Witches to "hex" Kavannaugh, Rapists

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Let the Onion rot! There's no way satire can compete with reality, these days! Sweet fancy Moses!


https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/witch ... ar-BBOiAff

Threats to harm to a federal official are illegal.

I would love to see them arrested and put on trial. That would be some seriously entertaining s**t! Heh!

Well...in China they recently outlawed reincarnating. After you die its now against the law to come back as someone or as something else.

So I suppose the US could follow suit, and indict you for putting the whammy on someone!

But I imagine that it would be kind of hard to prove it in a court of law that Kavanaugh's sudden case of sciatica was caused by you sticking that pin into the back of that voodoo doll that you made in his image.

Yeah, a bit hard to prove! I'm excited for this trial! We're already the laughing stock of the world, so we might as well kick it up a notch!

"Your honor, my client's auto accident occurred just five minutes after the defendants were seen dancing around a fire in Central Park in New York City. We have eyewitnesses that they were all holding pictures of my client, and chanting things that I will prove were specifically composed to cause him ill harm!"

A "curse" could be considered using "an effigy that inspires people to do harm to the person".

The Secret Service had to investigate Kathy Griffin for her effigy.

It would first have to be determined to be a credible threat.

"I put a curse on you" has about as much credibility as "My thoughts and prayers are with you".

GACH!! What's bloody Trump doing to that poor old hag?!

SMIB!

What does SMIB stand for?

But the defense counters with "our ballistics experts tested it in the lab, and can show that the black magic that hit the victim while he was driving did NOT come from the defendant's witches coven, but from ...some OTHER unknown witches coven! A coven that used 45 caliber magic wands instead of the defendant's 38 caliber wand.

First, you need a lot of money for lawyers even if you're ultimately innocent.

Secondly, holding a meeting, where threats are made like, "physical harm will come to Judge K" is arguably illegal.

We don't know how the curse will be fulfilled, maybe someone in the coven decides to buy a gun, and fulfill the "curse", or maybe they hope one person out of these 700,000 people are nuts enough to make it happen.

(Sidenote: you see this in several Agatha Christie novels, someone uses a "curse" to hide a real a murder plot).

Well that would be hard to do,you’ll need something personal from each one.
Oh well, more power to them.