Why is everone making a fuss about gay marriage?

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Yay, I just found out that we legalised gay marriage in New Zealand a few days ago! Life seems to be continuing as per normal.

Good for New Zealand!

-Bill, otherwise known as Kraichgauer

Because people are ignorant jerks who would rather make other people's lives suck than face their own sucky lives.

Where's the part in the Bible that says only heterosexual couples are allowed to tax benefits (by a secular government)?

I’m missing the brilliant argument that, technically, homosexual people have never been discriminated against as to marriage: they have always been allowed to marry under the same rules as everyone else; namely, that they marry someone of the opposite sex

I have a tiny bit of sympathy for this argument - it's not as silly as it might first appear.

A comparison: the behaviour that comes naturally to a normal person (not murdering people) is legal, but the behaviour that comes naturally to a murderous psychopath (murdering people) is illegal. Does that mean that by making murder illegal, we are discriminating against murderous psychopaths with respect to "natural behaviour"? Of course not. The two acts (murdering / not murdering) are very different, and one is harmful while the other isn't.

But the key difference is that in the case of straight marriage and gay marriage, neither act is harmful, and the two acts are not actually very different.

I think gay marriage should be legal. To me, it's ridiculous to ban it. If your religion teaches that it's wrong, then don't marry someone of the same sex. Let other people do what makes them happy!

I honestly think that government should stay out of "marriage" and make everyone, gay or straight, have a civil union. No ceremony, just go to the courthouse and fill out the papers and file them. Then let people have ceremonies however they want. Through their church, something they do themselves, whatever.

People should be able to have legally recognized civil unions or private marriages or even both, but only govt sanctioned civil unions, which would be available to both straight and gay people, would be recognized by insurance, taxes, or anything like that etc. The same law should apply to both gay and straight couples.

I also think that polygamy should be legal.

Civil unions lack the romantic flair that marriage has... I don't think that many would agree with that...

I do believe in equality... not just in marriage, but in all things... gender roles in our society are stupid... we have gotten to the point where we have male, female, genderqueer, transgendered, male lesbian, female lesbian... and soooo many more... and who cares who someone else wants to have sex with? It doesn't effect their ethics, morals, work ethic, output or anything of the sort...

So... equality for all!

I'm not suggesting that we cut out marriage entirely, I love a good wedding! I just think the government should stay out of it. We already have to go get a marriage license and then after that either have a wedding or just go to the courthouse for the ceremony. My suggestion is to call the whole thing a civil union or even make something else up, but it would work like this. You want to get married so you both go to the courthouse and get a license (whatever you want to call it) and when you both sign it in front of the notary you are hitched. No ceremony is required. The ceremony can be called marriage, a wedding, whatever you want to call it and it can be done by anyone. Churches of course would still do them and you could still have a non church wedding the way you do now, but it wouldn't be required. It would just be added for the "oomph" or for those who are religious to have religious sanction for their marriage.

Any church would of course be free to pick and choose who they allow to marry.

Also, you could have a church wedding without getting the license and while your marriage is recognized by your religion it's not by the government.

I honestly think this would be the perfect solution.

If by, "stay out of it," you mean not recognizing any legal status arising from a wedding ceremony, I am entirely with you. This has been the French solution for centuries.

OliveOilMom's suggestion makes perfect sense. Everybody gets what they want, and gets to call it whatever they want without getting butthurt over being discriminated against/devaluing the institution of marriage, insert your angle here.

Well, given the demonstrations that took place in France this week, clearly the separation of legal marriage and religious marriage does not eliminate people feeling "butthurt" over inclusion and exclusion.

Their problem. If both sides had a little more respect for the sincerely held beliefs behind their positions they might be more easily able to find common ground. Two (plus) people love each other and want to formally cement their bond. They do it in law with equal status, any further religious or cultural additions optional; job done. Why this is an issue for jurisdictions around the world is beyond me - people's domestic arrangements should be no business of the state. You appear to be commenting on the assumption I am favouring one side of the debate - i'm not. i think both sides are getting equally aerated on behalf of their own perspectives, regardless of their perceived merit. Approaching it from OOM's perspective, the angst becomes unneccessary. I'm no bigot. please take my comment at face value.

I'm not making any assumptions about you. I'm commenting about the people in France who were making their feelings perfectly clear.

From my perspective, the government absolutely must be involved. So long as the law provides benefits to indivduals based on their decision to form a family together, the government must approach that question in an even handed way. When it comes to taxes, survivorship and inheritance, guardianship of children, authority to consent, immunity from summons, and the hundreds of other privileges spouses have with respect to each other, this is very much the business of the state.

And as has been made clear by the episodes in France, OliveOilMom's does not make the angst unnecessary.