Not everyone can be a winner.

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"Some trees flourish, others die. Some cattle grow strong, others are taken by wolves. Some men are born rich enough and dumb enough to enjoy their lives. Ain't nothing fair. You know that." - John Marston, Red Dead Redemption

"Reality is often disappointing." - Thanos, Avengers: Infinity War

Harsh but true.

(I posted it here because philosophy is in the name, hope it fits)

Last edited by Feyokien on 14 Oct 2020, 7:36 pm, edited 1 time in total.: removed inflammatory title

You also have to know what to do with yourself in times of peace as well.

Seems like there are people who are good at handling times of war and bring it with them during times of peace - thus they can't find any. Then you have the almost dyed-in-the-wool cooperative types where when everyone starts defecting the world gives way beneath them and they're left to the mercy of the elements - that doesn't end well either.

Trying to train myself to be more flexible in this regard and at least be ready for my environment's allowances at a given time. I really try to hold the line within myself so as not to let unfavorable outward conditions charge their way inward too far but even there success varies with severity.

I'm not dealing with it!

I strive to always try to be a winner----even if I lose sometimes.

These are both fictional characters. What exactly are you trying to say?

It started out with the intent of saying just because you have poor skills at certain things does not make you a loser. That was and is good.

It has turned into this whole “participation trophy” thing which is a form of denial. It is fundamentally flawed and harmful as it does not take into account that we as individual humans are bad at certain things.

Not everything is a competition. Evolution is most often not about survival of the fittest but about survival of the fit enough to survive. It's a huge difference.

I'd agree with that.

What used to be a situation where people knew that putting in extra effort would grant a better reward has devolved into a form of indoctorination where people are conditioned to believe that striving to excel has no value, either for them personally, or for society as a whole, as meeting the minimum level (regardless of how low it may be) is all that matters.

I'm not the "fittest" in many aspects----so I had to develop strategies to counteract my "less fit" aspects in order to keep my head above water.

This is why, on my 18th birthday, I said "forget the past," so I can move beyond all the bullying and all the bad stuff that happened before I was 18. And there was lots of "bad" stuff (though, in relative terms, only moderately "bad").

I believe in striving to be a "winner." But not to get too worked up if I come up "not a winner." At least I made the attempt, I always say.

You Need A Lot Of Self-Confidence To Carry You Through All The Failure You'll Experience If You Want To Succeed In Any Competitive Domain.

Just because you're not a "winner"----doesn't mean you're a "loser." There are many gray areas in between...

I came in about 7,500th place in the 1997 NYC Marathon. I'm still proud of my achievement, even though I was not a "winner," per se.

Last edited by kraftiekortie on 15 Oct 2020, 8:19 am, edited 2 times in total.

... where real achievement is devalued as 'luck', and where anyone who does achieve real success is called a thief, a narcissist, a manipulator, a liar, a cheat, et cetera, ad nauseum...

PFFT!!

The second person to win a race is also the first person to lose the race.

There can be only one winner, no matter what euphemisms you use to make the losers feel better.

Also not everything should be to do with pre-set winning and losing categories.

Thinking it did was what made me ill, made me put up with relationships I wasn't interested in (cos single = loser in some people's eyes), made me not act like myself.

Winning is about being happy.

We should be striving towards a world where everyone can be happy.

But mental illness exists so this shouldn't be putting all the onus on the individual. And ordinary emotions exist so it's unrealistic to be happy all the time - more like, it should be a major part of life to be happy/content with sadness/feeling trapped/feeling angry only happening sometimes.

If you're mentally unwell, do what it takes to keep healthy.
If you're mentally well, do wht it takes to maximise happiness in your life without hurting others.

I disagree. People may have a variety of goals.
A lot of people train for marathons with a goal of finishing it at all or finishing it with a better time than previous year's. Are they losers for achieving their own goals?

Coming in second in a PGA golf tournament sometimes will gain you a million dollars.

Even coming in about 20th may gain you $100,000.

Last edited by kraftiekortie on 15 Oct 2020, 8:31 am, edited 1 time in total.

Someone who worries about what other people think, and who lives according to other people's "standards" has already "lost the game".

When I stopped worrying (and I mean worrying) about what other people think of me is when I started rally experiencing success.  So what if they whine and complain that I took advantage of the situation to elevate myself above the norm?  Who the ████ cares?  While they were busy partying and socializing and carrying on about superficial matters, I was busy earning my degrees and learning how to succeed.

It sucks to be them now, and that's just the way it is!