i miss being depressed

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i have had deprression for years and have been on meds for it and have been happy. but now being happy is just boring so i miss being depressed and i find my self inadvertanly trying to become depressed. asents being happy is boring i become null with no feeling so at lested being depressed is felling and deffently not boring.

come to think of it this song fits perfictly
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ud4HuAzHEUc[/youtube]

Maybe find something that makes you feel, but on the positive end of the scale...?
Something that brings a heightened, great feeling,
not just happy in a mundane, numb sense.

I gues you are not really happy then if you would rather be depressed. You do not really have to go back to that if you can still make progress on the positive side.

Some of the things you said make me think you still have some form of depression going on.

I thought immediately of the tale of Mr Worry that I used to read my daughter. The synopsis is he worries a lot, but then meets a Wizard. the wizards tells him to write down all his worries and the wizard would make sure everything he worried about would not happen, which the wizard does. He's happy for a fair few days but then is worried that he will never have anything to worry about again.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fLes1MufRf8[/youtube]

Hey Grunt 200,

Quite often the antidepression medication takes away most emotional feelings and flattens them out, both the good and the bad.
Is what your feeling emotional emptiness where once you had passion even if it was depressive?
I am not recommending going off or staying on the meds, thats for you to decide.
For some people the depression is so disabling that medication is necessary for the time it takes to develop some more adaptive coping or thinking styles to deal with life. They can then test out their skills for real when they slowly wean off the meds.
Other people need to stay on meds due to the biochemical imbalance in their brains which cannot be overcome by learning new skills.
Others still try to overcome depression without meds to assist.
Remember different medications will have a different effect on you - some wont work, some make things worse, others make it better but not without side effects.
If you are not entirely happy with the current medication and its causing you problems then maybe a different medication will work better for you.

These are the considerations you should raise with your prescribing doctor so you can make an informed choice.
Its also a good idea to get a second opinion.

Good luck
walk towards the light not the darkness.

thanks im achaly im the middle of changing the meds because the old one also started to make me eritable and agrresive so ill gust have to wait it out to see the changes

Unfortunately it's a process of trial and error and it takes time. Hang I
In there if you do it properly the results will be good in the end