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mikassyna
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17 Feb 2013, 8:57 pm

Today went for psychological evaluation for my 2nd child (DS1.5), who is now also offically diagnosed with "mild" PDD. Two kids out of two on the spectrum! Woo Hoo! Lucky me!! !



InThisTogether
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17 Feb 2013, 9:34 pm

I've said it before and I'll say it again, I think I actually prefer having 2 atypical kids. I think it would be very hard to have one typically developing kid and one not. I have friends who have a "mix" and they always feel that they are neglecting their NT kid to care for their non-NT one. I never have to worry about that because both kids have issues that need to be addressed. Also, as they are getting older, I think it is easier that both of them have deficits. It is bad enough to have them look at other kids and think "why can't I be like them?" I think it would be worse to look at your sibling and feel that way. At least they are in it together.

I don't know if that was what you were hoping to hear or not, but it it has been my experience.


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mikassyna
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17 Feb 2013, 9:52 pm

InThisTogether wrote:
I've said it before and I'll say it again, I think I actually prefer having 2 atypical kids. I think it would be very hard to have one typically developing kid and one not. I have friends who have a "mix" and they always feel that they are neglecting their NT kid to care for their non-NT one. I never have to worry about that because both kids have issues that need to be addressed. Also, as they are getting older, I think it is easier that both of them have deficits. It is bad enough to have them look at other kids and think "why can't I be like them?" I think it would be worse to look at your sibling and feel that way. At least they are in it together.

I don't know if that was what you were hoping to hear or not, but it it has been my experience.


That actually makes sense. I do have a full-time NT stepdaughter who is 12yo, and she is constantly feeling neglected because we are constantly putting fires out with my DS4.5. Now with DS1.5, he is basically good natured and oblivious so unfortunately he also gets a bit sidelined but thankfully for now doesn't seem to care as much. (However I'm sure that will change soon, haha!) Whenever I pay attention to DS1.5, in comes DS4.5 demanding attention, and then the meltdowns begin when I don't jump right away to his whim. We always have to have 2 adults around to make sure nobody destroys something or gets destroyed, because both of them are high maintenance. It is SO EXHAUSTING!! !



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18 Feb 2013, 6:42 pm

I have an AS DD5 and a so-far-NT DD1, they are very very different, although I see a few traits in the little one I can see its going to be hard work treating them so differently. I always tried to treat them equally but being so different they need different things. DD5 gets away with the little things because I have learnt to pick my battles with her and if shes playing with her food, I have to think at least shes sort of eating it! With DD1, although shes still young I see her copying her big sis but I find myself correcting behaviours in her I dont with DD5. On the other side I cant see I will have to tell DD1 off much, shes the golden girl and only needs telling once not to touch something. She seems able to understand whats hers to play with and whats not to touch, this amazes me as DD5 doesnt! I think its going to be a long hard battle and I just hope they dont grow up resenting eachother. DD5 gets all the attention, DD1 is practically self sufficient bless her! I try to even it out but its hard. Family are the same too, DD1 is ignored and even forgotten about, even when it comes to birthdays and Christmas.

However I am happy that DD1 will be able to help DD5 out when they are older, despite the age gap. Its also nice having one NT child as I feel a lot of people think DD5s behaviour is my fault, DD1 kind of disproves that!

I spose you get what you are given and we love em all the same :lol: