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Drizzt
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13 Sep 2008, 10:05 am

My teenager was diagnosed recently as well as a neighbors teen of the same age.

They both started high school and while the transition is tough, my teen is doing much better at it then our neighbor's teen.

Neither kid knows of the other. Is it a good thing to try to team them up to help each other thru the high school??

I know they will end up in the same social skills groups, etc but I am concerned about the ability of one to help out the other in a meaningful way that makes HS better for the both of them, plus they are opposite sex which means different interests, friends, etc. At least, for now.

Can one uplift the other or is it possible that one could drag the other down?



ProtossX
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13 Sep 2008, 10:14 am

are you trying to hook ur son up with a potential girlfriend

dont understand this at all



physicsteen
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13 Sep 2008, 10:16 am

People with aspergers tend to do very well together. I'm a girl with aspergers, and I don't have that many feminine traits when it comes to personality. I'm a senior in high school who transferred to a new school, new town, and new household. I was asked if I would like to show a new person around who has aspergers. I agreed.

My robotics lab partner has aspergers. I chose him since he had a certain atmosphere around him. I was just drawn to him, and then I learned he had aspergers.

I think it would be a tremendous help to both of them if they could team up. Especially since they can easily relate to each other. I would try it.



Tortuga
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13 Sep 2008, 10:27 am

Yes. I would introduce them. My son's friends are all the spectrum. Some are higher functioning and a couple are nonverbal. They help each other and there is safety in numbers. If my son is out by himself, other kids pick on him. If he's out with his friend who has AS, people don't pay attention to them because they are two...instead of one.

If the other teen is lower functioning, your son will gain confidence and maybe some compassion. His social skills will not decline by being friends with her. But, I wouldn't force a friendship. Just introduce them and see how it goes.



Drizzt
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13 Sep 2008, 5:20 pm

ProtossX wrote:
are you trying to hook ur son up with a potential girlfriend

dont understand this at all


No hook up and I guess I was nervous about it sounding that way.

I think its been answered but I was just wondering if they would be compatible as friends to each other. I'm new to this entire diagnosis so I am reading and asking lots of questions since I have a lot to learn.



0_equals_true
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13 Sep 2008, 6:49 pm

yes you should introduce them. It it isn't a certainty but it is a good thing to do. Even if both of them are totallly socially clueless. Having one friend does really help.



schleppenheimer
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13 Sep 2008, 8:34 pm

We are in a school situation where we don't often know what kids at my son's school are on the spectrum, and which ones do not (the school doesn't like to share that information). But, having said this, out of the three kids my son eats lunch with, two of the three are probably on the spectrum. They just seem to "find" each other. Thank heavens.

Smart kids, or quiet kids, or kids with unusual interests tend to find each other. That's just the way of the world, if you're on the spectrum or not. So it's nice that this opportunity has presented itself for your child. Helping someone else out gives your child confidence, and there is definitely strength in numbers. In high school, I think that kids often have friends that are the opposite sex -- all of my kids have had friends like that. It's definitely an OK thing.



2ukenkerl
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13 Sep 2008, 11:58 pm

SURE, introduce them! I wish I had that benefit!



makuranososhi
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14 Sep 2008, 12:57 am

ProtossX wrote:
are you trying to hook ur son up with a potential girlfriend

dont understand this at all


...really. Where would you get that inference based on what was said? You've been on one track for quite some time, lately.

Drizzt, I think it can be very very helpful, providing it remains a positive experience for both of them. Having someone who can relate to something instead of being quizzical - even if it isn't completely understood - can mean a lot. It also gives someone to almost practice relating to who may not be as overwhelming as starting with someone completely outside the spectrum. Long story short, I don't think it can hurt, and is worth a shot.


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16 Sep 2008, 3:45 pm

Drizzt wrote:
ProtossX wrote:
are you trying to hook ur son up with a potential girlfriend

dont understand this at all


No hook up and I guess I was nervous about it sounding that way.

I think its been answered but I was just wondering if they would be compatible as friends to each other. I'm new to this entire diagnosis so I am reading and asking lots of questions since I have a lot to learn.
Ignore this protossX guy.

I think that's a wonderful idea, although I guess it would depend on your teenager and the other kid. I wouldn't recommend forcing them if they're don't want to.


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Babtor24
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16 Sep 2008, 9:11 pm

I think it would be a great idea and would be a launching pad for both of them to find other friends and be exposed to differing experiences which is a good thing.