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Johnny Depp Vs Amber Heard verdict discussion

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Matrix Glitch
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07 Jun 2022, 8:05 am

I don't see why broadcasting it to hundreds of strangers is necessary in most cases.

And I don't think Amber Heard needed to either. She got a divorce and a $7 million dollar settlement, and she should have left it at that, like most people would.



Last edited by Matrix Glitch on 07 Jun 2022, 8:12 am, edited 1 time in total.

auntblabby
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07 Jun 2022, 8:12 am

if somebody screwed you over, you'd wanna broadcast it to the universe.



Pepe
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07 Jun 2022, 8:18 am

Matrix Glitch wrote:
I don't see why broadcasting it to hundreds of strangers is necessary in most cases.

And I don't think Amber Heard needed to either. She got a divorce and a $7 million dollar settlement, and she should have left it at that, like most people would.


In hindsight, she made a doozey of a mistake and damaged the #Metoo



Matrix Glitch
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07 Jun 2022, 8:20 am

auntblabby wrote:
if somebody screwed you over, you'd wanna broadcast it to the universe.


No if about it. I was screwed over by a user narcissist. But other than seeking revenge, and trying to make that person suffer, I don't have any reason to broadcast it to the universe.



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07 Jun 2022, 8:34 am

auntblabby wrote:
if somebody screwed you over, you'd wanna broadcast it to the universe.
Not I.  My preferred method is to wait, watch, and passive-aggressively make life more difficult for them at the first opportunity.



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07 Jun 2022, 8:38 am

auntblabby wrote:
Matrix Glitch wrote:
Why would someone need to speak about it on social media?
freedom of speech? freedom to seek redress of grievances?
The mere fact that someone has something to say does not mean they are required to say it; and the mere fact that something is said does not mean anyone else is required to listen to it.



Matrix Glitch
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07 Jun 2022, 8:43 am

Fnord wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
if somebody screwed you over, you'd wanna broadcast it to the universe.
Not I.  My preferred method is to wait, watch, and passive-aggressively make life more difficult for them at the first opportunity.


I just put an abrupt end to the relationship. Really that was probably more devastating to them than any other course of action.



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07 Jun 2022, 8:48 am

Matrix Glitch wrote:
Fnord wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
if somebody screwed you over, you'd wanna broadcast it to the universe.
Not I.  My preferred method is to wait, watch, and passive-aggressively make life more difficult for them at the first opportunity.
I just put an abrupt end to the relationship. Really that was probably more devastating to them than any other course of action.
"Ghosting" is also useful to me, but only when I do not expect to ever again see that person face-to-face.



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07 Jun 2022, 9:45 am

Matrix Glitch wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
if somebody screwed you over, you'd wanna broadcast it to the universe.


No if about it. I was screwed over by a user narcissist. But other than seeking revenge, and trying to make that person suffer, I don't have any reason to broadcast it to the universe.



I would if I wanted to clear my name if their lie had damaged my career because of the lie.

This wouldn't be live if he didn't have fame because her lie would not have had affect on him. People wouldn't have known whom she was talking about.


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07 Jun 2022, 4:22 pm

Matrix Glitch wrote:
To me there's a big difference between legal avenues such as restraining orders and filing charges, and generating public exposés.

Also this seems to be a celebrity only thing. I doubt a woman who works at Walmart could get the Washington Post to publish an op-ed about abuse she suffered from her husband who works at Home Depot.

How many Metoo headlines featured a run of the mill person who makes less than $50,000 a year?

No headlines but it does trickle down. When in the early ‘90s Clarence Thomas who was being considered
for a Supreme Court nomination was accused of sexual harassment it caused all sorts of uncomfortable conversations in the workplace and at home. Signs were posted on all the walls explaining what sexual harassment is. For example I and most men had no clue that women did not appreciate being complimented on their clothing by men they were not in a relationship with especially co workers. We were shocked. My co workers were not radical feminists by any means but they felt empowered by the moment. Then we let it slide necessitating the #MeToo movement. Many people who were not celebs posted on that hashtag.

I would hate to go backwards. You are 60 don’t you remember the casual sexism and misogyny in music lyrics and workplaces?


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07 Jun 2022, 4:49 pm

ASPartOfMe wrote:
. . . I and most men had no clue that women did not appreciate being complimented on their clothing by men they were not in a relationship with especially co workers.  We were shocked. . .
Clothing, hair, makeup . . . just saying "you look nice" to an unrelated co-worker should not be considered welcome.

One woman filed a complaint because I said "Good morning" when I walked past her receptionist's desk first thing every day.  The discussion with HR was humiliating and embarrassing.  So I would come in through the loading dock instead.  Then I got called back into HR because the receptionist claimed I was ignoring her.  Another humiliating and embarrassing discussion ensued.  My next discussion with HR involved their receipt of my two weeks' notice.



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07 Jun 2022, 8:29 pm

Matrix Glitch wrote:
DW_a_mom wrote:

It isn't BS to say this case will make it more difficult for women to come forward.

You are looking at it from the perspective of someone who watched the trial and formed an opinion.

Instead, look at it from the perspective of someone who has not watched the trial and does not have an opinion on the veracity of the claims made by either side. What do they see?

What they see is a woman not only being completely torn apart by society and the media, but with the vast majority of society seeming to enjoy the fact she was knocked down.

Why would anyone risk telling their own story in a climate like that? Why would they think they would be believed when she wasn't? Abusers tell their victims all the time that no one will ever believe them, and their sense of self has long been destroyed by the abuse. They won't see how or why their telling their story would come out any differently than what has happened here. They haven't parsed all the details like you have, they don't feel they "know" she was lying. What they see is how viciously she's been tarred.

Looking at it all strictly from future victims perspectives, I worry about the chilling effect allowing this to become such a spectacle will have.


Why do stories need to be told? What a person needs to do is file for a restraining order and file for a divorce. That's a proactive way of dealing with it. If someone is willing to tell their story to the public, then they shouldn't be afraid to take the less dangerous and more practical legal steps towards ending abuse. Amber Heard had all sorts of options such as having her injuries medically diagnosed as evidence towards filing criminal charges against Depp. Instead she went to the Washington Post to do an op-ed on him.


Filing a legal action requires telling someone your story. I'm not talking about to the public.

If you are afraid no one will believe you, you won't share enough with anyone important to file a legal action.

Have you, by the way, READ the op ed? The op ed wasn't designed to expose Johnny. It was written to expose the way the PUBLIC treated her after accusations became public.


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Matrix Glitch
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07 Jun 2022, 8:33 pm

ASPartOfMe wrote:
Matrix Glitch wrote:
To me there's a big difference between legal avenues such as restraining orders and filing charges, and generating public exposés.

Also this seems to be a celebrity only thing. I doubt a woman who works at Walmart could get the Washington Post to publish an op-ed about abuse she suffered from her husband who works at Home Depot.

How many Metoo headlines featured a run of the mill person who makes less than $50,000 a year?

No headlines but it does trickle down. When in the early ‘90s Clarence Thomas who was being considered
for a Supreme Court nomination was accused of sexual harassment it caused all sorts of uncomfortable conversations in the workplace and at home. Signs were posted on all the walls explaining what sexual harassment is. For example I and most men had no clue that women did not appreciate being complimented on their clothing by men they were not in a relationship with especially co workers. We were shocked. My co workers were not radical feminists by any means but they felt empowered by the moment. Then we let it slide necessitating the #MeToo movement. Many people who were not celebs posted on that hashtag.

I would hate to go backwards. You are 60 don’t you remember the casual sexism and misogyny in music lyrics and workplaces?


What I remember was around 1995 a woman at work was deeply upset. I don't remember the circumstances exactly. She was very worried about something involving her child I think. She was so scared she was shaking. And I was afraid to put my hand on her shoulder to comfort her, even though I could tell it's what she wanted/needed.



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07 Jun 2022, 8:44 pm

Fnord wrote:
ASPartOfMe wrote:
. . . I and most men had no clue that women did not appreciate being complimented on their clothing by men they were not in a relationship with especially co workers.  We were shocked. . .
Clothing, hair, makeup . . . just saying "you look nice" to an unrelated co-worker should not be considered welcome.

One woman filed a complaint because I said "Good morning" when I walked past her receptionist's desk first thing every day.  The discussion with HR was humiliating and embarrassing.  So I would come in through the loading dock instead.  Then I got called back into HR because the receptionist claimed I was ignoring her.  Another humiliating and embarrassing discussion ensued.  My next discussion with HR involved their receipt of my two weeks' notice.[/color]


Good morning, Sir. 8)



Last edited by Pepe on 07 Jun 2022, 10:57 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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07 Jun 2022, 8:45 pm

cyberdad wrote:
Fnord wrote:
I am surprised this discussion is still going on -- not amazed, given the type of thread this is, just surprised.


Not surprising, it has implications for #Metoo


That is the part that I've been hearing debated the most, the effect on victims, and their willingness to take actions to protect themselves in the future. Taking action requires someone actually believe them.

Its a horrible, messy case that shouldn't be creating precedence and affecting people's choices but, of course, it is.


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07 Jun 2022, 8:47 pm

Matrix Glitch wrote:
ASPartOfMe wrote:
Matrix Glitch wrote:
To me there's a big difference between legal avenues such as restraining orders and filing charges, and generating public exposés.

Also this seems to be a celebrity only thing. I doubt a woman who works at Walmart could get the Washington Post to publish an op-ed about abuse she suffered from her husband who works at Home Depot.

How many Metoo headlines featured a run of the mill person who makes less than $50,000 a year?

No headlines but it does trickle down. When in the early ‘90s Clarence Thomas who was being considered
for a Supreme Court nomination was accused of sexual harassment it caused all sorts of uncomfortable conversations in the workplace and at home. Signs were posted on all the walls explaining what sexual harassment is. For example I and most men had no clue that women did not appreciate being complimented on their clothing by men they were not in a relationship with especially co workers. We were shocked. My co workers were not radical feminists by any means but they felt empowered by the moment. Then we let it slide necessitating the #MeToo movement. Many people who were not celebs posted on that hashtag.

I would hate to go backwards. You are 60 don’t you remember the casual sexism and misogyny in music lyrics and workplaces?


What I remember was around 1995 a woman at work was deeply upset. I don't remember the circumstances exactly. She was very worried about something involving her child I think. She was so scared she was shaking. And I was afraid to put my hand on her shoulder to comfort her, even though I could tell it's what she wanted/needed.


Be afraid...
Be very afraid...
Run fast...
Run far...

But seriously, people just can't take the risk these days.
I remember when there was a high profile case of sexual harassment, here in Australia.
The end result was males refusing to go to lunch with female coworkers.

Welcome to the grave new world of political correctness on steroids. 8)