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MonochromeMatryoshka
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04 Jan 2015, 4:19 am

All of the girls my age (and younger) tease me because I don't go out shifting lads at discos or go on dates. I'm 14. I have all the rest of my life ahead of me, why waste my teenage years on dating?

What's your opinion?



Scissor...me
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04 Jan 2015, 8:48 am

Hi. I'm 13. And I never dated any one either... ish. I think for most of the teens that date, it's not real love. Because those people who "love" someone then rudely dumps them the next day and then goes out with some other guy in the class... But there's nothing wrong with that, some people are just hopeless romantics and it's fine... But there is nothing wrong with not dating anyone either because love just comes. You can't control it you just feel it. So maybe you haven't been in the right places yet. (I haven't cuz 100% guys in my class are dumb) your friends should stop teasing you about this and live with it. Good luck


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Anna_K
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04 Jan 2015, 11:02 am

I am 15 years old and I have never dated anyone. And most of my friends haven't either. I don't feel pressure to date from them but I have a friend I've known since elementary school who has dated lots. I don't know how she does it. What does she have that guys like so much?

But you shouldn't worry, most 13-14 year old boys are pretty immature in my experiences, even some 15 year olds are too.


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Kiprobalhato
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09 Jan 2015, 1:41 am

14 year olds at discos?

i don't want to bat an eye when i see younger teens dating (15 and below). i may feel a tiny bit of envy when they appear outwardly happy since i never exactly had that kind of bond with someone else. (i was in an obsessive limerence at that time though, at the beginning phases i was satisfied with the give and take i received from LO but)

the liberty that comes with being single is pretty exhilarating though. limerence first called my name my very first day of high school and is STILL lingering in my mind, albeit nothing but vestiges, that part of my mind, mossy and covered in cobwebs for not being stimulated for so long. but it's there.

perhaps love will sneak up on me again od yom.

let them do what they want. it may definitely not be to the standard and maturity level in adult marriage (sighs) but they learn something, gain valuable experience and you can't really go wrong with at least THAT, i think. making stupid mistakes ecouraged by being blinded by love, lovestruck can happen, and at that critical age it can mess you up.

someone on here said i act like i'm 35. that as one of the best compliments i've ever gotten.


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Zajie
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09 Jan 2015, 2:28 am

I'm 16 and I never even tried to get into a relationship because I think it won't do any good since it won't even last during this age.



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09 Jan 2015, 3:30 am

Young people should not be allowed to date, PERIOD. Dating is nothing more than a preresiquite for choosing a mate. The only thing that comes from dating is both parties get their hands down each other's pants, and the next thing you know, there's a shotgun wedding, because someone didn't have enough self-control to keep their member in their pants.



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09 Jan 2015, 4:32 pm

I have two teenage daughters. I would not have allowed either of them to date before age 16, as that seems way too young. Fortunately, the situation never came up.

They are now both a bit older (one is 19 and one is 17). And, still, neither has been on a date. The occasional times they go out, it is with a group of kids.

Please note, I have no idea what is considered "normal", by today's social standards. I generally am clueless in that respect.



MonochromeMatryoshka
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11 Jan 2015, 7:45 am

Kiprobalhato wrote:
14 year olds at discos?



I live in Ireland. Discos are available to pretty much anyone in secondary school (so 12-maybe 18) though a lot of schools in my town stop them after the Junior Cert (so around 16-ish). The discos are literally just music, "dancing" (you can't really call it that) and of course really desperate young teenagers looking for someone to shift. I know in my town (it has two schools which are basically ghetto central, 1 that's ok-ish and 2 that are amazing) at the major discos run by the two schools that have a bad rep, primary school students snuck in. I'm talking kids who are 10-12.

FYI: for those of you outside of Ireland, "shifting" is making out quite sloppily. It's pretty nasty tbh. Some kids record or take pictures of it to prove to their little "squads" that they "got de shift frum yerman"

I'm honestly disgusted by the fact that my friend (I've known her for 9 years!) is "dating" a lad who is about 15. She's 13! He sends her romantic messages and they watch movies together... They also go on dates and their parents are for some reason ok with that. This behaviour is acceptable to many parents?!



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13 Jan 2015, 5:08 pm

If you want to be sure you’re not too young to date, wait till you are too old :P

The view that teenagers shouldn’t be allowed to date has always haunted me, even when there’s noöne in sight defending it. I wish I could see them and those who hold the opposite view discussing the matter with each other, for a change. Whenever I hear or read one side, it always seems as though the other doesn’t exist and I’ve just imagined it.


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blast335
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19 Jan 2015, 1:51 pm

Hi I'm 14 and have never really dated, I am against kids dating before high school, because I don't think they know the difference between love and infatuation. If you don't think your ready then don't rush yourself, if people tease you for it just ignore them, because if YOU don't think your ready then you really aren't.


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Lazershow
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19 Jan 2015, 2:15 pm

I'm 17 and never really dated all that much. I find it a waste of time honestly. Id much rather spend my time worrying about my future for now. There is still plenty of time for relationships down the road.



lickerofjustice
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31 Jan 2015, 12:27 pm

Yeah, so I dated for 2 times this far and my conclusion about teens dating is:
-It's their life sweetener. Life is sometimes boring without love. You know, I add sugar to my oatmeal to make it taste better.
-I found it a waste of time too, but I experienced few ups and downs dating so... yeah...
-Dating in teenager years is not a good idea here. Why transform your best friend into your worst enemy? (I mean, after breaking up.)
-I know that feel when some teenagers wants to experience something fun to live the life to the fullest but... why dating? Not doing something better with more pumping adrenaline or somethin'?

Btw, Better not care about your friends teasing you. I don't think 14 is a good age here...

from: Someone who rather not date anymore HAHA :wink:


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17 Feb 2015, 8:18 am

Even me and the other older teens here can agree dating isn't all that.

But I also have to say that, in my opinion, dating as a teenager isn't always a bad thing.

Yes, most teen relationships DO NOT and WILL NOT last.

Most of them aren't very strong relationships.

Most of them aren't mature relationships.

Most teens in relationships aren't truly ready for it.

But, you know what?

Dating as a teenager can teach you about love and dating.

In my opinion dating in high school can be a sort of gateway to learning what it's like to have a boyfriend or girlfriend.

You actually learn how to be committed, dedicated and selfless with yourself and your time.

The relationship might not last forever and might be 'pointless', but you still would learn a little about love and dating.

Even if it's just the tiniest things, it's still a start.

There are people in their 20's who have never had a girlfriend or boyfriend.

Many of them might find love and dating really hard - they might not know how to talk to the person they are attracted to, they might not know the right things to do or say.

High school dating is early-preparation for this kind of stuff.

But at the same time under 16 is a very young age, and there is nothing wrong anyway if you have never been on a date and are 18, maybe even 25 years old.

My point is, there's nothing wrong if you have never been on a date when you are 16-25, but there's nothing good about it either....

But 14 is ridiculous. Don't worry about your friends.



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17 Feb 2015, 7:05 pm

When I was 14, I "shifted" with someone (we called it "making out"). I found it disgusting, frankly.

When I got a little older, I learned to how to kiss more gently. Thus, "making out" became more pleasurable.

Ignore the people who tease you. Only date when you feel ready. Otherwise, you might get into a bad situation.



Outrider
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18 Feb 2015, 8:05 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
When I was 14, I "shifted" with someone (we called it "making out"). I found it disgusting, frankly.

When I got a little older, I learned to how to kiss more gently. Thus, "making out" became more pleasurable.

Ignore the people who tease you. Only date when you feel ready. Otherwise, you might get into a bad situation.


I never understood why anyone likes 'making out' so much anyway. It's more of an aquired taste for us aspies, I think.

I'd prefer a soft, romantic and gentle kiss with a female I love than just sloppy making out.



Kiprobalhato
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21 Feb 2015, 2:31 pm

too many good points from Outrider's post to quote. +1 to all of them. young teen dating, when you start out is messy and i think, nothing like a older, mature relationship but that doesn't mean it's (always) a waste of time. i mean, i learned a whooooooooole crapton during my limerent years in HS, what signals to perceive, etc...thing is, she was "a bit" crazy and unpredictable, and that whole thing left me with a mover's truck full of baggage. not the best example but that doesn't mean i regret it. she was not a soulmate as i had thought (oh deluded me) a lesson with dead green hair.

wuohh!

no doubt you can get badly hurt as a teenager, though. just because you have the rest of your life ahead of you doesn't mean you should be careless under the guise of experimenting or testing the waters. though guess i sould lake captain obvious here. :rambo:

Outrider wrote:
I never understood why anyone likes 'making out' so much anyway. It's more of an aquired taste for us aspies, I think.

I'd prefer a soft, romantic and gentle kiss with a female I love than just sloppy making out.


my first (and only, really) lip kiss was with a buzzed person i didn't know. i got kidded on the cheek once when i was 14, again by someone i don't know. much preferred the latter.


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