Why have kids knowing that the tantrums, stress etc with it?

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There are times when kids come across as adorable and put a smile on my face but I do see some that scream, shout, have tantrums, always want your attention etc especially if they are toddlers like my 4 year old nephew. Yesterday there were a couple of times where he kept entering my room, seeing what I was doing and looking at my background photo on my chromebook and I found it quite annoying but obviously I didn't want to upset or get annoyed at him but it made want to leave the room in order to try to get him to leave the room. I remember Mum telling me along the lines of ''Well, do you still want kids ? because that's what you've got to put up with.''

I seem to feel as though people just have kids not always because they ''want'' to but that they ''have'' to because its a part of the circle of life and to ''follow the Joneses'' and seeing myself not doing that despite not being in a relationship or as yet have met someone, it feels like time is ''running out'' because I'm at an age to be serious and think about it now rather than later. These ridiculous thoughts of rushing through life just makes me feel sometimes unable to enjoy life being a single person.

This is some of the reasons why a part of me feels that I ''have'' to have children just to look as though I'm ''keeping up'' with other peers like my sister even though she never intended to have a baby but just got pregnant. The other part of me feels that I don't want my own child knowing the stress, tantrums and so on that comes along with it. Its very frustrating as I feel conflicted between two mindsets of wanting and not wanting children.

A lot of people think having kids is something you just have to do when you're an adult, especially if they're married. If you're "childless by choice" society thinks you're some kind of an evil monster, or you're selfish. Never mind that raising a kid is insanely expensive and plus the world right now isn't such a great place to be born in.

Oh and then there are the people who say "Who will take care of you when you get old?" HA! More like "Who will stick you into a nursing home and ignore you during your last few years of life while the nursing home staff treats you like garbage?" Seriously, criminals in jail actually get treated better than seniors in a nursing home.

I think there might often be an instinctual desire/drive rooted in evolution at work. My longing for a child was almost primal. It’s hard to describe, but it had nothing to do with wanting to keep up with the Joneses. A lot of couples have one or even no children, so it seems like peer pressure might be less of a motivator than it was in the past. Of course, there’s a lot of variation depending on where you live too.

I have never had any strong urge to have children. Intellectually, it sounds like a bad idea for me and my circumstances.