I think Aspergeans should NOT have children

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I know my statement about aspies not having children could be construed as being provocative, especially since some of you claim to have kids, but I honestly believe people like us shouldn't reproduce.

In my case, whenever I think about having kids, I ask myself some of the following questions (and these are just hypothetical questions, as I'd first need to find a woman to reproduce with, which so far seems like an extremely difficult task to accomplish):

1) Why would you want to bring kids to this world to suffer the way you suffered?
2) Why would you want to degenerate the human gene pool even further?
3) Given my neuropsychological condition, am I really fit to raise a child?
4) Given all my flaws and defects, what example will I give my children?

So what do you all think about the way I think in regards to "aspergean reproduction"? Are my views too negative?

(I hope I did not offend anyone with my comments.)

Last edited by Mw99 on 06 Oct 2007, 7:43 am, edited 1 time in total.

no you're just being a twat

I'd love to have little children of my own, thank you.

1) Even though I suffered in middle school, life is getting better now and I am happy. Also, knowing the needs of a child when they are younger (I only heard about Asperger's partway through my junior year of high school) would enable me to alleviate some of that suffering. And anyways, pain is a natural part of growing up for everyone, not just Aspies.
2) I wouldn't be degenerating the human gene pool, I would be preserving some highly valuable skills and wonderful intelligence. I don't want to hear any more eugenicist crap like this. The idea that some people are not fit to reproduce is always a values-based decision of what talents and attributes are more highly prized than others and carries with it the implication that those who are not fit to reproduce are also not fit to live.
3) Yes, as long as you keep your limitations in mind and work to improve in areas where you are weak.
4) That even though no one is perfect, all of us can learn to fill a useful role in society and to succeed in life.

Yes, you have offended me, and probably most of the people who have read your post, quite a bit.

I think abou this all of the time...
I want to have children sometime in the future...but am worried that they will have AS. I wouldn't want my future child to feel the way I did through school, not understanding yourself (and that has gone on my whole life!).
If they have children...their children may have AS...and there for just making more POTENTIALLY un-happy children.
But think of how many sucessful people with AS that there has been...and even famous people!
For example...Thomas Edison, Albert Einstein...and in current time, Bill Gates.
I don't think we would have some of the things we do now if it weren't for those people.
If my future child has AS, then it could go either way, they could be potentially really un-happy or embrace it and use their intellegents to do something great .

I have been thinking about this too. Part of me wants to have kids some day but I cannot stop thinking if I would be a suitable mother. I do not wish to harm anyone.. Society is not that open minded yet and therefore I believe that people with Aspergers will have problems in the nearest future.. But then again, I do NOT think of it as ruining the gene pool, we are wonderful people, just not like the majority.. And I do believe that it is a good thing that all people are not alike, which make me think that maybe what the world needs is actually more of us

I have not decided what I will do about this yet...

/Anna

I would like to have children someday, not everyone with Asperger's syndrome is as unhappy as you might be. I would hope that if I had a kid with AS, I could understand s/he alot better than my parents did because I could understand them much better. I would hope that I could support them as best I could, just like every parent wishes for their kid(s). Even NT parents have NT kids who turn out to have serious problems.

If you ever decided to have children yourself, because I feel you are referring to yourself. I would hope that you would love them enough to see past their flaws and defects, as everyone has them not just people with AS. Remember people with AS are as capable of caring for their own children as any other parent is.

I was actually hurt by the way you phrased things like...'degenerate the human gene pool even more'. You have just made me feel like someone who the government should put down, like I don't belong on earth and am a burden to society and that if I ever had kids they too would be.

I do hope you understand what you have said has hurt alot of people.

IrishEyes.

Though I love kids and tend to be pretty good with them, I don't think I personally should reproduce...and was sterilised by my own choice, age 22 because of it.

Simple reason, there are pretty much 50:50 clinical psychopaths in my mother's family and those odds are a gamble I couldn't take responsibility for taking with the world, let alone myself.

Having said that, I REALLY do not see AS as as even a FACTOR in whether you decide to have children or not.

If you have the means to provide for a child (they are pricey), the love to give a child, and you feel ready for a child...

GO FOR IT

M

MAN are you conceited! You feel that you are the best example of someone with AS, and declare such an opinion.

Actually, by that reasoning, NOBODY should have kids. My problem was with the WORLD, and not my own abilities. Many here echo that sentiment.



And you claim you don't want to offend? Mentally I have endured a lot. I look at my "peers", and realize that I am not that bad. I have no known diseases or allergies.(Personally, I don't count AS as either). I see the hernias and related things as due to malpractice and conspiracy. Even my aorta problem was just wear and tear due to stress and an infection.(MOST that get it are NT, and most don't even make it to the hospital!) I am mentally stable. Physically, I seem fine. Given all the garbage I have been through, I would say GREAT! As for looks? I wouldn't venture an opinion if I am attractive, etc... But I am certainly not ugly in any way.

So I don't see how I could "degenerate the human gene pool". And some here are worse than I am, but some are better. So hey, who are YOU to venture such an opinion?



HECK, have you SEEN some of the idiots raising kids? MOST parents are idiots! Just look at the schools, etc... if you don't believe me. Without schools, half of them probably wouldn't even be able to read or do basic math, and they don't care that much for their kids welfare.



GREAT! You can "JUST SAY NO"! Don't go pushing it on others.

BTW I didn't want to have children when I was younger, BECAUSE OF THE WORLD! TODAY, I wish I had!

OP: that's the moral debate (which I've yet to find an answer I like).

I'll get back if I ever find one.

Actually I do honestly find being told I suffer very offensive thank you.

1) I'm am not suffering and neither is my autistic son, I love him and my non-autistic son very greatly and love having them in my life, they make things so much better.
2) Degenerate the human gene pool further, honestly, the way you're talking and yet you say in your profile you're not sure you have it or not, next minute claim you have a dx, and next you don't... huh? What's with that and you have the nerve to accuse those of us Aspies as parents for degenerating the gene pool... sounds trollish to me.
3) Honestly, maybe you're not fit for it, but I sure am thank you.
4) I set a very good example for my children and all. Just because you don't think you will doesn't mean the rest of us Aspie parents don't.

That's just my honest opinion. THere are many fine parents out there with Asperger's and I do no suffer becuase I have Asperger's. I am not dying of an illness, I'm not in pain...

MW99, clearly you make a case for why YOU shouldn't reproduce. As for the rest of us, you need to mind your own buisness.

whoa, u can't just say that u shouldn't have kids just because of AS. AS is not a degeneration at all, it is a difference. Differences help humanity to progress.
There are people that shouldn't have kids and those are the ones that abuse kids, neglect and abandon them. Another person who should not have kids is this woman who was in the media here a while ago she went through IVF because she wanted a baby then sued the doctor because she ended Twins! (she was an NT)

anyway if u want to have kids and have the necessary physical, emotional and financial capacity to take good care of them then go for it.

Umm.... Who said I suffer? Seriously, a lot of people with Asperger's don't suffer. Asperger's has nothing to do with "happiness" in life, which is a mindset. I certainly don't suffer. Maybe that's hard for you to understand...

I have never had more love....my children have been the greatest gift life has to offer, apart from my fantastic other half.

Overanalyzing the hell out of everything is only bound to set you further back.

I am certain my AS child struggles ONLY because she holds herself back with doubt, avoidance and fear. Otherwise she is the most incredible individual!! !! !

just because something is easier that doesn't mean it is better as just because an NT life is easier that doesn't mean it is better. NT people know how to make it difficult for themselves, too. the same ways to make our own lives more difficult are often used by us, too. although as a person with AS traits i do live more difficult life in some aspects, i know a lot of NT people who are less happy than i am. there is no reason for us not to have children, AS is nothing wrong if you deal with it and moreover most of NT people don't help us to live easier lives either, so if there will be more of us...