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In about 2 hours I am to become my sister's daughter's godfather at her baptism/christening ceremony and while I'm flattered, I feel incredibly uneasy about it.
I am baptised Catholic myself and to be honest I would really love to reverse it, I actually renounce Christ and will just have to 'say the words' at the ceremony.
I just find it incredibly difficult to reconcile indoctrinating someone I care about into something I have absolutely no belief in and and in fact despise. In my opinion religion is something that is detrimental to the progress of the human race, and preys on the fears of those who choose to believe. It's bugging me that we are going through with this just for the sake of social convention.
This is pretty random, but it's beginning to annoy me.

The deed is done. We have another catholic.

Two of my nephews recently were "confirmed" into the the church. Some of my family are not religious but they went because the said "It is family". I did not go because I did not feel there should be occasion to perpetuate ignorance to the next generation.

I remember Confirmation figuring it would be a good idea to think about this s**t a little more before declaring or Confirming myself Catholic. But I know I'd get an earful for daring to question it so I got Confirmed and then later quit the church.

While I disagree with your views on religion as a whole, I also disagree with the idea of someone being "born into" a religion. So, in my half-joking/half-serious way, let me just say, "My condolences."

All parents have the duty to do what they feel is right by their children. Agree or not, one of those things has to be decisions involving religious exposure. As long as my children are under my care, they won't be given a choice regarding church attendance. Though I can stack the odds somewhat, I can't ultimately choose my children's thoughts/beliefs nor can I coerce them into conforming to my own.

Even though I'm from a Protestant denomination and not Catholic, the same principle applies to your niece. Catholic church history records several instances in which things like forced conversion and whatnot took place. The reason why people like me were eventually allowed to live and define our own faith practices is because the Catholics eventually had to come to terms that they could not control people's thoughts no matter what the appearances said. And a lot of things changed once they found out what people really were thinking.

Some Catholics I've gotten to know prefer to think of themselves as Christians first and Catholic second--the first referring to a universal acceptance of Jesus as Savior and the second to a more specific approach to faith. Whether or not your niece comes to faith on her own, I'm sure she'll be a perfectly well-adjusted adult one day with a mind all her own. In the meantime, I'll pray for her.

I had a quick look at canon law, and you are not a valid godfather anyway. In the eye of the Church, you would be an apostate, and therefore under automatic excommunication. It doesn't invalidate the baptism itself, though.

I don't think the actual ceremony will change anything, though. By being present, you show support towards your niece, not towards the Church. Your being there is a nice social gesture. See it as participating in a long tradition. In any case, the brainwashing is up to her parents.

Last edited by enrico_dandolo on 20 May 2012, 8:59 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Canon law is insane.

Pretty much the same for me. I was an altar boy until 11. I only did it for the money, plus I got out of class to work on 10am mass. It was around 9 or 10 when I started to question religion often to the embarrassment of my parents. I found the existence of Dracula more plausible and was quite vocal about it.

ah so nice of you to bereave your children of their choice,
especially in light of your second paragraph

I'll pray for her as well.

Dearest Father in Heaven,
Bless this child and bless this day
Of new beginnings.
Smile upon this child
And surround this child, Lord,
With the soft mantle of your love.
Teach this child to follow in your footsteps,
And to live life in the ways of
Love, faith, hope and charity.

Amon

Ra

My kids can believe whatever that want to believe. But they're still going to go to church! lol

It's an unpleasant thing to ponder, but for us believers eternal separation from God awaits those who don't come to faith. Part of my duty as a father is to protect my children and keep them safe in all areas of life--I get to choose where they go to church, what school they will attend, who babysits them when we can't possibly keep them with us and meet outside obligations, what they're exposed to on TV, what words are acceptable to say around us, who they get to hang out with outside daycare/school/church when we will not be directly supervising them, and any other kinds of things that will impact my children's development in some way. It is a parents' duty to also oversee the spiritual development of his children. If I care about the potential for danger in THIS life, why wouldn't I care even more when it's a matter of eternity? Whether you're a believer or an atheist, I'm sure you'll agree with me at least this much--that this is the only life we get to live. I just happen to believe that there is more awaiting us after death. If you knew that there was only one question in life that meant more than anything else, wouldn't you care enough about your children to do everything you could to see them get that one right?

It's about doing what's best for your children. And I don't mind stacking the odds in favor of making the most important decision they'll ever make. But they will learn that the decision is one THEY have to make for themselves. I think probably most Christians understand that, but I worry that most Christian parents are also totally unaware of just how much influence they have over their children.

If I'm right about faith, then there is a heaven for those who believe. I can give him all the instruction, put him in the right schools, make him go to church, and encourage him all I want. I can make it easier to believe, but he has to take his own walk of faith that I can't take for him.

And think about from an atheistic perspective. I dunno if you have children of your own, but assuming you do or intend to would you teach that all religions are primitive fairy tales and there is no God (or very likely is no God), or would you teach that you do not believe in God but that your child should be exposed to as many beliefs as reasonably possible and make his own mind? If the first option, you're imposing your own opinions. If the second, you're not giving the child an option to opt out. I suppose one might try to mitigate this somewhat by simply making the rounds with churches/covens/virtual worlds/discussion forums, letting the child make the decision, and just go with until the child gets tired of it (given that I'm going into my 5th month of piano lessons with my 4yo, I know it doesn't take long to get tired of things), you're tacitly forcing the child into a single way of looking at things that sharply favors your own.

There's no real way to win here. Quite simply all you can do is make the best choices you can for your children and stick with those decisions.

Although I would probably agree in general, in this case, it is rather sensible. After all, baptism is one of the most important ceremonies in Christianity. It is meant to form the basis of the Christian education of the baptized child. You can't have a non-Christian to educate a child in Christianity. + it is a sacrament, so obviously excommunicates are not allowed, a fortiori apostates.

Of course, this is all theoretical. The fact that you were allowed shows how much the furthering of Christian education through the sacrament of baptism is anachronistic and irrelevant nowadays.