Victims of pedophile priests and imams help create more vict

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Pffft.

You can listen to those who profit from such abuse and who are quite happy to see it continue all you want.

I would rather think the right and moral way.

I look forward to your reply on the application of the Golden Rule.

Regards
DL

You think that psychologists and advocates want child sexual abuse to continue??

If by the Golden Rule you're speaking of "do unto others as you would have them do unto you"--this philosophy is neither universal nor universally appropriate or applicable. What if I am a sadist and enjoy pain: should I go around hurting other people because I should expect that everyone else likes pain like I do and wants to be hurt because that's what I like?

Your black-and-white, all-or-nothing, limited perspective and your inability to apply critical thinking or compassion to this issue makes me think further discussion with you is pointless. I won't be wasting my time replying further. I will, however, leave you with a reiteration of my earlier suggestion: please speak with someone with relevant experience in person about your views on victims of child sexual abuse so your perspective and ability to think critically on the subject can be expanded beyond it's current limitations.

You keep going on about the Golden Rule and you're forgetting the second part of that phrase ...as you would have others do unto you

Therefore, if someone would not fault a previous victim for their abuse, then they would be doing just by not reporting anything. Because that is what they would have done unto them- having the previous victim look out for themselves and not make their suffering worse by enduring prolonged exposure to it.

The Golden Rule is very relative when read literally. If I hate myself and harm myself, I am complying with the Golden Rule by harming others. Failing to do so would actually violate the principle.

All it means is people consistently apply their own morals. It's not a moral in and of itself.

posting it anyway even though most of the point was duplicated...

Thanks for dodging the question and if your sadist reference is the best you can do to express the Golden Rule, then you should wonder about your thinking and not mine.

If the victim and his family had doing unto other in mind, they would know that they would have liked to be warned of the predator and they would also know that laying a charge is what is used to warn the community.

Regards
DL

I agree that if one is S & M, the Golden Rule is wasted.

It was designed for normal people.

I really don't know why you bothered to give what you did.

Now. Care to try to reply intelligently?

If you were in a victims community, or the parent of a victim, how do you think you should apply the Golden Rule?

I or than what I put just above and not dealing with S & M, it may be better than what I put or what our friend put for sadists.

I must say though, it seems neither of you seem to have a clue as to how to use the moral tenet that the vast majority use as the number one tenet.

Regards
DL

Being condescending doesn't make you any more right. And it makes you appear to be a bit of an a**hole. Maybe you are. I couldn't tell otherwise by your tone here. No better way to spread the Golden Rule than to express it is there? I suppose you must like being insulted then...



I think you're stretching the concept of the Golden Rule to make your argument a moral issue when it is not.



I'm not sure who appointed you keeper of the Golden Rule. I'm not certain as to what makes you think your grasp on it's practical application is any better than anyone else's.

I think YOU are actually the one here who is missing that point. You are showing zero compassion for the people who most deserve it here. If YOU were the victim, there's a very good chance you'd want to be left alone. So leave people alone about it if they don't want to make it an issue. Give people a choice without feeling morally obligated. Isn't that what you would want-- a choice?

that's pretty rich considering you're ignoring the point of the golden rule and are just contorting it to victim blame.

This thread exploded quickly. Speaking from personal experience, are you freaking kidding?

It's incredibly difficult to dig out of the mess of child sexual abuse survivorship to get to the point of accusing the perp even anonymously much less interpersonally. To go through a law suit where people would question you, dig at your childhood motives, accuse you of seeking money, to have to look at the perp across the courtroom, looking at you the way he did back then?? A lot of us end up killing ourselves or shutting down for life first.

If you're lucky you get to a point as a survivor that you just want to move on. Sure, I get the power of silence. But you have no idea what you're dealing with there. Words can't express how wrong all of the above is.

However, Black Sabbath does a pretty good job at capturing the feeling of survivors' rage. They start to touch it.



What in the world possesses you to start a post like this?

I'm not done yet.... At best you are looking at this from a systemic point of view to conclude that the problem would go away if x, therefore those who don't do x are complicit. You could have said the same thing about rape or many other crimes. And gotten the same reaction to this "logic".

Lots of us on the AS, myself included, get nailed by staying stuck on a single track of seemingly correct logic while ignoring context. Context that changes the validity of the logic. You are totally missing the journey that a survivor takes and how re-victimizing it would be to do what you say. The survivors don't owe you or anyone that.

Imagine you're an autistic or aspie kid who gets taken in by the priest. You are good at rules and reasoning, and you want to be good, to avoid trouble. You learn the church rules - the first 5 of the 10 commandments are about duty to god, church and family. The dude starts conditioning you for abuse, by mixing up the rules, by taking small touches that get worse and worse. Eventually it's full-blown abuse in some dark church room, all the while he's talking about the rules and heavenly punishment and confusing stuff, crying and asking for you to save him... while hurting you. Huge mind blowing experiences. Your AS mind struggles to make sense and twisted bizarre rules out of it.

Say this even lands you in the hospital, like me when I was 10 (not from a priest). The priest comes to your bedside in the hospital, surrounded by your parents, praying for your salvation, while making hints in the prayers that you'd better shut up, and also there's more abuse coming when you get out. And so on for months and years.

When you are a young adult, if you can find your way straight through therapy and support, the last place you want to go is back into that dark room with him. You have no facts, just fragmented memories. What were the dates specifically? Sunday. Which sunday? He was in another state that day. What time? What were you wearing? Which room? That room doesn't exist - maybe you remembered wrong. One mistake and the presumption of innocence will fall back on him. He can get away with it so easily, and the worst thing that may have happened to him is he was transferred to another parish.

It would honestly be easier to hunt him down and shoot him, than to go through all of that. Of course, the ramifications of shooting are very bad, so we'll skip that avenue. Hats off to those who have brought the priests to justice, but it's a much harder road than you might ever imagine.

Then of course, most abuse is by parents and family, commandment 5. You don't see many lawsuits about that, do you?

Seems I was correct and you do not know how to apply the Golden Rule here.

Quite simple. We are to protect each other from predators.

Regards
DL

Wow, a little injection of reality really shut that one down quickly. Hope I didn't trigger anyone or anything.

i'm curious how you reconcile the golden rule, the aim of which is compassion towards those worse off with blaming the people that have to slog through having a sexually abused child and all the sh***y things that come with it.

I think the OP is operating under the assumption that the parents are simply taking bribes because they would rather just take the money than deal with such a messy situation.

I would place some blame on the parents if they did this. Key word being if.

I'm not putting any blame on children/teenagers, period. They don't get blame. Once they become adults and work through the trauma (hopefully) I might have to take a more nuanced view. But it's just not as simple as the OP is making it out to be.

More like blaming the parent.

I showed my way of applying the golden Rule yet you naysayers do not like it yet do not show the my misuse or your proper way of using it. Seems that at least two of you have no clue as to how to apply it.

Regards
DL

Rage seeks revenge. Silence is not revenge. It is the humiliation that follows the child as he never gains closure. That is why so many victims lay charges many years after the crime. It takes them that long to grow their balls back, after, more than likely, their parents push them to accept the payoff for their silence.

Regards
DL

Note the compassion for the next victim when the Golden Rule is properly applied.

Your view of doing unto others seems to be to let the perpetrator just go about creating more victims.

Regards
DL