i want to kill myself tonight

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Those medicines won't kill you. It seems to me you don't really want to kill yourself you just want to feel better. If you really wanted to die you'd use a more lethal multiple method way to do it.

I've had similar problems at work and I used to book hotel rooms, spend all my cash and binge drink lol

You ought to reduce your hours. You cannot remain motivated if your working over hard for so long. You will burn out. Your human, not a machine and not everyone can handle as much as others but that's okay. You must take care of yourself before you can give your best work.

You don't think 19 hydrocodone/acetaminophen pills would work? If it didn't I'm pretty sure my liver would be messed up pretty badly, and I'd still die. That's 95 mg of hydrocodone (90 is the reported minimum fatal dosage) and 9500 mg of acetaminophen. I'm not sure what the fatal dose of acetaminophen is but I know you're not supposed to take more than 4000 mg a day, and 7000 is considered acute overdose. Both of those together, I'm pretty certain it would do the trick.

And I just had the supervisor give me a "warning" today, for being late again. One more strike and he says he will go to the boss. Not as late today, but still like fifteen minutes late. I was up on time too.

I don't know why he doesn't just fire me. It would make it easier for me to just leave without anyone knowing.

Your an idiot if you think a human dies that easily. Yes you will hurt your liver but it is pretty powerful and instinctively you will spew up.

You want to die then use sleeping pills, crushed paracetamol with anti sickness pills 20 mins before pouring alcohol or a flammable liquid on yourself and self immolation and fall off a tall building together preferably with spikes at the bottom that you land on.

Without telling anyone so they can't stop you. Plan it right. Or you can make a noose along with the others, put it on your neck and when you set yourself alite you instinctively will go forward.

It makes me angry when people don't understand simple s**t and I have to spell it out. I'm so angry right now!

If you want to die over that are your too close minded to find a solution then that's not my problem but I'm pissed at the amount of people who use suicide as first 'solution'. They wont try and fix things! What are you really after? Sympathy?

I'm going to tell you something that no one else has yet:

Grow the f**k up.

No one likes getting up early and going to work. You are 20 freaking years old. You haven't even started your life yet. Don't like your job? Get a different one. Or go to school. Not having money is not an excuse to not go to school - we have financial aid for a reason.

Not try to be mean man but seriously suck it up and stop feeling sorry for yourself.

I'm aware of the risks. If I had a gun I'd be using that, but as it turns out those aren't very easy to get. And I have what I need to hang myself if nothing else works. I may not be thinking of the most effective method, but I still know what I'm doing.


Wow. Outstanding advice. Because me wanting to kill myself has nothing to do with the fact that I've been really depressed for two years, failed out of college after two semesters, have no friends, and apparently can't even support myself because I suck at every job I do.

Get a different job? This IS the different job. I already almost got fired at my last job, along with every other job I've had in the past. I don't want to live my life going from job to job. And me not going to school has nothing to do with money.

I'm sick of people telling me things will get better. It always just gets worse.

Dear L. Holmes,

one of my last thoughts in the evening and one of my first thoughts in the morning was about you.
Good to know that you feel not worse or maybe even slightly better.

You cant expect to feel really better in a short time. You have a severe depression. It takes time and help (and at least time quite a lot) to get really out of it.

What do you think about the poem from syzygyish?

Evam

To "doibelonghere"
You DID try to be mean. And you succeeded. This last sentence just gives some borderline quality to it.

To starfox: You were mean, too. I know that you ABSOLUTELY want him to try and fix things, but dont you think that your "kick-in-the-ass" philosophy might be way too tough for someone like Holmes. (Just check which of your mails he has answered.) If you dont manage with this strange NT sympathy, how about compassion?

To Holmes: Starfox has some experience with depression and suicide, and "doibelonghere" not, and also not the empathy that makes him try to get what it is.
Aspergers are often searching for the big effects and neglecting the small ones. But you can never get a big effect without those many small ones being at work.

Evam

we are all worried!
you know, for every person on Wrong Planet that posts, there are a thousand who don't!

so three posters posted
and that means there are three thousand people
who care about you,
want you to find happiness and peace

are as confused and lonely and desperate as you but are so stricken they can't even post here!

L_Holmes, I want you to think about this_

When are you happiest? :

When you are thinking about how miserable you are,
or,
when you are thinking about caring for some one you love?

What a bunch of Bastards that have quoted in this thread!

let me tell you self important little s**ts something!

you don't get on Wrong Planet and abuse a member who is asking for help!

Your life experience and your opinion doesn't mean s**t!
WP is the one last place in the world where an an Aspy can go to find, if not help, then succour and support!
You have betrayed this basic unwritten understanding!

Yes, people it is against the rules for this subforum to post ANYTHING but supportive messages.

Any further attack on OP will be removed.

L Holmes, I'm really sorry you feel so bad, and i understand it can be very tough in this world. Hope you find the strength to carry on.

*hugs*

Mr Holmes:

How are you doing today?

I'm wondering if he saw the clock-in-a-pail idea I posted. The clock is $30, but life is priceless. I'm also worried that if he loses this job, he may find himself "blacklisted". In small towns, the business elite tend to know each other. They could put out the word, so to speak, not to hire Holmes because he's "lazy" or whatever excuse they can come up with. As I noted, depression seems to run in his family. I'm reluctant to tell anybody to take antidepressants because they can have horrible side effects, but Holmes sounds like he really needs them. I hope he can find help and find a reason to live.

Another thing I tried when I first moved out on my own and no longer had my mom waking me up in the morning ( ) was to hook a small lamp up to a timer, and put the lamp next to my bed. When the lamp went off, I knew it was time to get up.

Well I'm glad you didn't go through with it. It could be much worse. Having Aspergers is definitely no reason to kill yourself.

I'm trying to help, not to abuse :-/

This angers me because it sounds like suicide advice. Maybe some people, including me make these posts because they ARE suicidal but not sure if they want to go through with it. Maybe they want support, maybe be reassured that there are people who give a damn about them, not looking for pity. If I wanted attention and pity I'd wave my scarred wrists in peoples faces instead of trying to hide them and write a fake suicide note on Facebook!