It's stupid when feminists say that porn is misogynistic

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I personally have a hard time being objective about this stuff because I'm an abuse survivor and I don't like being dominated in the bedroom because it triggers me (even thinking about it does.) I know a lot of abuse survivors get into BDSM as some kind of empowering 'take back you pain' way of overcoming it, but I can't think of anything worse for me to do. I've always felt like I'm doing it wrong in the bedroom because my 'natural female submissiveness' has literally been beaten out of me.

I still think the correlation between puking on cock and mental health problems is high though. Even if this was an easier topic for me to think about, I think I would still come to this conclusion just because it is what it is.

It's good that you understand the reason for your being non-objective. It's an understandable reason, and you should receive sympathy for it. But what you don't receive is a permit saying "my non-objective viewpoints carry more weight". With respect, there is a reason why someone with a personal grievance against the defendant doesn't get to sit on the jury.



That sucks. But in my opinion, there isn't really such a thing as "natural female submissiveness". It's possible that you were never the sort of person who would have enjoyed being sexually submissive. Maybe you didn't "lose" anything. And even if you did "lose" something, I guess it just means that you were transformed into a person who doesn't like being sexually submissive. Well, those type of people aren't exactly rare. Either way, you probably ended up well within the normal range of sexual behaviour.

I never said 'my non-objective viewpoints carry more weight', nor would I ever claim such a thing.

The reason I'm focusing on a specific act like vomiting is because I think the fact that I'm traumatised doesn't affect my opinion on that very much. My opinion is more based on the physical and mental aspects of vomiting excluding all pleasure.

Feeling like you've lost something is a normal reaction to being abused, whether you actually have or not. So is feeling intrinsically 'wrong'. I find it hard to feel normal when if I look for porn on the internet, I always have to scroll past not just stuff I find distasteful, but stuff that's actually triggering of bad memories. It seems like normal is female submissiveness - but then I guess there are worse things in the world than not being normal. I just have to try and heal myself up and not torture myself mentally over it, then I'll be able to scroll past that stuff without getting upset.

I'm not sharing this to get sympathy, I just want to give a bit of background as to why I'm coming at this from the angle I am - and also why I'm focusing on one thing that I don't believe cannot be abusive.

Well when people think of "normal" BDSM type stuff, what do they think of? Spanking? Restraints? Well, there's nothing pleasant about any of that. It's either pain or restricted movement. So it seems like your way of thinking would cast doubt on all BDSM type stuff. At the end of the day, erotic stuff is 99% psychological. It's not just "stimulate genitals, receive pleasure".



That's easily the strongest thing you've said so far. It's gone beyond "controversial" into the realms of "laughable". Are you actually claiming that no woman has ever agreed to cock-puking type stuff without some ulterior motive of mental illness or past abuse or monetary gain? You're saying that no couple has ever tried it just to see what it might be like, whether or not they ended up liking it?

I can't continue this conversation.

I remember a thread discussing whether pornography was inherently degrading, where another member, coincidentally also a moderator, asserted that the idea of someone enjoying a "facial" was ridiculous, otherwise they'd just squirt goo onto their own face... Putting aside the admittedly hilarious mental image for the moment, I hear comments like that and wonder if the people making them really have that poor of an understanding of human sexuality, or if it's just the "Aspie factor" asserting itself in yet another area.

I find it easy to survey the odder things that happen to turn me on for reasons that aren't explicable to me, and extrapolate that other people likely have similar unexplained erotic responses and that don't necessarily make sense or were chosen, and that I shouldn't make assumptions or judgments based upon them, but apparently that sort of awareness isn't common.

I know I said I'd drop this, but my reason for believing that vomiting from fellatio is abusive is because it's overwhelming physically and mentally. People who like being controlled enjoy the thought of being controlled, but when you are throwing up, it's impossible to think about anything but the puking itself. I am completely aware that the mental aspect of sex is important.

Also pain is quite close to pleasure in cases like spanking and nipple torture partly because it's on erogenous zones, but the pain of puking just doesn't seem like the type that could be enjoyed in that way. This is from someone who actually likes pain (because liking pain isn't always linked to being submissive.)

I've said this before.

I'll go back to hiding now.

You're much less out of touch than the poster I was talking about, I really couldn't tell sometimes if something was intended seriously or as parody.

You know, when I've come across this kind of material it's not usually actual vomiting that's going on, more like coughing and choking with some exaggerated drooling and saliva; if the girl actually pukes, that's usually considered a bad take. I'm aware that there is vomit specific stuff out there, but I don't think it's as common as you're making it out to be. I could imagine the eroticism coming from approaching the boundary area where going to far could cause vomiting and trying to stay just on the edge of it, sort of like breath control or other forms of edge play. As to the actual vomit stuff, control is one of the most widely present sexual fetishes, and what greater loss of control is there than an involuntary reaction? Does it seem weird to me? Certainly, as do a lot of sexual practices, but I don't think you'd have to be mentally ill to enjoy it.

I understand involuntary reactions being erotic experiences - that's part of the fun of 'making' someone have an orgasm. It's just puking: the brain interprets it as you being ill. I don't think humans find illness sexy (unless it's patently role-played illness, like with a medical fetish.) That's why puking is called being sick in British lingo.

And yes, I've seen the exaggerated saliva/phlegm/regurgitated jizz stuff which actually isn't vomit. I've never seen actual vomit in amateur porn, so I was talking about something that was hypothetical to me.

Also, I used to be a domme; that was my attempt at 'reclaiming' my sexuality - although it didn't work because even though I understand the domme thing and enjoy it to an extent, I prefer loving sex, but that's just me. So I can see the point in making someone squirm and wince if they enjoy it, but I don't see how making someone physically sick can be enjoyed. That's a separate issue, though. From a domme's point of view, it's more I lack the theory of mind to understand it. From the sub's POV it's more the actual experience of being sick and all it entails.

^

The one that kills me is that I've seen professional dommes list the sjambok as one of the tools they'll use on a client. I don't know if you're familiar with this device, but it originally was a rhino hide whip of sorts, used to herd cattle in Africa. The modern version is usually made of PVC plastic, and was actually employed as a riot weapon/torture device by the South African Police, and is still used by vigilantes in that country to exact a sort of mob justice on criminals. Here's a pic:



I own one of these things due to my fascinations with weapons, and it's among the post painful implements I've ever encountered, with even a light stroke being abolutely agonizing, like being hit with a switch on steroids. The idea of being voluntarily whipped with one of these things, let alone enjoying it, is incredibly alien to me, but I'm not going to judge those people for it, to each their own.

At the extreme end of extreme, I know of a case in Germany where a man successfully placed a personal add looking for someone to be voluntarily killed and eaten; the two of them castrated the volunteer and together cooked and ate his testicles before the voluntary murder and cannibalism occurred. I like to think of this story when people in L&D complain about not being able to meet anyone through personal adds; I figure if this guy could, anyone at least has a chance.

What you're arguing is that all fundamentalists are either brainwashed (have you looked up the definition of the word yet?) or insane or dishonest because they're wrong. That does not follow. Insanity may cause someone to be wrong about something, but being wrong about something does not cause them to become insane. Being wrong about something doesn't cause dishonesty, either. Nor is being brainwashed the only way to come to an incorrect conclusion.

Also, saying "you are an idiot because you insist you're right when you're wrong" makes no sense. Insisting that you're right when you're wrong is stubbornness, not stupidity. It is not only not impossible, it isn't particularly rare for an intelligent person to be stubborn about something. Being stubborn doesn't make you stupid or insane or dishonest.

No person in his right mind would believe the stuff fundamentalists believe. It takes way too much faith in things one wouldn't believe without being conditioned to believe them. Parental indoctrination or indoctrination from the church or allowing the Bible to dictate to you the historical and moral truths because you live in a society that strongly encourages this are all ways to get you brainwashed to believe all the nonsense in the Bible.

No, because homosexuality itself isn't risky and not even a behavior. And there's no valid reason why one should consider it a mental illness rather than just a sexual orientation that is expressed for same gender rather than opposite. The pros did use to consider it an illness in the past, but after the studies and agreements made, that's just history now.

So, this thread went from the undocumented claim that "Porn Stars are Batshit Insane" to the undocumented claim that "Religious People are Batshit Insane" in just a few days.

I see I hit a nerve.