why did he do it??

Post Reply New Topic

Well, it's the same old story, really... nothing fancy...

Our hero, Mr. Proto-Amphibian, has a bit of a gambling problem... seahorse racing, in particular...

So he maaaay have gotten into *a little bit* of debt trouble with a local loan shark, Mr. G. White.

Now, Mr. White suggested that they'd meet over dinner and sort things out... but people who Mr. G. White dine onwith are oddly enough never heard from again...

So Mr. Proto-Amphibian decided it was time to skip town for good... the Atlantic wasn't big enough for both of them, anyway...

She knew she should have taken that left turn at Albuquerque.

He was a weird mutant so different from the rest of the other fish that he had this crazy idea to get off the water. What I'm wondering, what did he have sex with? I guess a few women followed him "oh look at Bill, he's so brave, hes not like the other guys"

Illicit rendezvous where she wouldn’t be interrupted.
First time for sex on the beach.

Someone threw a Reggie bar in the pool

He *didn't* do it.

It was the one-armed man...

Obviously, this citizen fish is a 'fish born out of water'. He does not belong with the other fishes. It's an act of rebellion.

The oxygen may have killed him eventually, but it was worth it too see the other side of the world. A step into the unknown.

It's one small step for fish, one giant leap for citizen fish kind.

Reptilians are another thing entirely. They are shapeshifters that form the shape of a human too gain political power.

/\I haven’t ran for office..yet.

She was playing Truth or Dare and opted for dare.
Or she was avoiding jury duty.

It was because they were given a peerage and to this day they are still in the House of Lords....

To enter law school, the origin of all lawyers.

Some men aren't looking for anything logical, like money.

They can't be bought, bullied, reasoned, or negotiated with.

Some men just want to watch the world burn.

... and that's pretty hard to do underwater!

DONALD TRUMP: "I've been told by my many sources, good sources -- they're very good sources -- that the proto-amphibian left the pond.  All the Fake News wants to do is write nasty things about the pond, but it's a really good pond.  It's a beautiful pond.  The best.  Everyone knows how great it is."

JOE BIDEN: "Why did the proto-amphibian do the... thing in the... you know the rest."

GOV. ANDREW CUOMO: "The proto-amphibian must wear a mask!  If not for himself then to protect other proto-amphibians!"

VICE PRESIDENT MIKE PENCE: "It is advised that the proto-amphibian voluntarily, under specific circumstances, wear a mask but is not required to do so although the science is telling us it's possible tho highly unlikely a mask will help the proto-amphibian."

SARAH PALIN: "The proto-amphibian left the pond because, gosh-darn it, he's a maverick!"

BARACK OBAMA: "Let me be perfectly clear, if the proto-amphibians like their ponds they can keep their ponds.  No proto-amphibian will be required to leave the pond or surrender it.  Period."

AOC: "Proto-amphibians should not be forced to stay in their ponds!"

HILLARY CLINTON: "What difference at this point does it make why the proto-amphibian left the pond, as long as she was free to leave it?"

GEORGE W. BUSH: "We don't really care why the proto-amphibian left the pond.  We just want to know if the proto-amphibian is on our side of the pond or not.  The proto-amphibian is either with us or against us.  There is no middle ground here."

DICK CHENEY: "Where's my gun?"

BILL CLINTON: "I was not in the pond with that proto-amphibian."

AL GORE: "I invented the proto-amphibian."

JOHN KERRY: "Although I voted to let the proto-amphibian leave the pond, I am now against it!  It was the wrong road to leave the pond, and I was misled about the proto-amphibian's intentions.  I am not for it now, and will remain against it."

AL SHARPTON: "Why are none of the proto-amphibians black?"

DR. PHIL: "The problem we have here is that this proto-amphibian won't realize that she must first deal with the problem in her own pond before she goes after other proto-amphibians' problems on the land.  What we need to do is help her realize how stupid she is acting by not taking on her current problems before adding any new problems."

ANDERSON COOPER: "We have reason to believe there is a proto-amphibian, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the pond it allegedly left or the land it allegedly occupied."

NANCY GRACE: "That proto-amphibian left the pond because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks."

PAT BUCHANAN: "To steal the job of a decent, hardworking proto-American."

DR. SEUSS: "Did the proto-amphibian leave the pond?  Did she cross it with a toad?  Yes, the proto-amphibian left the pond, but why she left I've not been told."

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: "To die in the rain, at night, alone."

GRANDPA: "In my day we didn't ask why the proto-amphibian left the pond.  Somebody told us the proto-amphibian left the pond, and that was good enough for us."

ALBERT EINSTEIN: "Did the proto-amphibian really leave the pond, or did the pond remove itself from beneath the proto-amphibian?"