Interesting point, Lightning88, about "living a lie" while popular. I don't know if conformity is as rampant on high school campuses from my experience at two high schools, but there certainly is a standard you must live up to to be considered "popular".
Yesterday I was in a conversation about how people dress, where two people made very insightful remarks on popularity. Note that when I use "I" in these remarks, I am talking from their character:
Remark 1: There was one day in which I wore more conventionally "preppy" clothing to school, and more people talked to me. So that's why - although I HAVE the wardrobe, I don't wear it
Remark 2: I have a little sister who one day wore some clothes from Hollister, and she suddenly found herself being talked to by the conventionally "popular" students.
That sister of the person who made remark 2, though, was in middle school, which is an entirely different beast. But what I am trying to say is that there is, unfortunately, a standard for popularity in Charlotte.
When I was in Rhode Island, I remember that all different gropus of people were popular. Interesting.
It would be difficult to create a diagram showing how many friends I had in different grades but I might as well attempt. There are still many shades of grey...
Kindergarten: Don't remember
1st Grade: Four of five friends, moderately popular
2nd Grade: Kept most of my 1st grade friends, added some more, stayed moderately popular
3rd Grade: Transferred to a full-time Gifted Education class, kept inviting my 1st/2nd grade friends periodically to my house for this or that, but because we were seperated from each other in school, friendships dissolved into acquaintanceships.
One of my best friends at that time moved to Michigan. I started out making friends in the Gifted class, but when the Pokemon craze came to town, I began to realize how different I was from the rest of the school, obsessed with this piece of pop culture, and I probably had my first true feelings of isolation. Incidentially, at that time, my parents told me that I had been diagnosed with Aspergers' syndrome.
Eventually I bacame a conformist and started playing the Pokemon games and collecting the cards; with this common interest I was able to regain my friends and add some more by the end of the year.
4th grade: Conflicts between me and the teacher made me leave the full-time gifted program. In 4th grade, I made quite a few friends - probably having 10-15 by the end of the year - but had weird behaviors that gave me a few "enemies"
5th grade: behaviors escalated, but for some reason I kept a lot of my friends and probably "peaked" in popularity.
At the end of 5th grade I had to leave the past behind and move to Rhode Island.
6th Grade Attending a school for people with various learning/mental disorders, my odd interests and newcomer status in a state where everyone was born within minutes of where they currently lived left me with only one true friend my age for most of sixth grade.
7th grade Two new students come to the school, whom I immediately befriend. I figure I will be more accepted in my school if I get a Gamecube, so I ask for one for Christmas and the balance of power shifts.
At the end of 7th grade I am deemed fit for public school.
Starting in 8th grade the reasoning for my social position becomes more and more complex. I find it more interesting to look at WHY I have the social position I do, but it would be superfluous...
8th Grade I was in a self-contained special ed classroom for half of the day and the other kids in the class hated me because I repeatedly insulted their film taste and anime obsession. In the entire middle school, I had only one person I would consider a friend, and he was a more casual friend.
9th grade One serious friend, a moderate network of acquaintanceships, was referred to once as "secretly popular", but I think people called me weird behind my back.
10th grade My friend from 9th grade left, kept the network of acquaintances. I felt more and more isolated.
At the end of 10th grade I had to move to North Carolina.
11th grade At least five potential friendships, but there's got to be reciprocity...