I had a mama bear outburst

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Had to post this here as I have no one to talk to about this. We had an outing with my 9 yo daughter and 3 of her friends and moms. We were in the car (my daughter hates cars-add to that 8 people cooped up in a minivan and you get a recipe for disaster) and my daughter starts to escalate. It was one of those moments where I knew a meltdown was coming but didn't know what to do, how to stop it, there was no way to calm her down. Anyway, the meltdown became severe and she was lashing and screaming and the other girls became frightened. It was awful! I pulled over and took my daughter out and tried to calm her down but after some time I realized she wasn't going to calm down until we got home so I put her back into the car and drove as fast as I safely could to get us home.

One of the moms, thinking it was cute or funny or I don't know what took out her camera and snapped pictures of the girls plugging their ears from my daughter's screams.

This made me furious! I strongly stated how it was not funny and she should not be documenting this! I was in tears and could barely croak out how mean it was to document others' aversion to my daughter's meltdown. It made me sad and brought full force the realization that others don't get it! They don't get what it would feel like for their own child to be the one everyone wanted to get away from much less what it must be like to be my daughter who would not want to have this episode around these girls she wants to be her friends.

It was very depressing. I held and hugged my daughter extra that night feeling the world doesn't have the capacity for the empathy she needs from people. Maybe that's too dark of a statement, but it was a sad evening. I am just now getting over the depressive feeling of that night 5 days ago.

Thanks for letting me vent.

Oh Mama I am so sorry that you and your daughter had to go through that scene. I honestly cannot imagine what that woman was thinking. I hope you both can put this behind you (((hugs))).

Sweet Pea hugs

I probably would have yanked the camera out of her hands and thrown it on the ground.

Don't invite that heartless mom along on any future excursions. You should also immediately let her know that she doesn't have legal permission to put any pix of your minor aged daughter on line in any way shape or form. If you find out she has done so, have a lawyer send her an official letter telling her all pix of your daughter that she has put up must be taken down or you will file charges of harassment and bullying against her, and that you will sue her. If she ignores the letter, then follow through with the charges and the lawsuit.


Sorry you had a tough time. Hope things go better in the future.

What a horrible thing to happen. If that had been me I think I would have hurt that woman. Your daughter is lucky to have such a caring and understanding Mum.

Yikes, what a thoughtless person. I am so sorry!

Hope you grabbed the camera and deleted the pic.

Wow. that was very insensitive, regardless of a disability being present.
I would NEVER imagine taking a picture like that when ANY child was having a meltdown.

The more I deal with "NT" people, the more I think THEY are the ones with all the problems.
Gesh..

Thanks for the feedback. Sometimes it's hard for me to know if I am just overreacting. It is very painful for me to see my daughter in that state of emotional distress that I wondered if I was having a mini meltdown of my own. It helps to know others can relate to my reaction.

And "profoundly nt" ha ha I love that!

I can't believe she did that. I feel sorry for you that you had to go through all that. Did your daughter notice the picture taking?
Maybe, however, you could use this as an opportunity to teach you daughter about inappropriate behavior in adults, rudeness, 'opinions' based on false information, and all those things people do. She's going to encounter those, and I think it might be good to talk to her about it, develop some sort of procedure. At the same time, it could be a good opportunity to ask yourself what your answer or attitude will be the next time an adult does something totally unacceptable, so that you will save yourself the energy and anger which I'm sure you felt, but are all wasted on such ignorant, vile people.

That Mom is an idiot. Why would you take a picture of that. I've noticed that often camera phones, although helpful, have people taking pictures of the stupidest stuff.