New here... Possible AS in my 7 year old son.

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My son is now 7 years old. He was diagnosed as ADHD/ODD and Bipolar when he was 5. He's always had things that make him unlike other kids. Last week, I took him to see a new doc. After 20 mins w/ him, she asked to test him for AS. I've been researching & here's why I'm so confused...
Jay has always had a bad temper. At 6 months, in his walker, when he would get stuck in a doorway or something, he would start bashing his head into the back of it. As he got older, he would get angry and slam his head/face into anything close. That's where the temper started.
Now, he's in 2nd grade. He's constantly having problems in school. He gets frustrated very easily & when he does, he refuses to do anything. He will scream, throw things and it's very hard to calm him down. He's very smart but very easily frustrated.
A few wks ago, the corner of his poptart broke & he went ballistic. He screamed, cried, and stomped for 15 minutes.
He doesn't like loud noises & is easily annoyed by small things, like his sister singing. He hates it & has been known to take extreme measures to get her to stop.
He cant/wont sit still, even for a minute, except on rare occassions. He will play w/ his socks or spin a toy around or pick stuff off the couch/floor/blanket.
I realize this is long, but I didn't know where else to go.

What works for me is observing "mundane" information, sensory deprivation, or decent music (it's easy to be picky about this).

My daughter (classic autism) has serious issues about "broken" food....also how you cut her food. He sounds far more autistic than Bi Polar....my oldest was BP. His anger and frustration issues seem to stem (at least from what you say) mainly from sensory issues.
Also it is very hard for autistic people to ask for help, they basically have to learn to do this. Both my younger kids (9 year old aspergers and my 6 year old autie) have serious issues with this. Even my 19 year old and myself (44) Still struggle with knowing when and how to ask for assistance.

That's merely the tip of the iceberg. For as long as I can remember, cleaning his bedroom has always been a huge fight. I'll tell him to "clean his room" and he will spend hours screaming & crying about how it's to much & too hard. Just today, a friend of mine who has a son w/ AS recommended I give instructions is shorter, smaller terms. First, he picked up the dirty clothes w/in a couple minutes. Next was toys & so on. In under 10 mins, his room was done! No tears, no screaming & no fit!
Another issue from today, hitting. He's been disciplined over & over for hitting but it doesn't seem to help. He will constantly hit his sister & then say he was only playing or even tell me why he did it but not understand why he is in trouble. I'm just so tired. I don't get him & the things he does, so I'm hoping to get a clear diagnosis & some help dealing, if nothing else. Even if it isn't AS, I know my baby isn't "normal".

Someone else here recommended the book "Smart but Scattered" that outlines how you can help your child with executive functioning, just like how you broke down cleaning his room into different tasks. I read it, and it was really insightful and literally outlined plans for different skills. Emotional regulation is also an executive functioning skill, and it outlines plans for that as well.

The hitting his sister and saying he was only playing sounds like my BP son. He was VERY jealous of his sisters as they were the "good" ones and he was always getting into trouble. Also it seemed that lying came very easy for him which is not typical for someone with Aspergers/autism. I do think that my son had some autistic traits but he was primarily Bi polar. Have you ever read the Bi Polar Child? This is an amazing book and it may help you to decide if maybe the diagnosis is wrong or right.
I understand your frustration and I would be happy to help you if you wanted any tips on how to deal with early onset BP issues. I wish I knew then what I know now because I could have helped my son so much more. Unfortunately my son was not properly diagnosed until age 12 and at age 13 he started using drugs. He died a few months ago (in august) at age 24 of an overdose after being clean for 2 years. Not all BP kids grow up to use drugs but there is actually an alarmingly high rate of them that do (we also have addiction in our family from my Fathers side). Your son is still young enough that you can get him the help that he needs so dont give up trying. I never did either but I did not have the tools or understanding that I needed until it was too late.

You can PM me if you want, I have been gone awhile but have been checking in every day for the past week.

This does sound ALOT like my son!

He has been diagnosed with AS a few months ago and I'm still struggling to understand the whole concept. But if this is the case...then things might get much better, because then you can handle him differently that will lead to less meltdowns....My son was also initially diagnosed with ODD....I do think he still has some traids....

What we came to realize was that plenty of his frustration and irritibillity stems from great anxiety, bit of OCD, misreading situations and plenty of Sensory overlaod!

Hang in there....don't think any harm can be done if you start implementing the methods of handling a child with AS.

AS could definitely fit, in which case your son hasn't always had a temper as much as a tendency to melt down, which happens when things get so jumbled in the brain a person can't cope anymore.

I recommend the book written by one of our adult AS members, free for download at ASDStuff.com

The book is still a work in process but provides a compelling look from the inside out. As you said, you wish you could just understand him ... Reading will help. Hopefully you've finally got a direction that will work, and help you find successful strategies.

My son had a lot of trouble learning not to hit his sister, too, btw. I chalk it up to a few things, the first being the very confusing signals society sends about physical contact. We had to go zero tolerance, you don't touch anyone for any reason without specific permission. All the subtleties between taps for attention, slaps between boys in play, et al were beyond him. AND he often felt it was his only tool to defend himself, because his sister never listened to him when he asked nicely (which is true, unfortunately), an adult can't always be roped in fast enough, etc so that had to be dealt with, too, getting him better tools and processes, a long slow road because it all has to broken down for him, and practiced extensively.

If you would like to see a whole bunch of free YouTube videos on autism, neurological issues, psychiatric issues, and learning disabilities, you can check out the "favorities" on my free YouTube Autistic Kids Channel ( www.youtube./user/vids4autkids1 ). Be sure to click "load more" at the bottom of the page to get all of the videos.

I also have several links in the "friends" and "subscriptions" areas to other free helpful YouTube channels.

Also, you can check out the various links to resources on the "autism links" page of my free website, www.freevideosforautistickids.com.

A couple of questions:

The doctor that you are seeing, is he or she a pediatric neurologist or child psychiatrist?

Is the child on meds for ADHD? Stimulants used to treat ADHD sometimes cause irritability in a child with autism who has a lot of anxiety.

I can relate to it being confusing, knowing that your child isn't "normal" but trying to work out what the issues and diagnosis is. Personally I found that reading and research was the best help. At one stage I read Tony Attwood's "Aspergers Syndrome" book and went through with pen and paper and wrote down all the behaviours in the 5-6 broad categories that my child exhibited. That really helped to work out where I thought things were at. It took two rounds of going to psychologists to get an AS diagnosis ... so from that point of view, although psychologists/doctors are professionals, they only see your child for a window of "hours", whereas you see most things about your child over a period of years and know them best. Once you understand conditions and associated behaviours, I think it makes it easier to discuss with professionals and help your child towards a correct diagnosis.

I'm really not sure anymore, as far as the diagnosis. I don't think he hits out of anger & he's never really been one to lie. He often plays around with me & gets too rough. His sister has the tendancy to agitate him & after repetitively asking her to stop, he "loses it". He has gotten so frustrated with her that he's cried on numerous occasions.
He just sat in my front room & lined up a handful of screwdrivers. His sister when to sit by him & I asked her not to mess w/ them. What does she do? She grabs them all, after he's finally got them aligned perfectly, and says she wants to make something. His reaction was not good. I managed to get her attention elsewhere before he could really snap.
I'm going to be making a trip to the library on Monday to look for books on AS & bipolar. I've gotta do something.

I don't know how to PM, so if u can msg me, that would be great. Thanks.

Jay's doc is a pediatrician that specializes is autism/AS, which I wasn't aware of until our visit. Jay is on 2 meds right now, that the previous doc prescribed. One is strattera & the other is risperdol. At this point, it doesn't seem to be helping much.
After he took a voluntary nap today, I asked him why & he said he was tired. I asked if he is tired a lot & he said yes. Sometimes, he said, he has a hard time going to sleep, which explains why we hear him kicking the walls in his room after bedtime. He plays well by himself & loves puzzles. Maybe I'll give him a new puzzle to work on w/ me.

http://www.amazon.com/Child-Adolescent- ... 1572244356

Above is a link to a book on psychiatric meds used with kids that I like a lot because it covers meds used for various disorders and it is easy to understand.

I have also included a link below that provides a vary general overview of which meds are commonly used to treat symptoms associated with autism.

http://autism.healingthresholds.com/therapy/drug

Both links are on the "autism links" page of my free website, www.freevideosforautistickids.com.

Risperidone can cause sleepiness, so I would ask your doc about adjusting the dose. Abilify is a similar drug (atypical antipsychotic) that is more expensive and that some people apparently tolerate better.

My older son tried several different meds before settling on Prozac for day and Clonidine at night, primarily for anxiety and to help with chronic insomnia.

I would also research your drugs very carefully on the net for side effects, dosages, drug interactions, and signs of overmedication and ask your doctor about anything that you feel is not working, including excessive sleepiness. You could also record behaviors and times that meds are given in a log to show the doctor.

There are many different drug combinations and dosages commonly used. Maybe something else would work better. What works depends on the child.

We actually just started a 750 piece puzzle a little bit ago. Both of the kids are very excited. He keeps getting on his sister abut touching the sides, saying she's going to mess it up. I've been watching him more these past few days. When we were counting out the pieces, I would count groups of ten & then lay them down. He would pick them up & move them so that they were in line w/ the other piles & then count them. He did this repetitively after each group of 10.

I did manage to get him to take a bath, simply by telling him that he had to bathe before we began the actual puzzle. Progress! (Usually he throws fits at bath time.)