Is my kid’s IEP necessary?

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I don’t expect anyone here to really answer. I’m just trying to figure out how to ask the teachers without creating a problem.

My daughter just started ninth grade at our local high school. She was in a charter school through eighth grade, so we hardly know anyone in our own town.

When she was younger, she had some academic issues, was a little late in learning to read, and I thought the IEP made sense. Over time, I’ve had the feeling that it is less and less necessary. Today, I’m wondering whether she needs any special treatment at all. Then again, she and I are different, and maybe I’m missing something. I’m an Aspie, she is not.

I asked her today. She says that the extra support person in English is helpful because it is a big class, but the math class is small and the extra help isn’t necessary. Still, she doesn’t want to give it up in case things are different in a future class.

Then there’s the political background. She attended the first half of kindergarten in the local school, which was awful, for a thousand reasons. (Special ed was not yet an issue for us.)
I made a big stink… long story… I got a few people in trouble, and then left in a huff.
Now, the b``ch is back.

Since we left, the place is completely under new management and seems to have changed. I’m entering with the expectation that it’s a good school and that everything will be fine.

In fact, they seem a little too nice. It could be my imagination. It’s a low-income town, and it doesn’t seem likely that they could be so nice to everybody.

Another possible factor is that one of my mother-in-law’s best friends is now the head of the special ed department. She is not the type to give special treatment for personal friends, and I’m not the type to expect it. Still, sometimes people assume that they need to kiss butt if you have special connections.

I don’t want to waste the school’s limited resources on services that are not beneficial. But I don’t know how to ask.

Is this special attention really helpful, or are they kissing my butt because they’re afraid of me, or are they kissing my butt because they’re afraid of my connection to the boss?

Last edited by Tahitiii on 29 Sep 2008, 10:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I say who cares, let the ends justify the means.

Is your daughter being helped? Although it rarely seems to be that way, the school's raison d'etre is to educate the children. All children.

You, as parent, are the liaison between your daughter and her educators. So liaise. It sounds like you have an opportinuty to do some good. Call a family meeting and ask her what would actually help. Then communicate.

People appear to be on your side. The other shoe may not drop next week.

The statement which stood out most to me in your post was...she does not want to give it up. I say go with what she wants. Two years ago, my son made the decision he no longer wanted an IEP or to to be treated as different in school. The school was not pleased at all, but I was more inclined to follow his wishes. He seems to be doing fine without it, and it is still has option to start up again if he changes his mind.

So, you both seem to be saying, "don't rock the boat..."
It seems like a waste, when other kids might be getting short-changed.
But I suppose you're right.

By the way, I love your siggy.
Do you even remember the Bugs Bunny Theme, or is this a reference to something else?
I can still hear it in my head, and it's taken on more meanings for me over the years.

Not really. The aids working with the kids know who needs the most help. I was always bothered my son was not getting the aid his IEP lined up for him. I found out he was doing homework from his regular class during speech in elementary school. If they did anything with him it was to give him worksheets. The speech teacher was supposed to be working with him on conversational speech. However, she used the excuse that there were kids with severe speech impediments in the class who needed much more help than my son. I took it as...maybe she was right or maybe she did not know how to improve his conversational speech, and told her to send him back to class and he could do his class work there.

And, Oh what heights we'll hit...
Yeah, that's it.

I agree as someone with an iep I found it benefical especially when I went to college where I was allowed to use those accomodations if I wished. Did I use it alot? no not really but it was there if I needed it. I believe in general that the best person to answer that has already given you an answer.

I highly doubt any of them are even aware of, or have any memory of, the incident in K, so they aren't afraid of you.

I don't know a lot of people who kiss butt because of connections. But I do know a lot of people that find it easier to be nice to someone that knows someone they know and so on ... in the NT world, it's a bit like being cousins. You already have something in common so, yippee, we're friends even though we've never spoken a word (OK, I'm exaggerating, but you get the point). It isn't kissing butt, it's friendship by association. Most people who work in schools are also part of the community, so most of them know quite a few of the parents outside of school as well. It took me a while to get used to that as a parent, seeing those "authority" figures around town, and then I realized wait, they're just people living life like we are, and connections are going to happen without anyone working really hard to make them.

Which leaves whether or not your daughter needs the accommodations. If the aides and other professionals who work with your daughter feel she no longer needs them, they would most likely "graduate" her, in my experience. My son was been graduated out of a few services as the IEP goals have been met. Some he's gone into again as he has gotten older and expectations have increased, but it is my experience that the team is constantly looking at what is needed and what isn't. Some teams are better at making an accurate assessment than others, but the process is fairly constant. When is your daughter's annual IEP? This would be the time they would normally review needs and determine what needs to stay in place, and what doesn't.

In other words, I wouldn't worry that your daughter may be receiving services that she may no longer need, and that this is going to continue into perpetuity unchecked. There is a process for updating it, and I would simply let the process run its course.

you could always ask for a review of the iep before her next PPT. my guess is that if the school system feels she's receiving services that she doesn't need, that they'll push to end the services....

DW mom wrote it beautifully!!

School districts will not continue services because they are fearful of parents. In the school district I work, we have dealt a lot with parents who are .. well... not the most pleasant of people.

Teachers are not going to keep a child on an IEP if they don't need it, usually. If she no longer qualifies for an IEP, she can still get accommodations via the 504 route.

I am certain her services are not preventing another child from getting them. School districts are required to serve every student in need and if they don't have enough available resources, they need to get those needed resources.

You are so thoughtful, though. You really seem like you are a caring individual.