Why I hate facebook

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So I finally caved in and got a facebook again after 5 years of avoiding it like the plague. I just moved to the UK from the US, and have lost touch with a lot of my old friends and family. I always made an effort to email people and send them pictures of my life, but no one ever responded- something that was especially hard with my family members. So many of these people would say to me "oh you should get a facebook, we can keep in touch then!" and "oh having a facebook would make it so easy to see what's going on in your life, we really want to know what you're up to now that you're in England and starting a family". Okay, sounds reasonable, so I caved in and did it.

A week and a half later and I remember why I got rid of the damn thing five years ago. Everything about that site is so impersonal and superficial. Everyone seems to be aware that all their friends and friend's friends can see everything they post, and so every picture, message, wall post, etc always seems incredibly superficial like they're simply posting to upshoot their friends or show everyone how important their life is. I joined to keep in touch with my family and reconnect with my friends, but no one seems interested in actually having a real conversation or relationship on there, or actually taking the time to look at the pictures I post. I found my old baby sitter who lived with us for 5 years when I was younger who was like a big sister to me, friended her and she messaged me asking how my life was. I told her I just got married and am pregnant, and all she had to say was "that's nice, so what else are you up to?"- two messages later of her one-worded responses and our conversation was over. And after friending everyone in my family, the only responses I get from them are stupid wall posts that go something like "welcome to FB". No how are you, how's the baby, how's life in England...just welcome to FB. Thanks. I wondered why the people who never bothered to email me after I emailed them were asking me to make a facebook account, now I know it's so they can pretend to have a relationship with me and pretend to be involved in my life, without the burden of actually taking the time to make an effort to actually check up on me. I hate it- is this really how people think they can carry on relationships? This whole business has really made me feel like an outsider, I've never felt so isolated and confused by people as I do now.

Sorry for the rant, but god do I hate facebook.

Facebook is good for private messages... thats about it...

Chat used to be good... but whatever they have done to it just sucks...

That's the same reason I got rid of it. It breeds superficiality. After a while, using a site like that will destroy any desire to be hospitable and human. It turns people into anti-social personalities after a while.

I don`t like FB all that much either! No one talks! I only have it to keep the friendships I have with my WP friends!

I accepted an invite when Facebook was new. I hung on for just over a year then I left. The Wall Post format started to aggravate me after a while. It would be like communicating with Post It notes on a fridge.

Two main problems were this and the fact that it brings together social circles like Work, Friends, and Family that don't always mix well. So it become completely banal or someone's mom gets mad when some younger cousin swears while talking to their friends.

I do much prefer Forums for discussion, but I'm not sure if this could ever be implemented as a social media network. For example as an experiment what would happen if some web savvy person made a forum just for their extended family? I wonder if everyone would catchup with each other with really on going discussion or just continue to post Status Updates?

Seiously thinking about deleting mine...

This is one of the main reasons why I greatly dislike Facebook and social networking in general too. If there's anybody I need to stay in contact with, I'll have their number and e-mail and other private forms of contact. And personally, I'd rather be talking in person or on the phone to somebody I really care about than through something as superficial as Facebook. I think people just like the idea of feeling important and powerful by having so many people they can just stay in contact with, even if they don't really care.

I've heard more negative things about Facebook than positive, so I've never created an account. It just don't hold any appeal to me. If any friends or family want to keep in contact with me, they have my e-mail address, my phone number and they know where I live. If they don't have those things, then it's for one of two reasons:

1) I decided I'd rather not speak to them anymore (this is a very rare occurrence--it's only happened a few times in my life, and each time, it was a very hard decision)

2) they decided they'd rather not speak to me anymore (this has happened more times than I care to admit)

Either way, I don't really want to "connect" with people who belong in either group. That, and I go online to escape banal pleasantries and small talk, not get more of it.

I'm thinking of completely ditching Facebook at some point in the near future (or restricting it to a handheld device other than my laptop), because it's been doing more harm than good lately.

I use it to keep in touch with university friends and to provide academic help for those who ask, but even though I have nearly 400 friends on there, I can't see the point of keeping most of them on there because there are probably only about 25 people max. who I actually regularly talk to regularly at university and home combined.

Reasons why I'm thinking of removing it:
- Looking at others' photos and friendly conversations only makes me more self-conscious about my own social life
- It's a dangerous tool for procrastination, especially for university students like myself
- I don't keep in contact with most of my 'friends'
- I've been spending far too long looking on Facebook, with hardly any practical gain
- It's easy to misinterpret someone's feelings over Facebook messages, which are 100% text (as opposed to 7% in real life)
- It's not helping my problems with self-discipline

I'm torn though - as I want to make some new friends at university (as I move into halls again next year) and I have a feeling that removing Facebook will put me at an immediate social disadvantage.

I don't particularly hate Facebook, but I only spend like... 10 seconds on it before logging out..

I need help, I spend less time, waaayy less than my classmates, yet they get better grades than I do!

Facebook is good for keeping up with people's lives without having to get involved. Post a picture maybe once a month or comment about a local issue (regional issues not so much).

The chatting is usually no better than phone TXTing, so, yea, pretty worthless.

It has been useful at times for organizing stuff like knowing when someone B-Day party is.

Otherwise feel free to ignore the daily aphorisms. 99% of us do. If you don't get involved with catty HS drama then it basically won't happen, either.

Try Google+. It's less about popularity and more about content. There's no obligation to be "friends" with anybody. Label your circles "Douchebags", "Jackwagons", and "People I don't deeply hate" for as much as it matters. Nobody knows what you label your circles but you and you can organize and have greater control over the content you see.