it was 20 years ago today :( [Princess Diana]

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Hurtloam, when you consider that people still want to talk about the Titanic, the Holocaust, hell even things that happened in Tudor time, I think it's kind of redundant to talk about "letting it go now."

It's not a case of "letting go" or not letting go. People will always be interested in things that happened in the world, particularly when it was unexpected, unusual, or something that was deemed not supposed to happen for many reasons.

That's true of natural weather events as well as accidents or human intrigue. It's human to discuss it.

Lots of people are interested in doing so, others don't care for it. But for those who don't want to discuss, it's none of your business if others do.

Why bother posting on a thread FOR discussion of this, if you want to tell people to stop posting about it?

One woman isn't the same as the holocaust. Come on.

She was just one woman who I was made sick if the sight of while she was alive. She always creeper me out. Reminds me very much of a flatmaye I had. When I see Diana I think- borderline personality disorder.

We have a thread here about our thoughts on her and these are my thoughts. Why does that threaten you?

I'm sure her family miss her very much, but I'll never understand people's obsession with celebrity.

I think it's sad that Meghan Markel is being hounded by photographers because the general public want a bit of her just because she's going out with Prince Harry.

If people stopped talking about them and consuming articles and images of them these people would be a lot happier.

BIF, it's interesting what you say there because I write a regular blog about whatever interests me, and I often focus on things that happened sometime ago. The most recent one was about the Isle of Man Summerland fire on 2 August 1973 in which 50 people died. There's still an active Facebook page about it, and an annual memorial organized by survivors of that terrible day.

Occasionally I write about current events too but I'm always interested in finding out more about things that happened long ago and which in many cases have never been solved (disappearances etc).

Hurtloam, have you considered that Diana's personality changed after she met Charles and became exposed to the limelight - she wasn't a celeb growing up and was working as a nursery school teacher if my memory serves me right - so she always had a soft spot for children. Her wish to assist both children and adults in need wasn't to grab attention but because she always had the desire to help others. Her fame placed her in a better position to do so. Her disorder came later when she felt neglected - she's by no means the only person who sought to alleviate her depression and loneliness through whatever means at her disposal once she realized the marriage she was in wasn't a fairytale.

Hurtloam, I am not "obsessed with celebrity" nor even with the royal family, who I actually cannot stand. I'm sick of the sight of THEM in the same way you were with Diana.

And I'm not "threatened" by anything you post. I just will not be told what to effing DO or post. I will NOT be instructed to just shut up in essence, in not so many words. Why not YOU instead? It's equally valid to tell you to stop moaning about what others want to discuss.

I just can never see the point in why someone who expresses a differing opinion also wants to tell others to basically just stop talking about it.

I get someone posting "Couldn't stand her, is what my thought are about it." But to also moan that anyone is talking about her at all -- then just don't click on the thread if you feel that sick of it all.

It's because I think it's a colossal misfortune to get entangled with that family that I too feel sorry for Meghan Markle AND DIANA.

So your compassion goes to Meghan in full, but you only have contempt for the other young woman? She was once in much the same position and didn't really know what she was getting into.

And as envirozentinel points out, her issues only came up and caused problems as the marriage proceeded into brazen coldness and neglect on his part, and the rest of the family.

Why don't you just carry on loathing the woman while not attacking those who don't mind talking about her on an ANNIVERSARY?

And by the way, nice work picking out ONLY the Holocaust in my examples, when I also mentioned all manner of les dramatic things.

MY POINT is ANYTHING that happens which causes a stir will forever be fair game for discussion, Don't cherry pick things to moan about in my post.

I remember thinking to myself, Christ, we'll never hear the end of this and I was right. Then I watched about half of the UK turn into emotional idiots, crying over someone they thought they knew, because she on TV so much. It was quite pathetic, really. Bottom line, if she didn't look attractive or appear in the media, they would not have cared a damn. The whole business showed up the difference between NT's and us. How many of us would cry for a person we did not know? Where's the logic in that? She died, but so did lots of people that day. Sad, but of no interest to anyone with any logic. It's sad is a family member or loved one dies. It can be sad if a great person dies, because they benefited everyone. It is not sad if an aristocratic airhead dies.

I hope they don't use how I feel about LD as part of my ASD assessment otherwise I am clearly an NT in your opinion ( I didn't cry though )

SaveFerris, don't worry. Some people here who are of the exceedingly logical, cooler-emotion type, don't understand the type of spectrum person who does experience a few more emotional reactions, and tend to accuse that type of brain as "NT" like that's an insult. Don't worry about it.

There are lots of great articles out there speculating on why many, many people -- and it is clearly an enormously large group of people -- feel something when a public figure dies whom they do not know.

The psychology behind this phenomenon is both elegantly simple yet also complex in its structure. It's very interesting and many understand that it's also quite legitimate.

And "logic" doesn't come into it. Not everything is about logic. That's the "yin and yang" of life.

Emotional reaction would not even exist anymore if there had been no evolutionary or survival use for it. But there actively is, and there are all kinds of ways it manifests.

I believe none of those various ways are a waste of time. They connect us to our empathy for another.

Exactly, you didn't cry and I bet you didn't stand on the cortege route wailing or throwing flowers at a coffin. I'm not trying to insult anyone here, but for most of us (who have less empathy than most NT's), we do not feel the need to live life like its the Oprah Winfrey show, with lots of false emotion and feeling each others pain. Sounds cold, perhaps, but I think it's better than living in an orgy of shallow emotion.

I can see what you are trying to say, but the Diana phenomenon has been studied by eminent psychologists as an outstanding example of 'mass hysteria', the way some people pick up and amplify the emotions of others, until a crowd becomes utterly irrational. As outsiders, I would expect most people on the spectrum to not get swept up in this sort of things. One thing we are not, is part of the herd.

I am the last person to go against another's views, however, it cannot go unsaid that your comment is profoundly disturbing and heartless. The loss of a single life holds no less value or importance, than the loss of many lives.

Your comment concerning human life, as well as Borderline Personality Disorder is incredibly disheartening and concerning. A person's mental condition, makes them no less human - no less of a human being, no less worthy of living, nor deserving of such, profoundly, little regard or respect. And if I may add - comparing your 'flatmate' to others with the condition, is wrong, on many levels. I will share with you, that I have a friend - a friend I made here, on this forum in fact, who has BPD, who happens to be one of the most loyal, caring, compassionate and empathetic of all people, who I have come to know, in my lifetime. It is extremely disheartening to read what you have written, here, whether a BPD diagnosed person has the character traits I have described, or not. A single human life is equally as valuable and important, as the lives of many.

No I didn't go because I lived far away, but if I lived in London I probably would of, and felt emotional, but no wailing would of happened ( I'd of thrown a flower - maybe ). I know your not deliberately trying to insult anyone , I am not insulted by your views , maybe they appear a little cold but it takes all sorts to make the world turn.

From what I've read, people on the spectrum show typical levels of empathy ( whatever that means ) , it is people with alexithymia ( something like 50% of the autistic community have alexithymia ) who have difficulty with empathy ( who knows the exact culprit when it comes to difficulty with empathy )

I wasn't affected by her death either. I was in the 6th grade when she died and I had never even heard of her until I heard "did you know Princess Diana died yesterday?" and I didn't even know who she was. I remember it was made a big deal and even the local radio station in my area played her favorite song over and over as a memorial for her death. I never got emotional over deaths of celebrities. I only think "Oh that sucks, another person from my childhood died. I am getting old."

First thing -- do NOT COUNT ME as a person living in an "orgy of shallow emotion."

For fcks sake. Just because I said I did cry?

I didn't say I was WAILING AT THE FUNERAL.

I would have liked to have been there, sure.

But you are painting everyone who admits they DID feel something as one very negative thing, and I don't effing appreciate that.
And it IS an insult to just sweep everyone under ONE BRUSH and decide that negative, shallow thing is exactly what they are.

When I was younger, I didn't feel much of anything for ANYONE. Even seeing my own mother weeping because my father was in hospital left me completely unmoved, and other family members hated me for that, they were shocked I couldn't connect with the genuine worry and sadness.

And yes, I'm sorry but people DO cry and get upset GENUINELY.

If you think it's always and can only ever be "shallow" and fake just to "join in" with NTs. then you have a hell of a lot to learn about life and people.

It was as I got older, life went on, and I went through some awful losses and tragedies in my own life, that I found a place awakening in me that was ore sensitized to loss and sadness, even when it wasn't my own anymore.

THAT can happen. It clearly has never and will never happen to Chichikov. I feel sorry for you. You're cold.

As for celebrity deaths, that too is not always some shallow act of trying to join in, for most of the people who may feel something for it.

It's not even about getting emotional about EVERY "celebrity death."

I too mostly go "Oh that sucks, someone from my childhood died, gee I'm getting old."

I too mostly go "oh too bad" and get on with my day.

It all depends on not only the individual person but whether or not they even took any interest in that public figure, combined with whether or not the death was premature/tragic or expected and peaceful.

There are several complex factors involved in if or how one person will react at all -- or not -- to stuff like this. There's nothing wrong with having no reaction, not giving a s**t, didn't know that person so why should I care, etc.

NOthing wrong with that at all.

Conversely, however, there is also nothing wrong with some people feeling a few more things.

It's true SOME people go over the top with it. SOME people have an obsessive reaction because they were unhealthily obsessive about that public figure. There are people who bring a degree of mental instability to many of these situations. There are "super fans" of everyone from pop singers to royal figures to even politicians.

Personally I find most of those people go too far but it's none of my business. Maybe it's their special interest.

There are also plenty of people who are not crazy, obsessive or anything unstable at all, they are normal people with their own full lives, but the feel the sadness of the event or situation because they can experience empathy for someone else, or even relate to some of the issues that person may have faced.

And it's not "NT" or non-autistic to be that way. Aren't we forever affirming on here that autistics run the gamut from Sheldon's to people who do have different reactions to things? There's not "NT or not" about some things. We are still the same SPECIES as NTs and can still have many of the same feelings in life. Jesus.

Also, down another level, just because someone even discusses a controversy surrounding a public figure or their death, doesn't mean they are one of these obsessives. But of course, I'm on a site full of black-and-white rigid thinkers. . . .

You know, there is something I'm really SICK of on this site.

And that is how a lot of people here honestly believe that ALL people on the autism spectrum are SHELDON.

Zero emotion, ALL logic, NO idea of nuances of human emotion, reaction, behavior.

And if we're bashing NTs, then lets do a bit more: I thought it was NTs who thought everyone autistic is Sheldon?

And I though it was WE who know that this is profoundly NOT the case, it's we who know we are all different variations?

That we even don't all have all the traits but that autism encompasses a wide range of individuals?

I am sick of the bashing that ability to have EMOTION gets around here.

There are spectrum people who genuinely feel things, and can feel empathy. Can feel genuinely touched by someone or something happening, even if it doesn't directly involve them.

I'm also sick of the all-or-nothing thinking that makes some people here fail to use their reading comprehension skills, and if they see someone saying the least thing, they then make that a BIG thing about that person and consign them to a scrapheap of their designation. Never considering that there are degrees of emotion, degrees of everything. Not "either or." Not you're either logical enough to feel nothing OR you are a complete emotional wreck.

Emotions from the mildest to the strongest are HUMAN. It's okay if YOU don't have them but don't pain everyone else who does with one giant and extreme brush, and call them fake to boot.

It's NOT all faking. I'm sick of the actual Sheldons on here being unable, just completely unable to comprehend that being more sensitive to things that are generally sad in nature is not just faking it to be like an NT.

For christssakes.

This accusation, along with the perennial "I question your diagnosis" BS are two of the things that make me hate this place despite the upsides about this community, which I need.

OOOkay, thanks for that, Bird in Flight. No, of course we are not all Sheldon (though I am quite similar to him in some ways (without the giant IQ)). Being rigid, having black and white opinions and low empathy are, however, all signs of Aspergers'. Once again, I am not insulting anyone, but we are what we are and there's no point in pretending that we are the same as NT's. Being an NT is not an insult, but to paraphrase Temple Grandin, if there was nothing but NT's, the world would be very social, very loud (due to all the talking) and nothing would ever get done. We (Aspies) can think in straight lines and don't get easily distracted by emoting at each other or the endless chattering at each other so many 'normal' people think is necessary. I'm glad I'm not 'normal'. It must be an exhausting emotional roller coaster ride.

Wow, having an hysterical breakdown on the Internet about someone you don't know who died 20 years ago. I feel sorry for you.