Do I have an obligation to tell about my AS/ADD symptoms?

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Rodland
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26 Aug 2014, 4:45 pm

Do you think I have an obligation to tell about my AS & ADD symptoms to a women whose child may be biologically mine? (we do not know about it). I discovered my condition around five years ago and it helped me a lot to understand why I have certain significant problems and why I am so different. It took many years to find that there were neurological issues behind my problems. Since then, I have been thinking about this question but partly since our relations have been difficult, I have not had guts to contact her. Also, it is not easy to decide how important the issue is. Telling about this may just cause unnecessary worries. One of my close relatives (grandfather) had strong symptoms (probably undiagnosed AS). This suggests that my condition is strongly heritable. We both have had problems with aggression.



ASDMommyASDKid
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26 Aug 2014, 5:02 pm

If neither of you has pursued a DNA test, and you therefore do not have a relationship (emotionally or financial ) with the mother or the child) and everyone is happy that way, then I am not sure what a disclosure would accomplish. I don't know at what probability either of you place your paternity at, but heritability is not 100%. Even if you were sure you were the father, ASD/ADD is not a certainty for the child.

It is a complex issue and you did not ask about anything else having to with the other aspect, so that is why I did not directly address other issues. I don't know how old the child is, whether someone else currently has father status in the child's life or any of the other issues surrounding the situation which might make things even more complicated than it sounds.

Edited for syntax.



Last edited by ASDMommyASDKid on 26 Aug 2014, 5:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.

cathylynn
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26 Aug 2014, 5:03 pm

it would be decent of you to share your medical history with your child's mother.



progaspie
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26 Aug 2014, 5:08 pm

You do not have an obligation to contact her about your AS condition since the child, as you say, may or may not be biologically yours. Also, if the child is biologically yours, the chances are that the child doesn't have AS. I would definitely wait until your former girlfriend contacts you.



YippySkippy
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26 Aug 2014, 8:03 pm

I think you're putting the cart in front of the horse, figuratively.
The child definitely has a father, but does not definitely have ASD. I don't understand why you're interested in the potential ASD but not the paternity.