Virginity

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OMG how religion can f**k with peoples minds. Sexual intercourse is damn fine fun, your getting married, you love her, she loves you, more importantly she wants sexual intercourse which means you are not imposing upon her. If you have demons about this go get some professional help. There is nothing dirty or sinful about what your fiancée is proposing, is one of the best ways to complete a fulfilling relationship. Ooh and did I mention that it is damn fine fine

Whatever you do ... it's your choice.

BUT

Discuss and Agree fully with your partner before you walk down the aisle. Otherwise it's going to be a real short marriage.

Except for the hymen

I agree, it turns out to be just a social and cultural concept (originally religious and for women), in which in the physical sense, it's meaningless.

However that mere concept, gives people troubles with self steem wether they want or not to lose it, I suppose that some who have been abused and when the word virginity or virgin comes to mind, there would be a reminding there, unpleasent for them, I suppose that happens.

Also, I don't believe in that cliche that the first time has to be "special", not only that it doesn't have to be, but it can give emotional problems for those who believe it.

I didn't so much care about losing my virginity, I just wanted to get laid!

As far as making the first time "special," I just wanted it (for me) to be without interruptions, a struggle, or embarrassment. I was concerned for her comfort, of course, but if she hadn't been willing I'd have found someone else.

the first time is only special in that it's normally semi awkward. good first times are possible but it's not something that should necessarily be expected...if anything, the awkward should be expected and prepared for and the good should just be a surprising little bonus if it works out.

Uhhh. I think that there is no way that teddy bear can be interpreted to represent the kids' virginity! LOL. Where did you get that from?

For several reasons that teddy bear would NOT represent the childrens' virginity. Plus, a teddy bear is very routinely used to symbolize the childhood. In this case, the childhood of these two children was torn (violated) and damaged.

It would be absurd for the teddy bear to symbolize the kids' virginity. That would mean they were sex objects in a movie with a primarily sexual message. Ugh.

What are these "several reasons"?



I have heard a theory that a person is not fully grown until they have sex. So, in this case, even if it represents a childhood, still the conclusion is the same: sex damages childhood, even if performed by adults.

Now I know that childhood might already be "dead" because it's life-span is only around 18 years. But there are still straws to grasp on that it might be alive. First of all, like I mentioned, a person is not fully grown until they have sex. Secondly, aspies are a lot younger than their age. Even though I am 29, I think and as a 12 year old in many respects. So for these two reasons it is possible that my childhood is still alive and I will poison it through sex.



If virginity was a sex object, then the symbols of virginity, like a circle of light around people's heads, drawn on icons is also a sex object. That, of course, would be absurd: they don't draw sex objects on icons.

So, if anything, virginity is opposite to sex object.

Paul said that at a time when Christians expected that Jesus would return within their lifetimes.



I think your girlfriend is right. Virginity is a state of being sexually inexperienced. The important part is inexperience. That's why virginity is used metaphorically for other states of inexperience. Someone who loves flying may declare you have lost your virginity after your first solo flight. Losing virginity = losing inexperience = gaining experience. I never heard or read of any religion or philosophy that sees virginity as a separate sentient being that would be tortured by sex.

Many cultures value women not having sexual experience before marriage because this is seen as an indication that she is not too interested in sex, and is less likely to have an affair. That increases the husband's confidence that he is the father of her children. The same cultures generally value male virginity a lot less.

I know only one context in which male virginity is valued, and that is when preparing to serve God by serving all God's children equally. Then being especially concerned about one person distracts from that ideal. That is the reason why monks and nuns (in all religions that have them) and Roman Catholic priests are supposed to be celibate. That was also the reason for Paul's comment on marriage, at a time when the second coming of Jesus was expected to be imminent, and Christians were not supposed to be distracted from preparing for that by thinking about any one special person. But if you plan to marry anyway, your wife is supposed to be someone special. That's why marriage is a sacrament, and you make public promises in church that your spouse will be someone special. If you intend to marry, you have already chosen a path that removes the main reason for continued sexual abstinence. I don't think Roman Catholic doctrine agrees that virginity is a separate spirit that suffers when someone has sex. If you have other reasons, discuss them with your girlfriend before you get married. Many people find sex or having children important enough that it could change their mind about who they marry.

To get an authoritative answer, you need to consult a priest or a theologian of your faith. I think my answer is correct, but I am no longer a practicing Christian, and my religious education was long ago.

Roman, you are referring to the Book of Revelation for the 144000 virgins. Well, the one of many revelations that the Romans let in the Bible in the mid-4'th century but that's another story. And Revelations is chucked full of clearly symbolic and allegorical imagery. There is no basis at all to conclude that its literal virginity any more then a harlot on the back of a multi-headed beast is literal.

I recommend that if you have the stomach for really twisted logic to get around the inconsistencies, that you start a really analytical study of the Judaeo-Christin scripture. But if you would rather have your 'faith' then the truth, so be it.

I think that Paul was trying to differentiate within the context of the period he was in between two groups arguing which was more spiritual getting married or abstaining from marriage and sex. He states that neither is more holy than the other, and that man was created to be with a woman but if the person prefers to remain a virgin that they should not be forced to marry. Basically it meant no one should be forced to be married or be forced to remain unmarried but that they should do whichever is best for them, and that there is no right answer for everyone.

Virginity is not an entity, just not having had sex before. Many people who are raped still consider themselves virgins because they did not willingly have sex. Though in that case it is a matter of "virgin by mind" and not "by body".

paul was f****d in the head and believed sex distracted a man from god. it's purely his own beliefs and not especially expressed anywhere else in the bible.

also, paul is the only one who talks about hating gays other than leviticus (and no one follows the laws of lev anyways).

anyone else think mondern christianity is more like paulianity? most all the sexual repression and intolerance comes from him.

I think you should seriously consider letting your girlfriend go to marry someone else if you don't intend to have sex and she wants to. If these are truly your beliefs, perhaps you should consider becoming a monk or a priest or remaining celibate and solitary.

I don't agree with the beliefs you have, but that's neither here nor there, because you will still believe them.

the teddy bear symbolized a loss of innocence. virginity is not the same as innocence. if you're an adult, you've already lost your innocence, albeit not prematurely like in the film.

There was an American sect in the 19th century called the Shakers. They didn't believe in sex, either. They made some fantastic furniture (all that energy has to go somewhere... but they died out a century or more ago...

If not having sex is so virtuous, then why is 'non-cosumation' considered a grounds for annulment of marriage in the Catholic church?

You should seriously consider talking to your girlfriend about getting married if you want to be celibate. Some people believe that married sex is a gift, along with children. And Paul said it was better to marry than Burn (although he changed Christianity as much as Jesus did)