How to choose a college for my Aspie Daughter
I have a sophmore daughter that isn't really thinking about college yet - she is fully mainstreamed so we are starting to think about college for her
However we don't know where to start. How do we choose a college that will support her special needs and still allow her to grow into an independent adult? Any thoughts, ideas for resources etc?
We want to narrow it down to a couple of choices by the time she is a junior so she can start applying and we can work on the financial aid - thanks for your help.
You are far more organized than we have been!
My son narrowed it down for himself pretty quickly by choosing some specific areas of study he wanted to have available. There weren't very many schools that offered all of them. He then toured these schools and a few others suggested by my husband last spring.
His instinct is that a small school will be much better for him, and he has also leaned heavily toward private, tech oriented schools. He found one top choice doing the areas of study search and touring the school affirmed it. My husband found another that he thinks would be great for my son and my son likes that school, as well.
My son did an interview with one this fall and is still working on his applications.
As far as I know, none of the schools my son is looking at offer special services for Aspies, but I think by their nature they probably attract a lot of them. One of my son's decisions will be whether he considers himself ready to go full in; he is unsure, and for that reason added a school much closer to home to his list. Then we could at least drive down and rescue him emotionally and organizationally on occasion. But, mostly, he's been focusing on developing little apps for himself that address his weaknesses, and has been testing them out this year at school.
He is good at self-advocacy, which helps.
I'm going to be in charge of the financial aid applications and, most definitely, am not looking forward to it. Despite my goals of getting better tracking of our spending in place before starting the process, I haven't. And such is life.
So I'm not sure I've helped at all!
The high school should be offering college nights and other ways to help get you into the process. It really is overwhelming, but I think you pick your place to start and attack it that way.
_________________
Mom to an amazing young adult AS son, plus an also amazing non-AS daughter. Most likely part of the "Broader Autism Phenotype" (some traits).
^^^^
She's really smart.
Based on my experience of semi-crash-and-burn at WVU, I would tend to recommend a small college close to home. That, though, is because that is what would have worked for me.
I think the main things for most ASD "kids" is that they are able to study what it is they want to study there, that it is not so big that they are going to be completely overwhelmed by the shuffle, and that it is not so high-pressure that they're going to, like, live in a state of permanent meltdown (if that makes any sense-- I know that is how the first three semesters of college felt to me).
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"Alas, our dried voices when we whisper together are quiet and meaningless, as wind in dry grass, or rats' feet over broken glass in our dry cellar." --TS Eliot, "The Hollow Men"
I'm not a parent, but I do have the experience of growing up with AS. I'd say there's no time like the present to teach her skills she needs for independence. I hear small schools recommended a lot, but that's not the right fit for everyone. I went to a college with 10-20,000 students and I don't regret that experience one bit. You know what your daughter is like more than anyone here, I just thought I'd bring up that point.
Thanks for the responses - She really wants to be a writer and I think could actually do well, but I want her to have at least a 2 year degree as a backup in case she has to get a 'real' job. I have been thinking about checking into online colleges that have writing programs.
Has anyone tried an online school? It seems like it might be a good fit for her because she could live at home, complete her courses and still work on her writing career for a year. Then if she wants to transfer to a University she would at least have some of her coursework done.
I think part of her reluctance to even think about college is fear of all of the changes it would involve. When she doesn't like something, she just ignores it and hopes it will go away.
I have a friend who completed her college degree on-line, but I haven't had a chance yet to see how that will play out for her in the employment market.
I do know it takes a lot of self-motivation. My son would never go on-line for school because he'd be too tempted to engage in other projects he finds more interesting. In addition, as a professional whose work is entirely on-line, I find it soul crushing to be staring at screens for hours and hours on end, although many Aspies don't seem to have the same problem. It really is a "know your daughter" type of decision.
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Mom to an amazing young adult AS son, plus an also amazing non-AS daughter. Most likely part of the "Broader Autism Phenotype" (some traits).
I am happy to report that my daughter has changed her mind and actually WANTS to go to college now - YEA!
That of course will make it so much easier and now we can comfortably look at the local colleges.
Thanks everyone for your support.
I agree. Many of those function under the guise of technical schools, but aren't real universities. Buyer be ware.
Thankfully, the poly techs my son is looking at are all highly reputable non-profit institutions.
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Mom to an amazing young adult AS son, plus an also amazing non-AS daughter. Most likely part of the "Broader Autism Phenotype" (some traits).
there are technical high schools like paid college but free for high school age children
Also some community colleges allow high school students to take classes part time. I don't know the cost, but check your local school.
there are online schools and there also real colleges that have correspondence class
I see you are from Mn. How far are you from Gustavus Adolphus College? I agree about trying to keep her nearby. I am an Apergirl and I started my undergraduate studies there. It combines a strong community with strong academics. More serious-minded, less a party school.
If you want to see how online works for her you can try Coursera (Coursera.org) without credit for free. Many are very high quality courses taught by world experts.
Has anyone tried an online school? It seems like it might be a good fit for her because she could live at home, complete her courses and still work on her writing career for a year. Then if she wants to transfer to a University she would at least have some of her coursework done.
I think part of her reluctance to even think about college is fear of all of the changes it would involve. When she doesn't like something, she just ignores it and hopes it will go away.
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www.4MyLearn.org
A COMMUNITY FOR ALL PEOPLE INTERESTED IN PEOPLE ACHIEVING THEIR POTENTIAL
We're starting to think about this issue as well. I went to a presentation specifically about transitioning issues and it was very interesting. They talked about this program: http://experiencecle.com/locations-2/
It's shockingly expensive -- $50,000 a year, which only includes the program, not school or housing -- and has limited locations, but if the regional center will pay for it we might want to go with it for the independent living skills training.
My current thinking is that our son will probably stay with us for at least the first few years of college and perhaps go to community college first. He's very smart, but young for his biological age -- I was the same, and I gave up on my first try at a 4 year college away from home and went to community college instead, which worked out really well.
If you have a local special needs parents group, it's worth checking to see if they offer anything about transitioning.
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Sharing the spectrum with my awesome daughter.
I agree with your son!! But I do not mind being called an Aspergirl. I have found many are really Awesome people.
_________________
www.4MyLearn.org
A COMMUNITY FOR ALL PEOPLE INTERESTED IN PEOPLE ACHIEVING THEIR POTENTIAL
BetwixtBetween
Veteran
Joined: 25 Feb 2014
Age: 41
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,543
Location: Mostly in my head
I chose one that was really small and in the middle of nowhere but had a good academic reputation, so I could get the attention I needed and become known to my professors. There was a book that I borrowed from the guidance office that helped me make my selection. I loved college. The school I chose, in so many ways, was exactly right for me.
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