NOT GOOD, Connecticut shooter was diagnosed with Aspergers..

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deltafunction
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14 Dec 2012, 11:40 pm

This makes me so sad. Now people will think that anyone with AS is a danger to society. So much for my hopes of educating the public :( I'm never disclosing again...



Callista
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14 Dec 2012, 11:41 pm

Guys, please don't let the bigots of the world turn you bitter. NTs are not all the same. A few really will think of us as potentially homicidal, but most won't. Don't let it turn you into somebody who hides away. If they treat you badly because of who you are, that says nothing about your character--but everything about theirs. I know for a fact that many of us are unusually compassionate despite our inability to read and copy others' emotions; we dream of a better world and fiercely protect vulnerable individuals; we believe in fairness and honesty. Don't lose that. Don't get jaded; don't give up on those beliefs.

Sometimes the world will treat you badly. Sometimes they will accuse you of being a horrible, cold-blooded person. But they can't change who you are. You don't have to have people look up to you, or even notice you. But when you refuse to give in to hatred and bigotry, you re-affirm your own independence from the hateful world around you. They can hurt you--but you don't have to become like they are.

I don't think people with ASDs are unusually kind-hearted, but I do think we are more honest--mostly because lying is a talent that doesn't come naturally, for good or ill, when you're autistic. We openly exhibit that childlike, idealistic belief in fairness that NTs have learned to hide because it makes them vulnerable to ridicule; they know people will think of them as naive for it. Funny thing is, though, they still believe it deep down, and when they see somebody admitting to it, they feel better about their own hidden idealism.


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MikeW999
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14 Dec 2012, 11:42 pm

deltafunction wrote:
This makes me so sad. Now people will think that anyone with AS is a danger to society. So much for my hopes of educating the public :( I'm never disclosing again...


Same.



Callista
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14 Dec 2012, 11:44 pm

I'd rather take the risk. Think about all the people who can't help but be known as autistic, because it's so obvious that the casual observer can tell they're "a bit off"... you can't leave those people behind. We have to stand up for each other. Every time an NT gets to know an autistic person who is a decent individual, one who cares about others and would rather die than go on a shooting spree, they learn that autistics are real people rather than monsters.


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BuyerBeware
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14 Dec 2012, 11:45 pm

MikeW999 wrote:
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So much for any plans I had of leaving the house any time soon.

The kids are going to be really disappointed if they don't get to go to the grandparents' for Christmas because I can't find an NT to protect us on the trip.


Huh??


I tend to panic easily. To do things like shake and pace and tear up out of proportion to the situation. It can attract unwanted attention, like from high-strung strangers and law enforcement officers.

It's happened before. Generally I explain that I have AS, I tend to panic a little more easily, I just need to calm down, and everything's fine. It has gone the other way, though-- I have had nurses start proceedings to have me involuntarily committed or to have my kids put in foster care the very second they find out about the diagnosis.

It never gets anywhere-- I always have them call my husband; I don't know what he tells them but when they get off the phone I'm suddenly seen as a human being again. I suspect it involves words like "lawyer" and "discrimination suit."

After John Q. Public gets wind of this?? No way I'm driving 1100 miles in a beat-up van as the only adult with 4 kids and the dog. No way in Hell. Yeah, OK, there's a 95% chance nothing will happen.

On the other hand, there's a 5% chance that I'll yell at the kids, or curse, or use some unsavory figure of speech, or be involved in a fender-bender...

...and with this s**t on the wind, the minute the words "Asperger's syndrome" slip out of my mouth, it will take months and a team of lawyers to get me out of the psych ward, back off the Risperdal, and able to at least see my kids.

Not going out alone.


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noxnocturne
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14 Dec 2012, 11:49 pm

This is no excuse. This person knew right from wrong. He knew what he was doing when he went in there and shot the children and the adults. It was an act of pure evil, plain and simple.



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14 Dec 2012, 11:54 pm

not evil, just hurting and mentally unwell

http://forensicpsychologist.blogspot.co ... chool.html

Abstract

Previous research comparing rampage shooters in the U.S. and volunteer suicide bombers in the Middle East appears to be virtually non-existent. When these two types of suicidal killers have been mentioned in the same context, it has primarily been to dismiss any possible connections. Rampage shooters are generally assumed to be mentally unbalanced, while suicide bombers are seen as extreme, but rational, political actors. However, this review explores the possibility that the primary differences between the two types of killers are cultural, not individual, and that in terms of their underlying psychology and motivation, they are actually quite similar. In both cases, substantial evidence indicates that these perpetrators of murder–suicide share many of the following characteristics: (1) they had troubled childhoods, (2) they lived in oppressive social environments, (3) they suffered from low self-esteem, (4) they were triggered by a personal crisis, (5) they were seeking revenge, and (6) they were seeking fame and glory.



aspiemike
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14 Dec 2012, 11:55 pm

This whole thing makes me feel awful. Let's just sum it up with how I feel here.

One bad apple sure doesn't speak for everyone else. One bad apple does not define the tree it fell from either.

My emotions on this is pretty extreme right now and I am very upset to hear about this. The next thing we don't need is a "God Hates Aspies" movement or something as stupid as that.



1000Knives
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15 Dec 2012, 12:02 am

I'm pretty well f****d. I'm his age and live in CT, and in the one place I frequent a lot socially, I think my AS diagnosis is semi-common knowledge. f**k.



glider18
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15 Dec 2012, 12:02 am

I just visited a popular news blog about the shooting today. The news article on this particular site described the shooter as mentally disturbed, the son of divorced parents, and as having a rigid mother.

Ok...now for a summary of the blogs. People blogging were blaming and arguing against blaming:

*People not helping Adam because he was mentally disturbed
*That he was the child of divorced parents
*That his mother was rigid
*That he was young (the under 21 group)

In other words, just as we here on the WrongPlanet are concerned about Asperger's getting a bad rap because Adam may have been diagnosed with Asperger's (though this article I read didn't mention it), people on this blog were concerned over the above listed groups as being targeted as potential murderers.

Though the general public tends to be misinformed, statistics do speak. And from what I read from reputable sources---there is no evidence to support Asperger's causes people to become criminals more so than other groups---including NTs.


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InThisTogether
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15 Dec 2012, 12:08 am

noxnocturne wrote:
. This person knew right from wrong. He knew what he was doing when he went in there and shot the children and the adults. It was an act of pure evil, plain and simple.


Well, I don't know if we can say that. We have no idea what his mental state was when this happened. He is at the age for a psychotic break and has been repeatedly described as deeply disturbed. For all we know he was delusional and paranoid.

Unfortunately, it seems as though his mother is the only person who spent any time with him and she will not be able to tell us what was happening. Nor will he. So all those families will have to suffer forever with no answers. Not that any answer would help. But I think no answer can only make it worse.


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Surfman
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15 Dec 2012, 12:09 am

dp



Last edited by Surfman on 15 Dec 2012, 12:10 am, edited 2 times in total.

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15 Dec 2012, 12:09 am

Am I the only one who's not worried about this? I don't think it's going to be a big deal for us. Okay, I admit I keep my AS a secret anyway, but even if I told everyone about it, I don' t think people would treat me much differently. Maybe a few people would be afraid of me, but most know I'm harmless, and besides, maybe it wouldn't be such a bad thing to have people a little bit afraid of me.

I am a little shocked and saddened that autistic people are committing these horrible crimes, though.



MakaylaTheAspie
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15 Dec 2012, 12:09 am

Well, this makes the rest of us look nice, doesn't it?

First twenty kids have to die, now they're tagging the shooter with Asperger's. What next? The sun goes out for three days?


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InThisTogether
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15 Dec 2012, 12:15 am

1000Knives wrote:
I'm pretty well f****. I'm his age and live in CT, and in the one place I frequent a lot socially, I think my AS diagnosis is semi-common knowledge. f**k.


Wow. I'm sorry to hear that.

On the other hand, I have always said that my daughter makes a very good ambassador for autism. Yes, she has her quirks and issues, but I think most people find her delightful and I'd like to think their attitudes about autism are changed because they know her. Perhaps the same is true for you, too.


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15 Dec 2012, 12:16 am

InThisTogether wrote:
noxnocturne wrote:
. This person knew right from wrong. He knew what he was doing when he went in there and shot the children and the adults. It was an act of pure evil, plain and simple.


Well, I don't know if we can say that. We have no idea what his mental state was when this happened. He is at the age for a psychotic break and has been repeatedly described as deeply disturbed. For all we know he was delusional and paranoid.

Unfortunately, it seems as though his mother is the only person who spent any time with him and she will not be able to tell us what was happening. Nor will he. So all those families will have to suffer forever with no answers. Not that any answer would help. But I think no answer can only make it worse.


Point made-- and also the point that a lot of other demographics stand to be tarred and feathered by reactionaries because of this.

My heart absolutely breaks for those parents. My God. The one place you really expect your babies to be safe-- though I have to admit it never occurs to me to expect my kids to be safe at school; I send them off every day with a prayer that they'll make it home OK and I broke open the box of homeschooling books the second I heard about this one and this time I do not mean to be dissuaded.

And it's true. They'll never have answers. Their babies are gone and they'll never have answers. :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

It's got to be a bad night to be the parent of any child. A doubly bad night to be the parent of a spectrum child. My kids are 11, 5, 3, and 6 months and I already know I can forget about sleeping for a while.

I swear we have to be living in the end times. HAVE to be.

Suppose I should cancel the self-pity and fear and pour that energy into praying for 26 families tonight.


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