Woman throws autistic 6 year old son off bridge

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And I am SICK to my stomach as I speak with other moms of autistic kiddos who in some way say "they just can't judge her because well, they understand?they have been so close"?WTH? Ugh, I can't deal with them. I try so very hard to be supportive, to help with their kiddos but NONE give a rat's behind about learning what people with autism feel, what they think, what they need?instead they go around talking about how horrible life is and how everyone needs to help them but they could care LESS about listening to their kids point of view or other autistic's point of view. I may need to leave the ONLY group that I joined SOLELY for the purpose of my autistic son having friends similar to him?because honestly, the BS victim from the mothers is disgusting!

If life is so horrible with one's autistic kid, put him/her in foster care. Oh no, I can't do that, I LOVE HIM! Well, they sure have a weird definition of "love". Kelli Stapleton "loved" her daughter almost to death, killing her was "compassionate" so she (Issy or Kelli?) wouldn't "suffer". Kelli jabbered on and on about how she loved her daughter and wouldn't put her in foster care even though Kelli was cracking under the strain of caring for somebody who beat her to a pulp on average every six minutes. Giving Issy up to the state might have meant that Issy would get the help she needed. But no, "she is ours and we love her!". Martyrdom is profitable, they never had attention before but now they do, so they kill the kid because they will be fawned over.

I hate martyrs and I think keeping violent kids in your home with your other children is child abuse.

AUTISTICADVOCACY.ORG: "Statement on the Murder of London McCabe" (November 4, 2014)
http://www.autisticadvocacy.org/2014/11 ... don-mccabe

Some people have no business being parents.

If you feel you come so close to killing your kid, get help and put them in foster care.

There definitely is martyr syndrome amongst many parents, esp. mothers, of autistic children.

And retribution will really solve the problem of inadequate services for those that need them won't it now

I have just read the link proper. Can't help but wonder wether anyone that calls for this woman to be killed has ever felt real despair in their own lives

Don't forget the mothers whom put up with lousy partners for the sake of the children, plenty of them too

Or the fathers whom put up with lousy partners for the sake of the children, plenty of them too.

Ironically, she was the sick one in the family.

Of course it wouldn't solve that problem, just not cool with people killing defenseless children. Also yeah I have felt that have attempted suicide and have been suicidal more than once since then so yeah I have felt 'real despair', though I do not feel such feelings would in any way justify killing a child. Unless she was psychotic or something and not entirely aware what she was doing, that is one thing but knowingly choosing to kill your child rather than do the right thing and put them up for adoption is not something that gets my sympathy.

Foster Care is better than dead, but not the panacea people make it out to be.

http://autismallianceofmichigan.org/bjs-story/

My friend works for the state as a social worker.(the above is story is not on her case load) Cases like the above give her the biggest ulcer. There are almost no homes to place LF ASD kids, and residential centers have so few beds, and long waits. Her client may bounce from respite home to respite home until a long term residential treatment bed opens up. Even then, that placement runs out after 6 months or earlier.The respite homes have people who are trained to work with the ASD population, but only commit to a month or a few weeks.

Once a LF ASD client turns 15, the chances of adoption are nil. Now my friend has to really to find a place, any place that will take her now ward of the state client before they hit 18 and age out foster care. We aren't talking best fit, we are talking any fit.

I get the above is better than being tossed off the bridge, but for the ASD child, it is a nightmare. You can run through a half a dozen foster homes in a year. Ward of the state means you have a government pencil pusher deciding your fate. You probably won't see your siblings again due to being moved all over the state. Some foster parents do try to keep contact, and sometimes it's decided it isn't in your or your sibs best interest to forge any relationship.

When people keep suggesting foster care, I wonder how much they know about the system. I would rather spend the monies to keep the children with their bio families.

The foster care system certainly needs some major improvements. And I am all for money going into keeping children with bio families...but if their bio family wants to kill or hurt them obviously keeping them with their bio family is a bad idea, unless there are other biological family members who would take care of them without causing them harm or death.

This really is one of the things that gives me sleepless nights, if my wife and I were to "kick the proverbial bucket". Unfortunately none of my extended family (nor my wife's family) have chosen to have a relationship with my ASD daughter. SO that leaves foster care as the only option left. Not meaning to be insensitive but any wonder why suicidal mothers of autistic kids decide to kill their child along with themselves.

I'm a cynic when it comes to adoption/foster care having spent part of my youth in the system myself. And seen the parents that do it for totally the wrong reasons. (and good ones).
My own DD got too much for me to handle a year ago. She was 9, on the point of shutdown and everything said was a discussion that lead to an argument.
It's about admitting defeat and society looks down on those that admit defeat. DD is HFA and boarding at the moment. She has learned a lot over the last year and so have I. I listen to very few. And am very opinionated as to how we procede further.
But it hasn't made me friends. More of a curiosity because I seem impervious to their judgements. Seriously though, in the end I couldn't care less what the world thinks of me. But most people are not that thick-skinned. And DD is doing great. We did make the right decision at the time

I'm not cool with parents that kill their children either but I am even less cool with a system that sees those kids as collateral damage and punishes for no other reason than retribution.
I could provide endless links of the same storyline, one that stands me by is a guy jumping of a balcony in Greece with his little ones in hand. One survived. http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle ... cony-crete
This woman has to live with what she has done. She will probably have a harder time with it then the balcony guy but ultimatelly there is something fundamentally wrong with the society we live in which is leading to more and more people 'snapping'.

Edited for typos

Last edited by guzzle on 07 Nov 2014, 7:31 am, edited 1 time in total.