardest time trying to describe to me what was wrong. I finally asked her: "If you could tell me how you are feeling in a color, what would it be." Without hesitation, she said purple. Now, I have no idea what purple meant, but I thought it was interesting that she related whatever it was she was feeling to something descriptive like a color instead of trying to describe something she didn't understand with something else she didn't understand.

a signal for when she feels someone is doing something unfair.

This might be a one to deter or delay some meltdowns.

I know it's not a questionaire question, but might be an outside idea for you to add to the plans.