I think I was misdiagnosed

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_cora_
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28 Feb 2022, 9:56 am

So I have been like sorta faking my autism, now that I've gotten lonely I don't really want to fake it that much anymore. But I already have the diagnosis. Was it right? Idk.
It's so lonely and I'm not really getting benefit from acting more autistic. I need to make more friends but they all think I'm clingy and annoying. I know they're all hinting that they don't want to talk to me anymore. They never reply to my messages or take forever to reply. All of my past friends do that.
Idk what I did wrong. I'm constantly doubting my diagnosis. I know that if I wasn't in public mode and acted like my real self then I wouldn't be diagnosed. I also scored average on almost all of the tests, so there's really no concrete evidence that I'm autistic.
My therapist is trying to "teach me social skills" but it's just boring and I already know it all. I don't think people realize that the only reason I don't have friends is because I live in a super isolated area and never get to leave the house.



kraftiekortie
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02 Mar 2022, 5:07 pm

Sorry you're having a rough time.

I bet you're getting good grades in school.



LordMikey
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02 Mar 2022, 7:09 pm

It's better not to worry about what your diagnosis is. Getting attached to a diagnostic label might make your therapy less effective.

The BEST way to make friends that I know of is to join a group or club. Your profile summary says you're 14 years old: I suggest you try talking to your guidance counselor at school about it. Your therapist can make an appointment for you, and could probably come with you to the appointment, if you wanted.

I hope that helps!

~Lord Mikey~



_cora_
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02 Mar 2022, 7:35 pm

LordMikey wrote:
It's better not to worry about what your diagnosis is. Getting attached to a diagnostic label might make your therapy less effective.

The BEST way to make friends that I know of is to join a group or club. Your profile summary says you're 14 years old: I suggest you try talking to your guidance counselor at school about it. Your therapist can make an appointment for you, and could probably come with you to the appointment, if you wanted.

I hope that helps!

~Lord Mikey~

Thank you. I have already attempted to join different clubs, when I was still in school, but none of them really liked me and all my past friends found me and were being mean to me.
I'm now getting homeschooled, but we live in the middle of nowhere and that means no socialization opportunities. I've tried basically everything, but we're literally in the middle of nowhere, and there's nothing like that near me that isn't secret. And my parents think I'm weird and don't want me to talk to other kids.
If I was at school, I wouldn't be making this post, because I would have resources available for me. I'm forced to do homeschool due to my mental health (long story) so I'm stuck in my house 24/7. And I'm so sick due to the weather that I don't even feel like talking.



LordMikey
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02 Mar 2022, 8:15 pm

Homeschool in the middle of nowhere, huh? In THAT case: You need a pet dog. *Plugs her own ears to block out any protests*

Also, keep being social online.

Take the dog with you everywhere you go for at least 3 months and let it sleep in your bedroom. Treat it like a child. Never make it sleep outside. Hug it a lot. Let it eat some human food (but only what's safe for dogs).

I used to be scared of dogs and I used to think that people who treat their dog like a child are weird, but now I'm one of those weirdos! The dog will make you feel a LOT less lonely.

~ Lord Mikey ~



kraftiekortie
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03 Mar 2022, 5:58 am

Being in an isolated area, and being homeschooled, makes things really difficult as far as socialization is concerned.

No ——, Sherlock, I know

I’m just commiserating with you by stating the obvious.

How do you feel about the 4H Club? Or something like Junior Achievement?



_cora_
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03 Mar 2022, 10:15 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
Being in an isolated area, and being homeschooled, makes things really difficult as far as socialization is concerned.

No ——, Sherlock, I know

I’m just commiserating with you by stating the obvious.

How do you feel about the 4H Club? Or something like Junior Achievement?

What is 4H and Junior Achievement?



kraftiekortie
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03 Mar 2022, 4:59 pm

The 4H club is for children and adolescents. Chapters of the 4H club are usually in rural areas. There is an emphasis on learning rural self-reliance. Farming, taking care of farm animals, learning life skills in general. Google them for more information.

Junior Achievement is where children and adolescents are encouraged to start their own business. People are taught how to sell products, and how to run a business in a practical sense. Google them for more information.

The 4H Club is usually in rural locales. Junior Achievement has more varied locales.

I have trouble downloading links on WP---that's the only reason why I don't post the links for these organizations.



Last edited by kraftiekortie on 03 Mar 2022, 5:24 pm, edited 1 time in total.

The_Znof
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03 Mar 2022, 5:09 pm

LordMikey wrote:

I used to be scared of dogs and I used to think that people who treat their dog like a child are weird, but now I'm one of those weirdos! The dog will make you feel a LOT less lonely.

~ Lord Mikey ~


they eat puke and s**t, lol read the bible - they are all going to hell for it :twisted:

edit - haha missed that, welcome from your twin City.

ps - op its ok, we are all fake, I tried to game the adhd diagnosis to make sure... :jester:

my family says its drug seeking, I think it was more about revenge.. :evil:



lvpin
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04 Mar 2022, 10:09 am

Hey Cora, I think that is actually quite common. My sis and I both worried we were faking but there is a bunch of stuff they look for in the assessment past what you say. I remember reading my letter of my assessment and saw they were even watching how I fiddled with things and small stuff like the amount of facial expressions I used and how I walked. It would be fairly hard to trick them. Also, once you find out you have autism your behavior can change or you notice more things. After awhile I accepted that I wasn't faking but it was at about your age I panicked about it.



LordMikey
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07 Mar 2022, 1:54 am

The_Znof wrote:
LordMikey wrote:

I used to be scared of dogs and I used to think that people who treat their dog like a child are weird, but now I'm one of those weirdos! The dog will make you feel a LOT less lonely.

~ Lord Mikey ~


they eat puke and s**t, lol read the bible - they are all going to hell for it :twisted:



lol you read the Bible. The rules including not having a "familiar" currently don't apply to anyone but Muslims, and they are really only bound by those laws if they are living in the land that God took from the Israelites and gave to Muslims... Wasn't that well over 2000 years ago?

Oops I fed the troll.... *Leaves the thread with no intent to return*



42110117
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07 Mar 2022, 7:18 am

Have you ever been tested for BPD? Some things you have desribed in other posts seem to align with that. Perhaps you should try this:
https://www.psycom.net/borderline-perso ... ork%20City.



_cora_
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07 Mar 2022, 5:03 pm

42110117 wrote:
Have you ever been tested for BPD? Some things you have desribed in other posts seem to align with that. Perhaps you should try this:
https://www.psycom.net/borderline-perso ... ork%20City.

Even if I did have borderline, mentioning it would make me seem like even more of a faker. Plus, I'm a 14 year old girl, they will diagnose me with "annoying little girl that wants attention and is only a normal teen". I've looked at that before, it somewhat sounds like me and feels more accurate than autism, but I have already pursued this diagnosis and now everything I ever do is "just the autism".



lvpin
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07 Mar 2022, 5:22 pm

_cora_ wrote:
42110117 wrote:
Have you ever been tested for BPD? Some things you have desribed in other posts seem to align with that. Perhaps you should try this:
https://www.psycom.net/borderline-perso ... ork%20City.

Even if I did have borderline, mentioning it would make me seem like even more of a faker. Plus, I'm a 14 year old girl, they will diagnose me with "annoying little girl that wants attention and is only a normal teen". I've looked at that before, it somewhat sounds like me and feels more accurate than autism, but I have already pursued this diagnosis and now everything I ever do is "just the autism".


You are definitely very critical of yourself. Also BPD is Comorbid with ASD meaning if someone gets diagnosed with it, they likely have ASD. I’m fact in females diagnosed with BPD, it’s common that it is just misunderstood ASD. I think you should remind yourself that people have created these terms and they aren’t these perfectly defined labels and the research constantly changes. No two Aspies are alike. When I was ur age I constantly had ppl (including my therapists!) telling me I wasn’t autistic and it made me panic. I felt like I was faking everything I experienced and felt so guilty for faking. However as I grew I realised I just didn’t fit the stereotype and without knowing it, I fit a bunch of aspie traits I hadn’t known. Also with more knowledge i learnt no one can tell u are except the doctors bc plenty of “normal” seeming ppl are on the spectrum.



_cora_
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07 Mar 2022, 5:39 pm

lvpin wrote:
_cora_ wrote:
42110117 wrote:
Have you ever been tested for BPD? Some things you have desribed in other posts seem to align with that. Perhaps you should try this:
https://www.psycom.net/borderline-perso ... ork%20City.

Even if I did have borderline, mentioning it would make me seem like even more of a faker. Plus, I'm a 14 year old girl, they will diagnose me with "annoying little girl that wants attention and is only a normal teen". I've looked at that before, it somewhat sounds like me and feels more accurate than autism, but I have already pursued this diagnosis and now everything I ever do is "just the autism".


You are definitely very critical of yourself. Also BPD is Comorbid with ASD meaning if someone gets diagnosed with it, they likely have ASD. I’m fact in females diagnosed with BPD, it’s common that it is just misunderstood ASD. I think you should remind yourself that people have created these terms and they aren’t these perfectly defined labels and the research constantly changes. No two Aspies are alike. When I was ur age I constantly had ppl (including my therapists!) telling me I wasn’t autistic and it made me panic. I felt like I was faking everything I experienced and felt so guilty for faking. However as I grew I realised I just didn’t fit the stereotype and without knowing it, I fit a bunch of aspie traits I hadn’t known. Also with more knowledge i learnt no one can tell u are except the doctors bc plenty of “normal” seeming ppl are on the spectrum.

Tbh I'm just so sick of all these labels. School is telling me that I'm not autistic enough for services, I can't even do my schoolwork at this point, and thinking about actually going into school is just blocked off in my brain. Sorry for venting here. I just feel super overwhelmed and am sick of being angry at everyone and clinging to labels to try to feel like I belong. I'm lonely and the autism label has become my only friend.



lvpin
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07 Mar 2022, 5:51 pm

Oh don’t apologise! Ur feelings are fine. It definitely sounds like u r overwhelmed and that’s fine, nothing to be ashamed of. I’m sorry school can’t help, I went through that with my first secondary school before transferring. If u ever want to message me about anything with questions that’s ok too. Idk if u would find that helpful tho. It’s fine either way :)