God or Christianity does not appeal to me (long)

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Even though I don't call myself a Christian a lot anymore, God or Christianity didn't seem to appeal to me in one way or another through my lifetime.

One thing that it left with me is the doctrine of the end times. I couldn't accept that God was planning to burn the planet, have there be wars, one day and it is all over.

What freaked me out more was the news stories about having nuclear war from Russia if Hillary Clinton very likely could have been elected as President of the USA. Even I wonder why people hate Donald Trump so much if his victory averted such catastrophe. Are they insane? I even still freak out about the fact that something else will happen to Trump or impeachment. That's a real possibility.

Anyway, election babbling aside, Christian counseling was a moot point. They thought God was the only comfort in my life. Many well-meaning Christians and even spiritual studies on the afterlife have said that once up there, our human sexuality becomes redundant, and we love each other all the same no matter what. I thought how could God be so cruel and not care about human individuality? It's sad enough that I am a virgin on this earth so far. The Muslims have ISIS, but at least their theology is supposed to appeal to heterosexual men because of the virgins thing. Heaven in the bible only sounds like it appeals to women who have less of a natural appetite for sex than men do.

I always didn't like how the religion always "picked on" men and boys for their sexuality. Why are they saying the bible or God or Christianity is prejudiced against women?

Though, if I can believe in a more general concept of God, that's better. I sometimes'd rather die into oblivion. That may suck a lot too, but at least I won't fear for "missing out" on something earthly and joyful.

I have other objections to Christianity too.