Is Jesus merely a temptation to people who are lonely?

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MikeH106
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25 Apr 2009, 9:49 am

I've been drawing up a theory of Christianity as a tool of oppression against the romantically unsuccessful. It sounds quite sadistic and uses plenty of excertps from the New Testament.

As I write this, I feel like I'm swarming with the flesh-eating maggots of human stupidity. I had to yell about all the world's problems with my brother in the room just to overcome a rage spiral.

Anyway, let me explain how it goes. According to this theory, Christianity is designed to lure the less attractive away from romantic pursuits into a lifestyle of submission, meekness, and childlike humility, in the hope that they will be rewarded someday. But although they spend their lives in suffering servitude, this reward never actually comes. This 'gong' of death before reward allows people to steal from others' false hopes, and thereby creates religion.

Christians as a group, according to my theory, are roughly divided into Christian enjoyers and Christian servants. The enjoyers get to have sex and be merry, while the servants gather around Jesus Christ like flies around a bugzapper. Having fewer ways to find true fulfillment on Earth, they are more influenced by the false promise of Heaven as an alternative.

If this is true, then one may ask whether God is really Satan. If religion is the ultimate lie, then perhaps the distinction between God and Satan is illusory, and God is (again, for lack of a better term) a F***ing Sadist.

In fact, the whole of Christianity might easily be seen to be a sadist's religion simply by the fact that enjoyment in Heaven is promised alongside the suffering of victims in Hell. How else, other than by being a sadist, could you be that happy alongside the damned?

If you are made angry by this, then I know how you feel, I don't want you to be in pain, and I encourage you to share your thoughts constructively while remembering that from our point of view, this is still only a theory.


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Thandurin
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25 Apr 2009, 10:13 am

Where did you get the idea that only the romantically unsuccessful are Christians? The majority of people I meet at church seem to either be married with children or in a romantic relationship, I'm just not sure where you got your assumption.



MikeH106
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25 Apr 2009, 10:26 am

Thandurin wrote:
Where did you get the idea that only the romantically unsuccessful are Christians? The majority of people I meet at church seem to either be married with children or in a romantic relationship, I'm just not sure where you got your assumption.


I did not make that assumption.

First, I give you only a theory of what might underlie Christianity, and second, I tell you that according to this theory Christians are divided into people who are romantically successful, and people who aren't.


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Sand
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25 Apr 2009, 10:56 am

MikeH106 wrote:
Thandurin wrote:
Where did you get the idea that only the romantically unsuccessful are Christians? The majority of people I meet at church seem to either be married with children or in a romantic relationship, I'm just not sure where you got your assumption.


I did not make that assumption.

First, I give you only a theory of what might underlie Christianity, and second, I tell you that according to this theory Christians are divided into people who are romantically successful, and people who aren't.


And the rest of humanity is free from this plague?



MikeH106
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25 Apr 2009, 11:38 am

Sand wrote:
And the rest of humanity is free from this plague?


No.

In fact, nothing could be more annoying to a lonely non-Christian than to be hounded on matters of the 'Savior' and the afterlife, when he really wants a hug.

Sometimes I just cry about how mean people can be.


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richardbenson
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25 Apr 2009, 2:41 pm

there can only be a couple of possibilities for me as to who jesus was, 1. he was who he said he was 2. he was menally ill or 3. he was an alien
im pretty shure he existed because i doubt people would die for him. although people are pretty stupid, so this wouldnt suprise me if they died for nothing



MikeH106
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25 Apr 2009, 4:03 pm

Add this:

4. He intended to pacify the lower classes on matters of sexual inadequacy by means of discouragement and a lying promise.

Thus we have passages like Matthew 5:27: "But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your eye causes you to sin, tear it out ..." But wait a minute! What is lustful intent? Jesus never tells you. He simply warns you that if you break the Unknown Rule (ring a bell?) then Mr. Boogeyman will come out to punish you. The lesson? Don't look at women.

And then we have Matthew 18:3: "Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven." As an adult, how can you become like a child? Simple: by not having sex.

Obviously, these teachings have the potential to be quite distressing to the romantically unsuccessful (like me). So they throw in a few more teachings about punishment for being happy and reward for being sad.

This is what I mean when I say that Christianity might just be a tool of oppression against the less attractive.

On a side note, how many women actually like the idea of their babies growing up only to be thrown into Hellfire? Does that move you into bliss? Do you like to think of yourself comfy-cozy in a hammock in Heaven while someone's baby rots in Hell below you?

I don't.


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Last edited by MikeH106 on 25 Apr 2009, 4:12 pm, edited 1 time in total.

richardbenson
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25 Apr 2009, 4:08 pm

those are all metaphors i believe. he wasnt saying to physically tear your eyes out or become like children, more rather being in control over your own body and not lusting after women, and believing without seeing as children do i think .



MikeH106
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25 Apr 2009, 4:24 pm

Love and lust: what's the difference?

How do we know that 'lust' isn't simply the name women give to an ugly man's love?



Last edited by MikeH106 on 25 Apr 2009, 4:24 pm, edited 1 time in total.

sinsboldly
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25 Apr 2009, 4:24 pm

richardbenson wrote:
those are all metaphors i believe. he wasnt saying to physically tear your eyes out or become like children, more rather being in control over your own body and not lusting after women, and believing without seeing as children do i think .


oh! like he was speaking in parables or something?

Merle


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MikeH106
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25 Apr 2009, 4:25 pm

Was that sarcasm, Merle?

I really get the impression that some of you are being mean.


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richardbenson
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25 Apr 2009, 4:29 pm

sarcasm rules. i have trouble with very complex sarcasms but the simple ones like merles is easy for me to figure out, :lol:

and i guess we cold argue about every possible aspect. unfortunaltely i dont think religion or any diety was supose to be this confusing. men tend to make it confusing though :wink:



McTell
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25 Apr 2009, 4:30 pm

MikeH106 wrote:
Love and lust: what's the difference?

How do we know that 'lust' isn't simply the name women give to an ugly man's love?



Lust is a powerful appetite and relish for physical love. It has nothing to do with a person's physical attractiveness, nor their gender.

Love has a broader meaning than lust.



MikeH106
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25 Apr 2009, 4:32 pm

If you ask me, following the masochistic doctrines of Jesus Christ as a virgin is a bit like huffing glue while trapped in a cage. You wouldn't do it if you had better circumstances.

And thank you for attempting to define 'lust.' Now we must ask, What is lustful intent?


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richardbenson
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25 Apr 2009, 4:36 pm

when i was at my sisters house yesterday i was watching some of the religious channels and god actually has his own station. its called god tv. :lol:
some annoying lady was on there selling her fall of lucifer book. compairing it to harry potter, and JK rowling or whatever her name is. i just about died laughing because she was most convinced that three brothers? all angels are about to fight over mens souls..

.. :lol:



McTell
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25 Apr 2009, 4:43 pm

MikeH106 wrote:
If you ask me, following the masochistic doctrines of Jesus Christ as a virgin is a bit like huffing glue while trapped in a cage. You wouldn't do it if you had better circumstances.


I'm don't understand what you mean. Please forgive me, but would you explain?

MikeH106 wrote:
And thank you for attempting to define 'lust.' Now we must ask, What is lustful intent?


I didn't attempt to define lust. I looked it up in a dictionary.

Anyway, lustful intent would be having an intent to do something lustful, I'd imagine. Rap music is filled with examples of lustful intent, or so I've heard.