Overly social....how do I teach her boundries????

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My Daughter Marrissa is Mid-Level ASD with SID, HOWEVER one thing that doesnt seem to be an issue for her is her socialness. However she can be Overly Social and most times Improperly interactive. She has No idea of Personal Space or boundries. In her mind Everyone Lives for her...the only reason they are here is to hold her and Fulfill her needs. When people come into our home...even strangers as well as out of the home the minute they go to leave she breaks down and starts crying in this sorrowful tone.
She likes to play with other kids as long as they dont touch her and let her play with what she wants...lol ...toddler much?
But she has no problem with Adults or much older kids touching her and in fact asks ANYBODY to pick her up. I went to the Fish store a while back and she ran up to a random guy and asked that he pick her up...This scares me! she'll go home with anyone.
She also has a thing for hair. She walkes up to everyone and runs her fingers through their hair or licks their arm and leg hair....Its soooo embarassing. I love the fact shes social and I want to encourage that but I would like to teach her boundries. Anyone have Any Ideas?? She'll be 3 on Aust 2nd...

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Hi Joyce
I just want to let you know I do not have any answers for you really as I am trying to figure this one out myself.

My son also invades strangers personal space by touching them on the front of their body. Buttons on their shirts or fiddles with their hands-he gets right in their faces..it is very hard.

If he gets an adult who will talk to him about his obsessions it is all over. Even more so when we are out in public. The cashier at the grocery store, postal clerks, neighbors, you name it. I cannot even talk to the adult I am there to see without him barraging them with questions about his obsessions or him asking them about what they are doing. He would even correct the librarian during story time if she would not use the real names of species when he was your dd's age. How was that for fun

I will be watching to see what replies you get here!
Best of luck!

My other child -dd- turns 3 in August too

Sounds sensory seeking, like my son. It's a good sign, though it may not seem like it now. She needs to be taught self-stimming, self-comforting. Hug her as much as you can and show her ways to blow off steam (jumping jacks, sitting upside down). Tell her stories about proper behavior with strangers and playmates. Are you acquainted with social stories?

Im sure its sensory behavior...especially with the hair thind...shes OBSESSED with different textures of hair!! !
I do hug her alot and we do alot of sensory therapy at home. she craves deep pressure so we do alot of rough housing, big hugs, pillow sandwiches...She loves when I push her away and comes back laughing because she likes the pressure force.
When in pubic and I see her going after someones hair I tell her no and try to distract her and of course she yells at me and continues when I turn around....ohhhh the joy...lol.
My husband has become soo frustrated with her because it seems she only wants him to hold her so she can run her fingers through her hair....He said "all I am to her is an object to maniipulate!" and hes right Untill she wants him to throw her up in the air.

What are social Stories???

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Intro to Carol Gray's Social Stories

Carol Gray is the brand name of social stories. 5 years ago, when just learning about autism, I briefly read her explanation and then proceeded to write my own cartoon social stories. I call them "schedules". They can be as specific and topical as showing how to eat a meal, to general rules of etiquette and social situations. I have converted my cartoons into daily plans/schedules so that my son can predict his day. New skills taught at home should be repeated at school too.

I don't have personal experience with Carol Gray's material, as I didn't want to buy something that I couldn't preview. I used familiar characters (Elmo) and eventually caricatures of family members to convey messages. These familiar icons made the stories more meaningful for my son. Now I can jot stuff down really fast.

Kim, can you post a sample?

I can't really post my stuff without scanning and uploading. It would take a long time, as I don't know my way around this iMac.

Carol Gray's site http://www.thegraycenter.org/socialstorywriting.cfm has this example of a Social Story [tm]

Z was always very tactile, and still is. One of his beggest problems in pre-school was he wanted to touch everybody's hair and some of the other children objected. He was three and a half. As with anything else dealing with social boundries it takes patience and repetition, much repetition. Add a liberal sprinkling of explanations about other people not liking to have their hair touched and eventually this will be understood.

I am assuming your daughter is pre-school age. The issue of approaching strangers is handled in a similar fashion. You may need to start by teaching her the difference between who is and who is not a stranger. Try to do this by not instilling unecessary fear. Maybe something like, "No, Honey, I'm sure he is a nice man but we don't know him so you shouldn't ask him to pick you. It's Okay to say hi but not to ask him to hold you." Again it will not happen overnite. Good luck!

sounds like our daughter......you mean, everyone doesn't live for her ?......of course, i knew this, because my daughter is the one everyone lives for !