Rants

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Neurotypicals treat us like garbage. When we're children, they don't want to be our friends. They don't let us on their sports teams or in their clubs. They bully the crap out of us.

When we reach adulthood, it's not much better. No matter how smart we are, no matter how educated we are, regardless of our qualifications, neurotypicals don't want to hire us. No wonder more than 80% of autistic adults are unemployed. Thus, many autistics are forced to live on some form of social assistance, which is basically legislated poverty.

But of course, the neurotypicals will blame us for not fitting in. They'll tell us it's our fault for not having social skills, it's our fault for not making eye contact, it's our fault for not putting ourselves out there. Basically, it's our fault for being autistic.

Worse still, most of those who claim to support us don't really support us. They support converting us to neurotypicals. This is why we have s**t like ABA/IBI therapy, which is basically autism conversion therapy that parents of autistic children go broke paying for. This autism conversion therapy is as wrong as conversion therapy for gays. It ought to be banned.

Besides, no matter how neurotypical we become, no matter how much our social skills or eye contact improve, the neurotypicals will still not accept us.

So what do we do about it? We're not a major voting bloc, so we can't really exercise political power. Honestly, to bring attention to our persecution, we may have no choice but to resort to illegal methods, even violence, because I don't know how else we're going to persuade neurotypicals to stop ostracizing us and treating us like s**t.

Just hearing people talk makes me angry and frustrated. I talk to them, and they act as if I'm a space alien who just spoke in an unknown language even though I used simple, one-syllable words. And then they tell me to do stuff that just confuses me and makes me feel like a 5 year old. Or they tell me to do things as if I am a five year old instead of a grown adult who can think for herself. Like how to use an ATM machine or a self-checkout. Of course, it's easier for me to use them when someone isn't staring at me watching and judging my every move.

NT humans are such condescending creatures that make no sense and just being near them drives me insane. How can they gather in large groups and babble mindlessly to each other? How can they stand the constant noise and lack of space. It's like having a bee's nest in my brain.

So annoyed with people online. I try to find people with a similar music taste. However only the trolls reply. It makes me angry. Don't reply if you don't like it.

I feel bad, not only about myself but also about my life. At the same time, I can understand that my life is just monotonous, accompanied by my hostile projection, far from being bad. But why is my life boring, why is there hostile projection, in the final analysis, I have shaped it myself. And why do I do this, I can't get an answer.
I want to get a simple and upright ideological and political education, just like I got when I was growing up, but I can't find it.
I feel that my situation is uncomfortable, but I can't find the reason.

I want my defense mechanism to be an overachieving workaholic that grew to hate work but is addicted to it, than a maladaptive daydreamer who wanted nothing to do with those stories.

Hell, even retaining obsessions and special interest no thanks to burning out. I'd take it.


Yes, this could be more ambitious than being autistic and not having social anxiety.
Harnessing feelings of negative emotions into productivity is one very common thing... Making it it's source of being soother is another.

My true rant is that I want this old self to rest in peace, and in it's place; being more like myself.

Not as ambitious as ridding off executive dysfunction entirely.

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Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.

In this relationship, I am the bully - AI told me so.
I tried to eliminate all the uncertainty and instability in the relationship, but in the final analysis, the source of this instability is my girlfriend, another soul.
I am incapable of love if I insist on using reason to guide my life.
Maybe, I was incapable of love from the beginning.

I'm like bloody Billy Muggins me keeping jumping up to the door buzzer when it's not even parcels for my flat

It's the next doors and you never know if they're in or out because they just don't respond...to anyone

We had to let their lad in the other day When he was stranded outside like a feral flipping cat

It's since the menopause hit her, I swear it is because she was always sociable until then but now she's like a bleeping hermit crab

I got a post of mine deleted on here the other day (not unusual I know)

I mean I wouldn't have even noticed it was reported if I hadn't have got moderator PM because I didn't actually give the post in question a second thought

But it was a valid question that I asked and it just made me think that if I was waiting for a discussion or an answer to my query then I didn't even get a chance

This actually upset me because it was harmless and there was no bad intentions with it but it just proves my point that some people just want to stifle other people's thoughts, opinions and questions just because they don't like it and because it doesn't fit in with their way of thinking it it's triggering to them So their attitude to it is to just f**k everyone else (skews my language)

^ Unfortunately, being on a forum like this one makes one vulnerable to sometimes punitive reporting from other users.

^ Speculation like that isn't helpful and in any case, it's not what happened.
I saw the post for myself.

I think babybird knows she can talk to me about anything, including this removal.

Christ you can't have a decent rant around here

Is there an unwritten rule somewhere where it says rants are not to be responded to

But I didn't do that

i was just getting something off my chest that was festering away in my head