why are feminist obsessed with Nice guys(TM)

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starvingartist
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11 Mar 2014, 6:04 pm

ModusPonens wrote:

starvingartist wrote:

there is a question i would like to ask before i leave this conversation, i am an insatiably curious person:

i believe i mentioned earlier how not standardly "feminine" i am, and that it extends not just to my personality but my neurology and my perception--for example, i have always been analytical as well as visually-spatially acute (i'm an excellent driver, and i offer as evidence the fact that i can back a large diesel pickup with a full trailor-style motor home on the back of it into a very long straight driveway from the street). my consciousness is very much visually-oriented--i am in fact a visual artist, and my style of drawing is hyper-realism. i am curious to know how you would explain, MP, exactly how i am "denying my womanly nature" by having the sort of neurology i was born with? does denial not imply choice? how did i manage to choose to be born with what people typically classify as a "male" neurology so as to "deny" the automatic femininity that apparently comes with my genitals?

please explain.

Well, if you are able to analyse it a bit further, you'll conclude that I'm talking about the overwhelming majority of women, not all women. Women don't divide sharply into lesbians and heterosexuals. It's more nuanced than that, of course. And if there are exceptions to the overwhelming majority of human females' sexual behaviour, it's probably found on lesbians and/or aspies (or people with a very different way of socializing). Even then, I still mantain that most heterosexual aspie women do have this sexual behaviour, even though they, sometimes, are a bit less feminine.

As for lesbians, that's a whole different gigantic discussion. And that would be, in fact, speculation. But if it took you 8 pages to recognise that what I'm saying is not an as**olic, lunatic and baseless rant; that I may have a point somewhere _ even though you deny it _ then I couldn't ever discuss that with you.

But I leave you with a TEDx talk that will make you put under fire your assumption that you're not that different from men and, in particular, why genitals have more to do with your mind than you imagine. One funny example is him provocatively saying that, because the difference of male and female genetics is the same difference, in percentage, as the difference of male humans and male chimpanzes, Bill Clinton is as close to Hillary Clinton as he is to a chimpaze. It's a fun talk. Not misogynist, don't worry.

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nQcgD5DpVlQ[/youtube]

i'm not a lesbian, nor does my sexuality match what you described earlier. i am attracted to men--i am neither dominant nor submissive. i appreciate equal and complementary companionship, partnership, not power-trips. sexuality and gender are spectral in nature, not binary. open your mind.

edit: i am a complete person looking for another complete person to share my life with--not a half looking for my other half. if i don't find that other person, i will be alright on my own, thanks to that completeness.

LKL
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11 Mar 2014, 10:17 pm

This thread, summed up:
Men:
"Why won't more women do x that I like, why is female behavior like y?"
Women:
"Because your assumptions about women are wrong, and we would rather do y than x because we're people just like you."
Men:
"That can't be right, of course women like x, that's what women are for. You women just don't understand female nature properly."

khaoz
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11 Mar 2014, 10:41 pm

zer0netgain wrote:

AspergianMutantt wrote:

Women want that confident male thats also ambitious. and males whom are well off at first seems that way to women, and thats why many men seems to think women only want them for their money.

Frankly, the problem is that men and women don't think the same way.

Men only know what women SAY they want. Women, however, don't say what they REALLY want.

Men generally have no patience for such head games.

Guys who try to be what women say they want get little to nothing for it.

I also think women have very unrealistic expectations of what they want in a man...and are never satisfied because they can't find their non-existent ideal man.

Thank you for mentioning the "head games" women play. The "chase", the using one man to make another man jealous, the using men because they, especially the using 'nice guys" as "friends" when they know the nice guy loves them more than the "bad" guy ever will.

I think this one struck a nerve with me.

beneficii
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11 Mar 2014, 10:59 pm

ModusPonens wrote:

Do you still think I have no theory of mind?

Actually, I've read that people with ASD and average or above average intelligence actually make very heavy use of theory of mind, along with people with schizophrenia. The reason why is that we lack the full capacity for embodied interaction that neurotypical people have; embodied interaction allows the minds of others to be less opaque, making it unnecessary for neurotypical people to have to make heavy use of theory of mind.

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AspieOtaku
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12 Mar 2014, 1:27 am

LKL wrote:

That sounds like the conversation between you and ArrantPariah! :lol:

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yo_Pk-JFaXk[/youtube]

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The_Walrus
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12 Mar 2014, 6:36 am

ModusPonens wrote:

But I leave you with a TEDx talk that will make you put under fire your assumption that you're not that different from men and, in particular, why genitals have more to do with your mind than you imagine. One funny example is him provocatively saying that, because the difference of male and female genetics is the same difference, in percentage, as the difference of male humans and male chimpanzes, Bill Clinton is as close to Hillary Clinton as he is to a chimpaze. It's a fun talk. Not misogynist, don't worry.

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nQcgD5DpVlQ[/youtube]

You know inherited more genetic material from your mother than your father? And you'll pass more on to your daughters than your sons?

ArrantPariah
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12 Mar 2014, 6:44 am

AspieOtaku wrote:

LKL wrote:

That sounds like the conversation between you and ArrantPariah! :lol:

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yo_Pk-JFaXk[/youtube]

ArrantPariah
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12 Mar 2014, 8:49 am

Pssssttt.....If you want a wench who will do "x" (and who doesn't?), then you have two options:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oXUelJZSPxY[/youtube]

or

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sR7EyZaxkFM[/youtube]

XFilesGeek
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12 Mar 2014, 9:14 am

LKL wrote:

Additionally, it's apparently impossible for women to understand "male nature," but it's possible for men to know what every woman wants and how every woman behaves.

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ArrantPariah
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12 Mar 2014, 9:39 am

XFilesGeek wrote:

LKL wrote:

Additionally, it's apparently impossible for women to understand "male nature," but it's possible for men to know what every woman wants and how every woman behaves.

Oh, cum on. We're not that hard to figure out.

AspergianMutantt
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12 Mar 2014, 9:47 am

XFilesGeek wrote:

LKL wrote:

Additionally, it's apparently impossible for women to understand "male nature," but it's possible for men to know what every woman wants and how every woman behaves.

Oh come on, men have been trying to figure women out since the dawn of time, while woman seems to think they don't need to like men are an open book to them and are simple minded and easy to read. therefore we done the more study and research and have put more thought behind it all. (snickers)

khaoz
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12 Mar 2014, 10:51 am

ArrantPariah wrote:

AS man, I didn't see anything familiar or appealing in either of those videos.

ArrantPariah
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12 Mar 2014, 11:28 am

khaoz wrote:

AS man, I didn't see anything familiar or appealing in either of those videos.

Do you have a third option?

khaoz
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12 Mar 2014, 11:32 am

ArrantPariah wrote:

khaoz wrote:

AS man, I didn't see anything familiar or appealing in either of those videos.

Do you have a third option?

I don't even understand what the "options" are in these two videos. I only know they were both like Spockumentaries to me.

XFilesGeek
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12 Mar 2014, 11:34 am

ArrantPariah wrote:

XFilesGeek wrote:

LKL wrote:

Additionally, it's apparently impossible for women to understand "male nature," but it's possible for men to know what every woman wants and how every woman behaves.

Oh, cum on. We're not that hard to figure out.

I'll never fully grasp the complexity of your mind, AP.

ArrantPariah
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12 Mar 2014, 11:37 am

XFilesGeek wrote:

ArrantPariah wrote:

Oh, cum on. We're not that hard to figure out.

I'll never fully grasp the complexity of your mind, AP.

I did place a hint in there. :wink:

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