Coming out as an atheist to casual fundie parents.

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I've never really shared my family's religion. For the first 14\15 years I believed it was true, but didn't want to actually practice it because of ... aspects I disagreed with, giving up hobbies, studying text I wasn't interested in,etc. I intended to get more serious sometime, but never did. Over the years after, I slowly came to the realization that it was fake.
The straw that broke that camel's back was the bit about ignoring any argument about why your religion might be fake. Something about it just set off an alarm and I thought there was something rather fishy going on. I searched for debunking and found former fundamentalist Winston Wu's comprehensive document (at his site Happier Abroad) on the religion's dirty secrets. Many things I can't relate to my parents (pr0n, Something Awful forums devotion,etc.) for fear of dire consequences.
The pro is that they trust me completely and when I asked (out of innocent curiosity, I said) what they would do if I became an atheist, the simply said that would hope that I turn around. I recently lost all my pr0n,games,manga,etc. because my computer expert, but strong Christian brother was handling the transition. I didn't want him to discover it and make my life hell, so I chose to lose ALL of it. Please advise me on coming out if I ever muster up the courage to do it.

well goodluck. im shure it wont be that bad

I think this is one of those battles that I wouldn't bother with...My view though is always, "don't ask if you're not willing to hear the truth...don't ask if you only want to hear what you agree with..." So, I wouldn't say anything...let them continue on their merry way...but if you are ever directly ask, I say, you tell them what you think and do not hide anything.

how do your parents/brother react when the subject of atheism (in general, not related to you) comes up?

it's good to be cautious here - in some families, coming out atheist is worse than coming out gay.

Never believed in God myself. Polytheism seems to debunk any ridiculous claims made by organized religion. But I guess it's all in what it means to you. After all, we're our own, and only, model for God.

I took a look at the Happier Abroad site and went to the pages linked by "debunking christians" and read the introduction he writes. Sounds interesting and I'll probably read through all of what he writes there, to get the flavor of it. I notice that he says he is a pantheist, which is probably close enough to atheist to make no difference to most Christians in the US. But I've never read a site specifically targeted at fundamentalists and evangelicals and I expect to learn some more about life around them from reading, which may prove useful from time to time.

I wish I had advice for you. I was raised Catholic, went through catechism and up to the point of Confirmation, but held short. By then, I had realized it was bunk. The difference is, around Catholics in the west-coast side of the US, telling them that you don't believe in their God is accepted without so much as a whimper. So I didn't have to walk through fire pits to tell people to let me be and, 'goodby, see you later.' More, I had no problem attending Catholic Universities (they take anyone's money) and pursuing theology with them. Their theology courses, from my experience, are absolutely excellent and as professional and educational as religious studies/theology can be at any of the better universities. I didn't even know that my first year theology course teacher was a Catholic nun until near the end of the 2nd semester when I came up after class to ask what she believed (I couldn't tell from the two classes I'd taken from her.) Their coursework I experienced is just that thorough and steadfastly scholarly.

So it's a very different thing for me and I can't offer you much advice from experience. It's always been easy to see that fundamentalism has both feet stuck in Leviticus 19 through 21 and almost certainly never got much past Job, let alone, god forbid, up to Jesus's Sermon on the Mount. Hard for me to figure that out, because it almost seems as though fundamentalists see Jesus as the anti-Christ and if he's seen that way, then who in the heck do they use for their own Jesus if not Matthew's and Luke's?

Anyway, best of luck to you. You probably know better about your own situation than any of us. So trust what you know and be safe.

Jon

you said that basically, your parents trust you - and thats the best base there is for getting this over well, i think.

after all, they know you for your entire life, and if someone knows you to be a decent person, its them. in your place, i wouldnt go all out anti-religion war - just state that religion might be okay for some people, but it just doesnt work for you - and pretending so wouldnt be the optimal solution either. as long as your elders realize you're not changing in person, and from the first day after your coming out are planning on smoking pot, visiting brothels and murdering people, i guess you will be fine.

That totally sucks, man. No offense to your parents but fundies scare the living hell out of me. Just remember to go by what your heart tells you and not necessarily by what some ancient book says.

This might help http://www.atheists.org/comingout/othercloset.html
http://www.atheistsforhumanrights.org/#philosophy
Hiding this from your family long term will not work you need to tell it's better for your mental heath. You say they hope you would turn back says to me that they will not disown you so tell them and go from there

If you do tell your folks about being an atheist, I really recommend you convert back (sincerely or insincerely, your choice) to religion on your deathbed. It'll give your folks a lot of peace of mind. Your choice though.

I came out an atheist to my mom and she suddenly acted like I had cancer or something.

I just think that the idea of Jewish carpenter coming back from a needless death to help people who are too dumb and selfish to be saved is rather far-fetched.

the existence of multiple religions with different codes debunks God anyway.
i'm not totally irreligious though, I did at one point consider Satanism!

how's about just abstaining from the conversation of religion at the dinner table and just silently shake your head in disagreement.

if you want to take it a step further, grunt when some religious zealot says something ignorant, make an audible, disgusted grunt. Or even make the "Mmm Hmm" sound when someone tried to defend or assert their beliefs.

Subtle things, young padawan. They'll get the point without you having to speak a word.

You don't say what your situation is as regards your dependence on your family. For example, how independent are you? Do you have your own transportation or access to transportation? Are you working? Do you have a source of income outside of your family. Is your family's attitude "It's our house and as long as you live in it you will do as we say or else?" If so, you may want to rethink "coming out" until you are no longer a dependent minor. Otherwise you may spend the rest of that time locked in a power struggle you may not win. Remember, whoever controls you economically controls your life. In my opinion there are more productive uses of time and energy.

As a teenager I did not have the freedom that many adolescents these days take for granted. My parents were able to control me by denying me access to transportation and money. There weren't many opportunities for me to break free. Because I could not participate as an equal the other teens soon stopped asking me to go places with them. ("I wonder why she doesn't have any friends," my parents would lament to themselves when they thought I couldn't hear.) I soon learned that it was much, much better to bide my time, keep my thoughts and wishes to myself, and when the opportunity came when I had both money and transportation, to run like hell. I am still in touch with my family, but there is so much they do not know about me and probably never will. Because now I have MY house and I can do what I want, and they have THEIR house and they can do what they want. It's sad, but it will never change.

So that is something you might want to consider before deciding to come out. Whether it is worth the price you might have to pay.

Even though no one griped about it, I apologize for my lack of presence in my thread. I tend to forget important stuff (like daily e-mail checking) for weeks at a time. I usually don't recall something like that until the precise situation where I need it. In/Dependent wise, i'm on SSI,for which my parents handle the purchasing of clothes and such. The funds do cover my needs and wants, AFIK. I'm content to sit on my arse and read what's public of the SomethingAwful forums. My parents want me do more, though. Outside the internet, I mean.
I honestly think this'll wind being like a typical SomethingAwful E/N thread (that thread type isn't allowed there anymore, btw) where the OP is too scared of unfavorable consequences to act on any suggestions. Thanks, though.